Jeongguk was getting weaker by the day, and it wasn't just him who began to notice.

Ever since the day they were locked in the meeting room, Taehyung and he went back to normal, or well, as normal as things could get between them. It was back to running away from time as fast as they could, foolishly attempting to play god just so they can have more time, more memories and finish his bucketlist.

They still had a couple left, but it wasn't easy like it was at the beginning. Lately, Jeongguk had to leave meetings to dump the contents of his already emptied stomach out in a nearby bathroom. Other times, when Taehyung and he walked down to the parking-lot, he needed a couple of minutes to rest, his body already aching, exhausted.

Taehyung didn't seem to mind, but another issue with Jeongguk getting sicker is that they had no time to consider what happened between them. It wasn't like he could bring it up when he was on the verge of passing out— that was stupid.

However, part of him really wanted to know what they were, where they stood. Taehyung hadn't said much since then, and Jeongguk guessed it would be brought up eventually. Whenever "eventually" was.

"That's such a fucking bummer," Taehyung said, the two back inside his car after a trip to the DMV.

"Why are you sad?" Jeongguk asked, putting on his seatbelt. "You know I'd fail the medical exam."

"Still!" Taehyung pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. Jeongguk raised an eyebrow at him, finding it a little cute how upset he was. Seeing him care about him was a brand new, amazing feeling he couldn't quite forget.

"It's a driver's license! They need to know how monumental it is for a dying person!"

"I think they know that it's also detrimental for a dying person," Jeongguk snorted. "It's fine. I can't get my license 'cuz I'm probably a hazard to society behind the wheel anyway. I knew it was gonna happen."

"That's so stupid though," Taehyung grumbled. "I'm still going to let you drive." He declared.

"I don't think that's a good idea either," Jeongguk said. "What if I pass out behind the wheel?"

"Then we're both dying," He snorted. Before Jeongguk could argue with him about how terrible of an idea that was, Taehyung shot upward in his seat, an excited gasp escaping past his lips.

"Jeongguk— don't you have a wish? Y'know, when terminally ill people are close to kicking the bucket, they get a wish?" Taehyung clapped, probably thinking it was some genius idea. Jeongguk, on the otherhand, wasn't so impressed.

"What?" Taehyung deflated when he noticed he was frowning at him.

"I already used my wish," Jeongguk's nose crinkled.

Taehyung's expression fell, "You what?"

"Yeah," He shifted awkwardly, fixing his gaze ahead just so Taehyung wouldn't see the blush that crept over his pale cheeks. "I used it as a joke when I first got diagnosed. I decided to go to disneyland."

"Disneyland. Fucking disneyland," He blinked incredulously at him. "Do you even like disneyland?"

"Nope," Jeongguk shrank in his seat. "I mean, I went with Sae, and it was fine. It wasn't like a bad memory, so don't get me wrong." He meant it, although part of him did regret using his wish on something as generic as disneyland, but hey— it was a good laugh at the time.

"But you didn't go with your parents? Y'know, I've kinda realized you never told me where they are." He said carefully. At that, Jeongguk's shoulders tensed.

"Do your parents even know you're sick?"

If this was somebody else, Jeongguk would have snapped at them to mind their own business, or at least say something unpleasant, but even so it was Taehyung who asked. Not some random stranger trying to pry into his life and find something to pity, to hold above him and belittle him in the process.

However, few people knew what happened except Sae and some of their relatives that remembered he existed. Jeongguk was aware of them only because they sent cards and flowers whenever word got out that he was starting treatment. Otherwise, his world mostly consisted of Sae, and there was no need to explain it to anyone else.

But Taehyung was different. Somehow, he pried apart his world and fit himself right in. Even though Jeongguk absolutely despised him at the beginning, believing Taehyung was just like the rest— he was wrong. Horribly wrong, because this idiot with that stupid, rectangular grin and terrible tastes in music made his world feel a little less small and a little more special.

So it didn't faze him like it would have when his lips parted and the answer slipped effortlessly off his tongue because telling him felt right. Strangely right. Like he could tell him things, and Taehyung wouldn't treat him any differently regardless, and that— that was refreshing.

