Endless Bonds Copyright © 2016-2018 xXMopelXx All Rights Reserved.

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"Hey...Nat. It's me. Just calling to check up on you. It's been awhile, and I guess I just wanted to hear your voice. Call me back when you can -"

Her answering machine cuts me off before I can finish.

I stare down at my cellphone, my eyebrows knitting together. What was I even thinking, it must be like 2 am in New York city. My sister must be sleeping.

My ringtone goes off and a selfie of Nat and I flashes on my screen. I swipe quickly. "Hello."

Her gravelly voice greets me and it's such a damn relief. "Jesus Christ, Trent. Anyone ever explained you the concept of time zones?"

"Nat...Hey," I breathe into the receiver, before reclining on my couch and staring up at my ceiling.

Nat picks up on my tone. Suddenly there's rustling on the other side, as if she's shifting and fully waking up. I feel guilty for two point five seconds that I've disturbed her sleep. Then, I think, fvck it. We're siblings. We do shit like this. She can live with it. I miss her.

"Trent...Hi. You okay?"

"I can't call you to talk?" I grumble.

She laughs quietly, and my chest constricts a little. I've missed that sound. Mom and I were talking two days ago how the house is so much quieter now that Nat's studying abroad. She was always the laughter and energy of the house - more so than me, anyway.

"Say it, you shxthead. Say you miss me."

I say nothing.

"I miss you, Trent," she croons. "There. It's nearly three am here and if I can say those words even after you've fvcked with my sleep, that's saying something."

She's right. A grin inches upon my mouth and I noticed for the first time there's a small crack in my ceiling. "I miss you, Natalie."

"That's what I'm talking about. How are Mom and Darell? How's everyone over there?"

"Mom and Darell are disgustingly in love, the usual. She's happy and he ain't some axshole, so that's a plus for us. Everyone here is good. And...I'm sure you already know, but Cher's back in town and we've kind of been trying to be friends again."

I can practically hear her beaming on the other side. "I'm happy for Mom and Darell - that's how it should be. As for you and Cher, I'm even happier. Lord knows you've both needed to get past your shxt. Don't do anything stupid. I told her the same."

"You and Cher talk about me?" That shouldn't be news to me. That was the thing with our group of friends, secrets were kind of hard to come by. And if we kept anything secretive, then there was always a damn good reason.

Just like my sister didn't need to know that Cheryl Anderson was kind of, lately, you know, turning me the fvck on.

"We talk about everything, Trent. That's what girls do. Anyways, you sure there isn't something else you want to talk about?"

I almost debate telling her the little fiasco with Teagan, but I know she won't appreciate finding out the way she will, so I keep my mouth shut. It's Teagan's thing to say, and it's my job to stand by her while she does. "Nope."

"Trent."

I love my sister to death, but I hate that she has a way to bring out my vulnerable side by simply uttering my name the way she does when she knows something's going wrong. "Nat."

"How are Tara and Oli?"

"I'm sure you and Tara gossip all the time, you probably already know how they're doing. Oli's Oli. Don't even lie. I know you guys text all the time."

"Okay, so tell me how's...Cher?"

Her tone's suspicious to me. It's like she knows something. I narrow my eyes. Jesus, what could she be thinking?

I go for a deflection, like the jerk that I am. "You want any updates on your ex-boyfriend?"

Natalie snorts like she's not even offended by my question. "Yeah, right. Like I care. I see what you're doing here. What's up with Cher?"

Nothing. Nothing is up. Besides the fact that I can't keep my eyes to myself. Soon it'll be my hands. Ah. No. Fvck me. Wait - no. I'm not picturing anyone fvcking - "Jared's dating Cher's roommate. She's like three years younger than him. We don't even know if she's legal yet so Oli and I call her jail -"

"-Jailbait," she whispers, and adds a small laugh. "Yeah, like you guys used to call me. Funny. I'm happy for him. He deserves to find some happiness after everything that happened with Jayden's death. How's he doing lately?"

