i forgot to put a message here

last time LMAO but anyway hi!

i got a playlist link for you (;

Unfortunately, Sae refused to leave Jeongguk alone at the house because luckily for him, Dr. Kim told her about Taehyung's "plans' for them that the guy apparently wouldn't shut up about.

And with that, he begrudgingly joined his aunt on the drive to the hospital, listening to her go "it'll be fun!" and "it's a new experience" for the duration of the entire ride, which left him fucking fuming in his seat.

Jeongguk didn't like going outside, only because it was a huge hassle, and there was the fact he would run into people from when he was still normal. They were not a nice bunch. Also there were a lot of strangers that loved to pity people. It was a silent type of pity, but Jeongguk could feel their bullshit whenever he entered a room, and that was enough to not want to go out.

He didn't need to tell Taehyung that because obviously, the guy wouldn't understand, and he didn't have the energy to explain to him about all that. So, Jeongguk was lowkey riding on the plan to convince him he wasn't feeling too good and just flake!

God, all he wanted to do was flake on the guy just to see his shitty, cocky smirk fade. Well, part of him did. The other half just wished he stopped wasting his time on him— there wasn't anything good that would come out of interacting with him.

But Sae really wanted him to go. She was way more excited than he was to learn he had plans, and god, all morning she was bouncy and smiley. She even made him pancakes! Pancakes. With strawberries and whipped cream.

As much as Jeongguk wanted to crush Taehyung's hope, he just couldn't bring himself to end his aunt's happiness.

So, when he entered that hospital, parting ways with Sae right away as much as he didn't want her to go, Jeongguk awkwardly stood around, scanning the foyer for the familiar head of silver hair. He never really liked the foyer, but honestly he didn't like a lot of things— it was natural to just hate everything.

But it wasn't too hard to find Taehyung. How could he not? He was a tall guy, bit muscular, and he was so horribly hunched over his tiny ass phone, that it gave Jeongguk the strongest urge to bully him.

He wasn't so sure if he should approach him first. Would that come across as too eager? Probably, and there was no way he'd let that guy believe he was excited to see him. Although, Jeongguk guessed he had to get this over with, and so, he put on the biggest scowl and approached him.

"Hi," He said stiffly, regretting ever speaking when Taehyung whipped his head up, his gaze falling over him in a way that made him shift awkwardly.

Jeongguk swallowed, nose scrunching as he wrenched his head the other way, not daring to meet his eye anymore— that was weird. Luckily, Taehyung didn't seem to notice anything off.

"Hey," Taehyung said, and god, he sounded perky. It was like what, six in the morning? "You look nice."

"Nice?" Jeongguk forced out, now having no choice but to give him a nasty glare. "Thank you." He added begrudgingly.

"Awh, you're so nice to me," Taehyung chuckled. It was deep sound. Made Jeongguk shiver because holy shit, this guy's voice was uncomfortably low.

"Think you can give me a little smile, Ggukie?"

"No, and ew, don't ever call me that," Jeongguk grimaced, watching as a smile blossomed over Taehyung's lips. Sighing, he jabbed his thumb over his shoulder toward the exit, "I'm gonna go if you're just gonna waste my time looking like an idiot."

"We didn't even start yet," He snorted. "You haven't even heard of where I'm gonna take you."

"Do I want to?" Jeongguk frowned. Taehyung pushed off the wall he was leaning on and grabbed him by the elbow, making him flinch.

"Hey! We're not on touching terms yet!" He tried to swat him off, but Taehyung's grip was awfully firm, though gentle enough it wasn't hurting his boney ass. But even so, it still bothered him.

"Touching terms?" Taehyung mused, continuing to lead him along as Jeongguk's shoulders slumped in defeat when he realized this guy was the most stubborn bastard he ever met.

"Yeah, you're not there yet, so get your nasty hands off of me," Jeongguk snapped, "Seriously, who knows where your hands have been."

"In that dispenser," Taehyung replied nonchalantly.

"Is that a sexual innuendo for vagina?" Jeongguk asked, horrified. Taehyung gave him a look, his bushy brows knitted together.

"Jeon, what the fuck. Who do you think I am?" He asked, pressing his hand to his chest. Jeongguk shrugged, while his other hand pried his fingers off of him.