"My parents gave me up when I was really young and they don't talk to Sae, so, no. I don't think they know." He said. Taehyung's eyes widened for a split second before he regained his composure.

"Really? I mean— that's just heavy. If you don't wanna talk about—," Taehyung stammered, only sealing his mouth shut when Jeongguk gently placed his hand on forearm resting on the space between them.

"It's fine," Jeongguk murmured, feeling his heart throb in his chest. Taehyung's expression was unreadable like it always was, but eventually he gave him a small smile in exchange and he nodded at Jeongguk to continue.

Swallowing dryly, he slowly began and said, "I don't really remember much of them except from what Sae tells me. Apparently my mom was irresponsible and wasn't fit to take care of me. My dad left before I could really know him. Haven't seen either of them since I was sent to Sae during her residency years, but I mean, it's fine I guess."

"You never wanted to contact them?" Taehyung asked. Jeongguk shook his head, feeling like some invisible weight was lifting off his chest.

"If they cared enough about me, they would have reached out years ago," Jeongguk shrugged, hating how his throat felt tight. "Some people aren't meant to be parents, but I have Sae. She's all I need."

"I'm glad you have her too, jeez. Some people really aren't meant to have kids," Taehyung whistled. "But hey, without them, you wouldn't be here." He teased, nudging Jeongguk's side.

"Oh shut up," Jeongguk rolled his eyes, fighting the urge to smile as his cheeks flooded with that familiar warmth— the only warmth he was able to feel recently. "C'mon, we should get out of here."

"Why? Is the DMV not romantic enough for you?" Taehyung chuckled, hand settling over the gear.

"Don't make me regret telling you shit, Kim," Jeongguk muttered, glaring at him.

"I'm kidding," Taehyung beamed, the way his voice lowered making Jeongguk's stomach twist. "I have somewhere to bring you anyway. Feel tired?"

"Tired? No, not really, why?" Jeongguk asked, lifting an eyebrow at him. Taehyung grinned and winked at him.

"You'll see," He said, and with that, they were on to their next adventure.

Jeongguk's brows bunched together when he realized they were pulling into the parking garage of one of Seoul's nicest hotels. Casting a confused glance over at Taehyung once they parked (albeit crookedly, but he assured him that it was fine to be a little rebellious), he noticed that he was ignoring him.

"What are we doing here?" Jeongguk grumbled when they got out. He locked the car before bursting into a light jog to keep up with Taehyung. But luckily he noticed and slowed down just for him.

"We're here to have fun," Taehyung said.

"But this is a luxury hotel," He pointed out.

"Exactly," He said. Noticing the concern written all over Jeongguk's features, Taehyung sighed and rolled his eyes. "Fine. My mom's boyfriend's staying here right now for some business thing, and I know his room key password."

"And what are we gonna do with that?" Jeongguk asked, following him into the elevator.

"We're gonna hack the system!" Taehyung clapped his hands together in excitement.

"Are you fine with some constructive criticism?" He grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. "I don't want to hurt your 'feely weelys'."

"Awh, look at you being so considerate," Taehyung cooed, reaching over and pinching his cheek. He glared at him and swatted his hand away. At that, Taehyung snickered. "Go ahead, tell me."

"Your plan fucking sucks." Jeongguk said bluntly.

Taehyung deflated, "Hey... that's not constructive criticism."

Jeongguk merely shook his head and rolled his eyes, ignoring the pout fitting over Taehyung's lips despite how it made his heart race. Thankfully, the elevator doors parted, and the two headed out into the lobby without another word. But this time, they were joined at eachother's sides.

He wasn't a stranger to fancy hotels like this, where the floors were polished marble, legitimate diamond chandeliers hung from the ceiling, and everything screamed "this is expensive! don't touch!". Sae let him tag along to her conferences, and most of them were held at cool places like this.

Sometimes they would play a game where they guessed what was the most useless expensive item in the room when the rich doctors and business people came to be too much. He sighed contently at the memory, wondering if this would be the last time he'd ever step into one of these places.