And suddenly I feel like a total ass for springing this on her. It's not her fault I'm conflicted and don't know how to talk about what I'm feeling. She was nice enough to call me back and I repay her by throwing her failed relationship with my best friend in her face. Nice, Trent. You d!ck. "Look, Nat. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything about Jared. Screw it. Tell me how's Myron. Are you both still...you know?"

My ears are burning, and my face feels hot at the mere thought of my baby sister getting it on with some dude. I think I'm going to barf. One bad deflection with another one. Great, Trent.

"Hooking up? You can say it, Trent." There's a teasing hint in her voice. "Yes, we are. Now, how about we stay away from conversations regarding our relationships. Tell me about football."

I agree and so I do. We chat for a few more minutes. I tell her about my upcoming games and she tells me about her recitals and the fact that she just splurged on some shoes called Loubottoms. Some classic "nude" heel - because, obviously, I know what that means - with red soles. Sounds fvcking dreadful but at least she's happy.

I'm about to hang up but I don't tell her I have plans with Cheryl. Actually, she doesn't know we have plans but I'm about to change that.

"Before I let you go, I should probably let you know I'm coming down for my birthday in November. I'll be spending the weekend with you all."

"Nice, Nat. I can't wait."

"Me neither. I want a big ass cake and a boujee atmosphere. Make it happen."

I laugh. "I got you covered."

"Perfect. 'Night, Trent. Love ya."

"Love you," I mumble, but she's already hung up.

* * *

After hanging up with Nat and completing my assignment, I grab a quick shower and head over to Cher's.

Her building's eerily quiet. I get in easily and take the stairs two steps at a time. She's exiting her room and I catch her shadow.

I approach her calmly. "Cherrycakes."

Half a second later, Cher screams loudly, deafening me in the process.

"Holy shxt!" I wince and lean away from her thunderous shriek. All right so it's almost pitch black in the hallway (and she can't exactly make out my silhouette), but she didn't need to yell like a Banshee in my ear.

"Jesus Christ," I mumble. "You just split my eardrums."

I can hear her panting breaths. The silence drags on for two seconds, before she yells, "Trent?"

I smirk, but she can't see it. "Does anyone else call you Cherrycakes?"

When she doesn't say anything, I move closer to her. She's partially illuminated from the emergency light near us, and I catch the outrage sparking in her eyes. "You didn't think to call? You're aware of this thing called texting. We used to do it all the time. You didn't...I don't know, maybe think of giving me a heads up?"

Not really. No, I didn't. I'd just made it up in my head that I wanted to see her and here I was. "We used to pop up on each other all the time without texting or calling. I didn't think it would be a big deal. Especially since it's Wednesday night. I didn't think you had any plans."

Cher huffs, and her chest rises with the inhale. My eyes are riveted to the modest cleavage revealed by her neckline. "Right. Of course. Because I don't have a life?"

She's suddenly riled up and I try to avert my attention away from her body parts. Look somewhere platonic, Trent. Like her fvcking eyes. "Er, what are you saying?"

She glares a little. "I was going for a walk."

My face falls. "Oh...Sorry."

Cher drags a hand down her face. "Look, I'm sorry. I don't know why I was being a bitch just now and giving you attitude. You caught me off-guard. I've had a long day. How about we go talk that walk together?"

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Like you said, it's Wednesday night and I'm not exactly doing anything. I wouldn't mind your company."

"You wouldn't mind?" I scoff in mock-disgust.

She notices the twinkle in my eyes and grins slowly but surely. "I'd loooooove your company, Trenton."

"Lead the way, babe."

* * *

We walk side by side on the trail crossing through the lot housing the fair. The sound of rides and laughter echo in the distant.

Cher's eyebrows furrow as if she's contemplating something. She hasn't said much since we left her building. Actually, she barely said a word as I drove us to Marnie's Shack to get milkshakes. She was even quieter when I parallel parked between two cars, choosing to get out first and get a head start on the trail.