"A straight guy. Is that enough of an insult?" He gestured at his current attire consisting of skinny jeans, the godforsaken vans, and an oversized hoodie with the goddamn hoodie laces tied into a bow. All he needed was the fried noodle hair.

"Y'know, those musty fuckboys. You look like one."

"Ouch. Give fellow straight people some love," Taehyung rolled his eyes. "And I'm not a fuckboy. I'm very much loyal."

"Are you really, dude?" Jeongguk squinted at him. He nodded, flashing him that stupid ass smirk.

"I can prove it to you my guy," Taehyung nudged his shoulder. "But one quick question, are you gay or something? Usually it's not a problem that I'm straight but—,"

"—I'm not gay," He cut him off, voice stiff. "And why would it be a problem even if I was?"

"Oh because I wanted to make sure you wouldn't fall in love with me!" Taehyung beamed. Jeongguk pretended to gag. "I'm joking with you. If you're gay or straight, I could care less. You're still Jeongguk to me."

"Can you be any less fucking cheesy?" Jeongguk grimaced, watching as a chuckle escapes past Taehyung's wide smile. Shaking his head, he trailed after him, following Taehyung out of the hospital and to the parking area where his car was parked, wanting to get this over with already.

"Can you drive?" Taehyung asked him, fishing his keys out of his pocket when they approached his car.

Jeongguk shook his head, "Never learned. Never wanted to."

"Oh come on. Really?" He got into the passenger seat, feeling Taehyung's eyes on him as he buckled his seatbelt. "Why not?"

"I have nowhere to go," Jeongguk answered curtly, refusing to meet his curious eyes. "Plus my aunt's worried I'll get heavily depressed one day and try to out myself the easy way."

For a second, the car fell silent. Oops.

"Well," Taehyung whistled, starting the car after a few beats of silence settled between them. "Are you depressed?"

"What kind of question is that?" Jeongguk scoffed, turning to face him only to shoot Taehyung a dirty look. Taehyung shrugged, beginning to back up from the parking lot.

"I'm just trying to get to know you."

"So you're asking for all my trauma first?"

"Well, we can start with your favorite color if you'd prefer that instead."

Jeongguk's features scrunched together, his lips a permanent scowl. "You're weird. Really, really weird."

"I am? Didn't know that. People call it charming, y'know," Taehyung said cheekily. Jeongguk rolled his eyes, crossed his arms, and sunk further into his seat, already hating every second of this.

"Where are we going?" He managed out, trying to change the subject to something that required less of him talking and more of Taehyung because at least he could tune him out in the meantime.

"Not too far from here," Taehyung said, his attention already on the road. "Do you like food?"

"Yeah...? What kind of question is that?"

"Great! Because we're gonna get smoothies."

"Then why did you ask if I liked food?"

"Just 'cause," Taehyung giggled. Do guys giggle? Jeongguk wasn't sure, but he swore that guy let out a genuine giggle. "It's a really good smoothie place though. I go here from time to time."

"You do?" He pretended to sound interested, and somehow, Taehyung believed it.

"Yep! If you want a recommendation, I really like the orange creamsicle flavor. It's equal parts cream, orange, and sexiness."

"Sexiness?" Jeongguk spat out, glaring at him.

"Yeah? What about it?" Taehyung glanced at him briefly, that goddamn smirk of his sitting wide over his lips. Jeongguk wanted to punch him.

"You calling a drink sexy makes me not want to buy it," Jeongguk admitted. "Like, you just ruined it for me."

At that, Taehyung merely snorted, and surprisingly, he didn't say anything for the rest of the ride. It wasn't too bad though, and his life somehow wasn't threatened during it despite his expectations. But even so, he wasn't really focused on that. Instead, he took the time to look around Taehyung's car.

It was a normal car, yes, Jeongguk couldn't deny that. Although, that wasn't what he cared about. On his emergency brake, the guy strangely had a few hair ties. Jeongguk didn't question it because no way he wanted to picture girls getting in this car and Taehyung offering them a hair tie to give him road head as much as it fit the douchebag's character to do such a thing.

And also there was the fact Jeongguk didn't want to picture that especially when there was a chance he was sitting in the crime scene. Gross. Anyway, there was one other thing dangling from his rearview mirror that caught his eye when he got in.