Taehyung, on the otherhand, didn't look too happy passing through. He kept his gaze straight ahead, not bothering to crack a joke or rant to him about how ridiculous rich people were like Jeongguk expected him to. Frowning at the change in his attitude, Jeongguk bit at the inner wall of his cheek.

"Hey Tae," Jeongguk nudged his side when they stopped for another elevator. Taehyung glanced over at him, lifting a thick brow at him.

"Look at that," He cleared his throat, pointing at the first thing he saw: an ugly ass vase. "That's one ugly ass vase."

At that, Taehyung's lips twitched. "That is one ugly ass vase."

"Probably costs an unfortunate amount of money too," Jeongguk added, attempting to keep the conversation from getting awkward but for some reason Taehyung was staring at him a lot longer than usual. He shifted on his feet.

Eventually, Taehyung let out a tired laugh and patted his shoulder, "What a waste, huh?"

"Hell yeah," Jeongguk shook an 'angry' fist at him. "Imagine being the poor bastard who had to order that ugly ass vase."

Taehyung couldn't help but grin. He gave Jeongguk one last, amused look, his hands snaking into his pants pockets, and walked into the elevator right as it dinged open. Jeongguk bit back a stupid smile and shook his head at the ground before joining him.

Mission accomplished, he guessed.

"Do you know what you're doing?" The two of them had been standing at the locked door for fifteen minutes now, and Taehyung still hadn't figured out the code yet.

"Don't worry Jeon," His mood seemed to be better than earlier, but he could hear the frustration edge his words. "I know exactly what I'm doing, my guy. Everything is going juuuust fine."

"How can you still say that?" Jeongguk crossed his arms. Taehyung glanced over his shoulder and shrugged.

"'Coz sometimes, when shit gets tough, denial is all we have," He sighed as the door lock beeped again. Taehyung stood back, one hand perched on his hip as the other carded through his silver hair. "Fuck."

"What's the code?" He asked, deciding to push him aside and give it a shot.

"It's 3435," Taehyung muttered, "but I don't think it's gonna work. Maybe I got the code wrong when my mom told me it, or the thing is just bus—," His shoulders slumped when the lock hissed and the door popped open.

"Jeon," He scowled. At that, Jeongguk gave him a smug smirk. "Fuck you."

"What? Denial is all we have," Jeongguk mimicked him in a nasally voice. He simply patted his elbow and pushed open the door, smiling proudly to himself as Taehyung silently fumed behind him.

However, the glory didn't last very long when Jeongguk's gaze averted to the massive, indoor swimming pool right in front of him.

"A swimming pool," Jeongguk's smile immediately fell. "With windows." He glanced warily at the huge, transparent panes overlooking the entire city below them.

"Didn't you want to go to one?" Taehyung's voice echoed from behind him. Jeongguk scowled.

"What makes you— no," Realization lit up in his mind like a goddamn lightbulb. Jeongguk spun around and shook his head rapidly at him.

"No. We are not doing this." He shot him down.

"What? You wanted to skinny dip," Taehyung retorted.

"Yeah, with hot babes!" He gestured angrily at him, throat tightening, "You are not a hot babe!"

"Well, I'm a hot babe of the opposite sex. I'm the next best thing. And you like me," He teased.

"Okay no. Shut up. Don't pull that card," Jeongguk snapped.

"Uh, why not? You confessed," Taehyung placed his hands on his hips, frowning a little.

His neck was on fire. "So?" He scrambled for another reason, panic rising in his throat and he ended up blurting— "You fucked a girl!"

"What? I mean, I have before, but not recently. Why, does that bother you?" He lifted an eyebrow at him. Jeongguk scoffed lightly, a look of pure horror contorting his features.

"No?" He winced. He didn't mean to make it sound like a question. At that, both of Taehyung's thick brows raised over his forehead. "I mean, no. No. It doesn't but still. That's weird."

"What's weird? I told you, it's been a while."

"And?" He scowled. "You had intercourse before. I don't want to swim with ur potential sperm mingling in the fucking pool!"

"Jeon. That's not how science works," Taehyung chuckled. Jeongguk's neck flushed a deeper shade of scaret.