What's really on her mind? Is it the fair?

She's scrunching up her nose in that way she used to when she's thinking too hard. An old habit of hers.

I angle my head towards the noise. "Did you want to check it out? I can get us a few tickets if you want to ride or play a game."

It's as if there's a lot weighing on her mind. I want her to tell me what's happening.

She shakes her head and takes a sip out of her strawberry milkshake. "Nah."

We're quiet for another moment, letting the silence do the talking between us.

I don't know why I'm keen on disturbing the peace between us. If she wants to talk, she'll talk. I've just forgotten how... refreshing it is to not talk and be heard at the same time.

Cher's always understood that.

It's when we pass a barking dog after fifteen minutes that I finally turn to her and ask, "How are you holding up?"

The color leaves her face and she tenses. Giving me a soft glare, she mutters, "What did Jared tell you?"

I'm confused. "What?"

"You spoke to Jared? Is that it? He promised me he wouldn't -"

She's getting all panicky and an elderly couple walking past us gives us the eyes. "Whoa. Whoa. Back up. What's wrong? What did Jared tell me?"

The full force of her green gaze pins me, and I'm helpless to look away. My throat works with a hard swallow. She's different tonight. It's like she's a ticking time-bomb, about to go off at any moment.

My expression must tell her something because suddenly, she closes her eyes and exhales softly through her nose. "Sorry...I'm...I have a lot on my mind."

"Did Jared do something to you?"

Cher smiles wryly, before linking our arms together and continuing down our path. It's so natural, and yet I'm struck at the simple gesture. I don't remember the last time we held each other like this. "Forget it. I must have confused it with something else."

"Okay." My okay is not really an okay.

"So, how are you keeping up with midterms?"

"I'm dreading them. I haven't started yet."

The thought of locking myself in my place for an entire week to cram my brain with information I'll forget the second I've written my tests makes me shudder a little.

"Oh, yeah? I've already had one for my major classes. I have three more to go and I have so many assignments I'm losing track of where to start and where to finish."

I nod without looking at her. "Did you find it hard adjusting? You know, coming back from Paris to Vancouver?"

Cher licks her lips after taking another sip, and I'm helplessly drawn to her glistening mouth. "If anything, it was harder going to Paris than Vancouver. Over there I was forced to dig into my roots and converse in French on a daily basis. Ordering a breakfast croissant or a café sometimes felt like a chore. Coming home is, well, easy. I grew up here, lived here for three quarters of my life. There wasn't really any adjusting, I guess. I've only been gone for two years."

She's pensive after those words, staring out into the distance. I do the same.

"The only thing I needed adjusting to, well...was you guys," she adds in a little sheepishly.

"Elaborate a little, cherrycakes."

She chuckles - the sound is humourless - then stops herself short. "Everything is so different. It's crazy how twenty-four short months can change everyone. I mean, besides Tara, everyone seems like an altered version of how I left them. But, it's to be expected. I've altered, too."

"You've still got a bit of the girl I remember left in you. Don't think of change as such a bad thing. It's okay to be altered. Life happens. People grow up and move on. I think we've all just evolved."

She smiles at that and her eyes crinkle a little bit at the corners. "You're completely right. It's not a bad thing."

I really like that smile.

We bask in the moment floating between us for a few more seconds as we walk down the asphalt path.

"I just miss it sometimes." She scrunches her nose, then says, "Actually, scratch that. When I was in Paris, I missed you guys all the time. I just, had a hard way of showing it. Jared's still the same guy but it saddens me that he's got such a sombre weight on his shoulder. Jayden's death forced him to mature and sometimes when he talks, it's like he's way beyond his years. Even when he's cracking his lame jokes, his smile is so much more suppressed."

"Yeah," I clear my throat. "And my sister and his relationship didn't help at all."