It wasn't anything too big or special, but Jeongguk wasn't so sure Taehyung was the type of guy to dangle a little cactus from his mirror. It was a cute charm with a tiny smiley face and a heart.

Part of him wanted to touch it, though he knew it would be weird to man handle a stranger's personal property. He tried not to think about it too much because god, once he noticed the damn thing, its clay eyes peered into his fucking soul.

Luckily it didn't get to explore too much. When they arrived at the smoothie place, he realized it wasn't too far from the hospital. Eventually, Jeongguk found himself following Taehyung inside.

"Order anything," He said, gesturing at Jeongguk to go to the front. Before Jeongguk could walk forward, he watched as Taehyung pulled out his phone, averting all his attention to it.

"You think I'm gonna order for you?" Jeongguk asked, not bothering to hide the annoyance in his tone.

"No. I'll join you in a second." Taehyung didn't look up.

Jeongguk's eyebrows furrowed, not quite expecting the sudden change in his attitude. He eyed him up and down, trying to figure out what made bouncy boy's mood plummet. Though Jeongguk didn't dwell on it for too long; it wasn't his problem to worry about.

He ordered a banana smoothie, barely even glancing at the stupid menu. But right before he could pay the poor minimum-wage worker slaving away at their job, he added, "Can you make me an orange creamsicle one too?"

The worker gave him a funny look (which Jeongguk expected, nobody liked that shit) but she took his order anyway. As a thanks for dealing with him, he paid her extra, and waited around for Taehyung who, shocker, was still on his phone.

He wasn't so sure if he should bother him, because unlike him, he knew when to not butt in. But he couldn't ignore it now, how his eyebrows twisted and contorted, and the smile he wore faded into a thin line.

It was odd, but they just weren't close enough, hell they weren't even friends, for Jeongguk to really care. Plus he doubted Taehyung wanted to talk about it.

Jeongguk decided to just leave him be. It was probably for the best anyway.

With some time, Taehyung shoved his phone back into his pocket albeit looking a bit pained when he joined Jeongguk's side. Right around the same time, their orders came out, and once Taehyung was in front of him, Jeongguk handed him his drink, watching as his smile bloomed once more.

"Thank you, Jeon. Were you thinking about me?" He wiggled his eyebrows at him, and in seconds, he acted like nothing even happened.

"Fuck you," Jeongguk settled with. Taehyung merely laughed, or well, it was more of a choked out sound, but nonetheless, the two headed to a booth in the back.

"So," Taehyung started, sliding into the seat in front of him, the air around them less tight and more airy like before.

"I brought you here to give you a proposition."

"A proposition?" Jeongguk sipped at his drink. It was awfully sweet, but he guessed it wouldn't kill him to finish it. These were painfully overpriced smoothies so he might as well drink it.

"Yep," Taehyung popped his 'p', propping his elbows on the table. "Y'know how Namjoon talked about us being partners so we can show eachother new experiences?"

"Yeah," He nodded along, chewing on his straw. "I got nothing to show you though."

"Well, that's okay," He said. "I think we should make a bucket list."

"A bucket list? What are you, eighty?" Jeongguk snorted.

"No, but you know what you are?" He raised an eyebrow at Taehyung.

"You're dying!"

Jeongguk blinked. Taehyung shot him a ridiculous set of finger guns. He blinked yet again.

"Was that too early?" Taehyung asked, bringing his hands back down while the other found purchase on the side of his neck. Jeongguk glared at him, taking a rather aggressive sip of his smoothie.

"Thank you for the reminder," Jeongguk said. "And no, you said what everyone already knows."

"Did I make you feel better though?"

"How the fuck was that supposed to make me feel better?"

"I dunno. The shock factor gets people going," He grinned. Jeongguk rolled his eyes. Man, he was really working them today, but he guessed that was what happened when you spent time with the incarnate of pure dumbassery.

"Alright, but anyway," Taehyung leaned forward, which in turn, made Jeongguk back up more. "I think we should complete a bucket list. Get things done. Have fun. All that bangin' stuff."

"You know we might not finish it," Jeongguk said.

"I know," He shrugged, "but that's the beauty of life. Some things will never truly be completed."

"That's fair," He admitted slowly, twirling his straw in his cup, regretting that super aggressive slurp because now he had a brain freeze pinching at his skull.