"I failed high school biology."

"I can tell."

"Woah, woah, woah, woah— who told you to fucking strip?" Before he could further convince him that this was a horrible idea, Taehyung's hands lifted the hem of his own shirt up.

He revealed the lower half of his stomach, and fuck—of course this guy was built. He shrank in place, eyes splaying wide seeing the beginning of his tan v-line. His eyes were an unfortunate victim to a fine trail of black hair beneath Taehyung's navel, and the band of his black Calvin Klein underwear peeking beneath the waistline of his jeans.

Jeongguk was near hysterics. God, this guy was going to be the death of him, and all he was doing was smiling at him like this was just another, early morning thing. Screw that smirk of his. Screw him.

"You're just looking for an excuse to get naked, aren't you?" He stammered, hating how he was burning up. Was he sweating? No, the sweltering heat that was drowning him in sweat had to be the fault of all the layers he was wearing.

"No, not at all," Taehyung tugged off his shirt in one fell swoop. Unlike his own build, he was muscular and beefier. He couldn't help but feel his stomach prickle with jealousy over Taehyung's tanned abs. Sure, they were a bit faint but they were still there.

This was unfair. Life was unfair. Maybe if he told Taehyung to cover his eyes, he could drown himself in the fucking pool, or something.

Jeongguk gulped thickly, shoulders caving together when Taehyung took a step closer to him.

"I'm not stripping you heathen," Jeongguk hissed.

"You don't have to be naked, Jeon. I won't even be naked," Taehyung rested his hand over his chest, right over the scar that Jeongguk couldn't ignore even if he tried.

Unlike the picture he received all that time ago, it was more obvious in the stark lighting. The skin was marred and scarred over in a straight, unpleasantly pink line. He picked through his memories, trying to remember what surgery that scar would come from, and even so why would—

"You're staring, my guy," Taehyung cleared his throat when Jeongguk said nothing. He blinked a few times before averting his gaze back to his face, only to be met with an unimpressed expression.

"Sorry," He whispered, gaze accidentally flitting back to the scar when Taehyung let his arms fall at his sides.

"You're looking at my scar, aren't you?"

"What? No," Jeongguk's voice faded. He nearly choked on his sentence, not knowing what to do now without looking like more of an idiot.

"Jeon, listen," He watched in complete disgust as Taehyung kicked his shoes away and tugged off his jeans. "If you swim with me, we can make a deal. You knock out this one thing in your bucketlist, and then I'll tell you about how I got this bad guy." He pointed at his chest.

"But you don't get anything out of that deal," Jeongguk bit at his lip. Taehyung rolled his eyes.

When he didn't say anything, Taehyung sighed and shoved his fingers through his silver hair. Man, he didn't really want to do this. Being half-naked was one thing, but being half-naked around Taehyung? There were a lot of things wrong with that!

"Fine. If you really insist then you have to buy me ice cream after this with that pretty black card of yours. Sounds good?" He crossed his arms over his chest, giving Jeongguk these incredibly stupid puppy eyes that honestly put him at a disadvantage since they made him look even more ridiculous.

Jeongguk really had no choice, did he? Of course, Taehyung was going to be like this, but besides all of the pleading and somewhat faulty reasoning, there was a point. He wrote this down knowing that it would lead up to this, and it wasn't like it'd be weird if they did skinnydip. They were both dudes with the same parts Jeongguk saw on the daily, and he was going to totally ignore the fact he confessed.

And on top of that, Taehyung was always going the extra mile to make him feel comfortable. Of course he was going to be sweet about it, and as much as he hated it, Jeongguk wasn't an unappreciative asshole. Well, he was an asshole but certainly not the ungrateful kind.

Jeongguk inhaled unevenly, running one of his hands down his arm, debating whether he should just go for it. Chickening out wasn't something he'd usually consider. However, this was a different circumstance. A completely different circumstance.

But eventually, he let out a sigh and murmured faintly, "Fine. I'll skinny dip with you. But you can't... just— just don't look at me." For some reason, forcing those words out left his chest all heavy and gross and, god, he wanted to simply disappear.