She shakes her head. "No. Jared fucked up. But Nat's flourishing in NY. Look at her, she's the best version of herself and she's exactly where she belongs."

"Agree," I mutter, suddenly hit with a wave of nostalgia that constricts my chest.

"And..." It's like she can't stop talking about the past, she's got this curve to her mouth but sad, glinting eyes. "Tara's still the same, too, but I think Quent passing away really screwed with her head. I mean, it screwed with all of our heads. Mine, too," she adds more quietly. "But while Tara's still playing the fun-loving bad girl, her armors chipped. But she does a damn good job at hiding it."

"You know what's crazy, Cher?" I fold my arms behind my neck and stretch. "I went over to her place a couple of months ago to give her mom something my mom wanted her to have, and when I walked into Tara's room, I caught her crying. She was listening to the old mixtapes Quentin had made for her. You know, the one with the corny and cheesy songs for prom?"

"Oh my God. My heart."

"Even at Quent's funeral she held it together, but this was the first time in a decade that I caught her sobbing aloud with fat, ugly tears rolling down her face. Really broke me to see her like that."

Cher shakes her head as if to erase the sad thoughts that come with the mention of Quentin. She can't. Just like I can't ease the tightness in my lungs. "If you told me this a few years ago, I'd have a hard time believing it. But you're right; it's crazy. I guess for Tara, he's kind of like the one that got away. She knew Quent was crazy for her; she just never felt that way for him but she tried hard. And...While she was trying hard, he suddenly passed away. She called him her "shoulda, coulda, woulda" as a joke, but I know she fiercely meant it."

"Life happens," I conclude.

She's murmurs an absentmindedly, "Yeah."

"Then there's Oliver and Teagan. A fvcking train wreck of a mess."

She rolls her eyes. "Literally, Trent. Every time I think of them, my head actually hurts. Teagan barely talks to us, let alone breathes a word about Oliver. It's like she went to Boston and put distance between herself and Oliver but allowed the gap between the rest of us to grow as well. And Oliver? My, god. The other day he was over and he had my phone in his hand when it beeped. I asked him who it was. And you know what he told me?"

"What?"

"He said so indifferently, 'You have a text from the bxtch'. When I realized it was Teagan, I actually punched him in the shoulder. I knew things between them went down all ugly, but I didn't think he'd call her a fvcking bxtch. I was so dumbfounded. It's been two years. Like, you have a girlfriend now. You're happy. Why still act like that?"

I grit my teeth. If he'd ever called her a bxtch in front of my face, I would have beat the ever-loving daylights out of him. Best friend or not. "Because he's still hanging on to the hurt. I saw - ah, I spoke to Teagan on the phone not too long ago. We were talking about, um, something I don't remember, but anyways, she mentioned something to me. She said Oliver thinks she's a whore. I saw red. So, I'm not even surprised about the bxtch comment."

"Such a disappointment," she clucked her tongue. "I expected better from his. Inga is gorgeous and so sweet to him. He's got no reason to think of Teagan like that. You said so yourself, life happens."

I gaze out into the night sky, my eyes fixed on a clutter of stars.

Cher and I are here. But I'm wondering if right now, the rest of us - Jared, Tara, Oliver, Nat and Teagan in their respective places, and...even Quentin - can see what I'm seeing tonight?

A handful of stars, scattered in the night sky, bounded so close, yet so far away from each other.

A mirror image of us. So close yet our altered states keeping us at different distances.

We've talked about everyone. The wave of nostalgia that's still riding through me forces me to look at her. "Then there's us," I utter with a grin.

Cher looks a little confused, the skin between her brows pinching once more. "Us?"

"Yeah."

She smiles a little more brightly when she understands what I mean. That smile, I'm really, really beginning to like it. "I guess there's always been an us, eh, Treasure Chest?"

I can't help the dazed grin that kicking up the corners of my mouth.

She's got no fvcking idea.

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