"So you wanna do it? We can do whatever you want. You're the one dying here, so I don't wanna waste your time," Taehyung pulled out his phone, but this time he just opened up the notes app.

"Aren't you dying too?" Jeongguk asked, but he immediately regretted it because Taehyung let out a curt laugh. Although it sounded like a bark, to be honest.

"No, I'm not," Taehyung shook his head, resting his tiny phone on the table between them. "I only go just 'coz my brother wants me to. And if I was, I would have said it earlier." Jeongguk eyed him skeptically.

"What? You think I'm lying?"

At that, Jeongguk shrugged, "People like bullshit."

"Well, I'm not dying. I'm being honest. No bullshit there," He crossed his arms over the table, tilting his head a little to the side so that his silver fringe fell over his eyes.

"Alrighty then," Jeongguk sighed, setting his smoothie to the side.

"Okay," Taehyung repeated before quickly adding, "You wanna do this or not? It can be like ten things or less. All of them are gonna be things you wanna do though."

"What would I write down?" Jeongguk asked.

"Stuff," He shrugged. "When did you get cancer?"

"When I was seventeen," He answered.

"Then you did chemo for about a year, yeah? Must have missed a bunch of highschool crap." At that, Jeongguk hummed. "Okay, then write about stuff you wished you could have done before you got sick."

"But I'm still sick," Jeongguk's brows bunched together.

Taehyung snorted, taking a sip of his painfully bright orange drink, "Not right now you aren't. You look healthy to me." Jeongguk still didn't feel like it.

"C'mon now. Don't hold back. Life's too short to hold back. Put down whatever."

Honestly, Jeongguk really didn't want to do any of this, but he remembered that all of this was for Sae. She would have wanted him to do this, to enjoy his life, or whatever that meant. And plus, like he said, they might not even get to finish this anyways.

There wasn't really any harm in doing this when they only met every Tuesday and Thursday, so it wasn't like he was going to spend too much time with him. And if they were gonna hang out, Taehyung told him he'd only do things he wanted to do.

Again, it wasn't like he was going to be doing things against his will either. He bit the side of his inner cheek, drumming his fingers over the counter, and after some more internal debate he nodded once again.

"Can I see it?"

Taehyung nodded, pushing his phone closer to Jeongguk. He took it, though grimaced seeing how small the gadget was in his palm, but nonetheless he jotted down the first fifteen things that came to mind.

When he was done, he showed Taehyung. He bit at the edge of his thumb, watching quietly as he scanned through his list. It annoyed him a little how he didn't seem to react when reading it over, keeping from Jeongguk from mentally slapping himself for putting something stupid down.

"It might be stupid—," He started, but Taehyung held a finger up, silencing him.

Taehyung took a bit, but eventually he set the phone back down and gave Jeongguk a warm smile. He expected him to speak, though Taehyung said nothing. He just kept staring, and for some reason, Jeongguk could feel himself shrinking beneath his heavy gaze.

It didn't feel good, being watched and hopefully not being psychoanalyzed. Who knew what he was thinking.

"Don't look at me like that," Jeongguk blurted, and thankfully, Taehyung averted his gaze back to his smoothie. The older's shoulders shook with silent laughter, and that smirk, oh that dumb smirk, found its place on his lips again.

"I'll make your last six months worth living, Jeon Jeongguk," Taehyung said.

"You didn't think any of that was stupid?" He raised an eyebrow at him. Taehyung shook his head.

"It sounds fun. I'm down for it," Taehyung beamed.

"You're not gonna make fun of me?"

"Jeongguk," He said softly, and ew, Jeongguk hated it. Thankfully, he got the cue, and cleared his throat, starting over. "This is a good list. I'm being honest."

"No bullshit," Jeongguk pressed again. Taehyung nodded, raising his pinky up. "I'm gonna tell you one thing right now, I don't like bullshit. Life's too short to make lies, y'know."

"That's a good motto to live by. I'll keep it in mind," He chuckled. "I promise, by the way, to have no bullshit between us. I'll be a hundred percent honest with you, Jeon Jeongguk."

"Good," Jeongguk huffed. He jutted his chin at his pinky, "What are you doing?"

"Shake my pinky, bro. Seal the deal."

"Never say that again," He deadpanned. Taehyung wiggled his pinky at him.