" So what reminded you of us?!!" I shouted at my brother.

I haven't seen Hassan in a year, he couldn't handle our father's death well at all, so he broke loose.

He began to party wildly, drink and do drugs. He would come home drunk and when my mother tried to talk some sense into him he would push her and even beat her, I've also got my share of being beaten by him.

Untill we decided that we had had enough of his antics.

So we gave him the choice, either return to the path of Allah or leave, so he left.

I can't say I wasn't sad when he left, but as the time passed I grew to hate him, he left us alone with no man, no protection to hide behind. We were so vulnerable, exposed to every danger, we needed him so bad and he just left. He should have carried on the legacy of our father but instead he became a disgrace to his name. I didn't think I could forgive him.

" Son " mum shouted in surprise " come in ".

" I can't believe you are gonna let him in so easily like this mum, after all what he has done to you, after all what he has done to us " I shouted.

I tried to close the door in his face, but my mum stopped me.

" Stop it Jannah " mum said.

" I can't believe you mum, he shows up and you just forgive him like this " I said to her, angerily.

" I missed you all " he said in a fake tone of affection.

" We missed you too son, come in " mum replied with tears in her eyes.

" Okay that's it I'm going upstairs, because I can't stand the sight of you" I shouted at them.

I went upstairs not believing how easy my mum forgot all about what Hassan has done. She always said before that she considers him dead!!! What's wrong with her?!! I guess mothers' affection, something I will never understand untill I become one myself.

But still, the question that I couldn't answer was what brought him back to us after all these years?!! Repentance?!!! I highly doubt that.

" Whatever the reason is, I hope it's good " I said to myself.

After about 30 minutes of speaking like a crazy to myself, my mum came into my room.

" He left?!!!" I asked her angerily.

" Yes, calm down " she answered.

" See, he didn't come to stay. What did he want?!! Maybe he wanted money to buy him some drugs ?!!" I asked.

" No, Jannah " my mum said sternly.

" I'm sorry, I just can't believe how easily you let him in after all what he had done?!!! " I explained.

" I'm a mother, Jannah, you won't know how it feels, I missed him everyday " she said with tears in her eyes.

" Oh mum, don't cry " I said hugging her.

After a couple of minutes of trying to stop my mother from strating a crying session.

" Then why did he come?!!" I asked her.

" It's about you!! " my mum said.

" About me!! What do you mean?!!" I said in confusion.

" There is somebody who...who wants to marry you!! " mum responded in hesitance.

I was silent for about five minutes. I was shocked. I didn't even consider marriage at that time.

" Marriage...me...now " I mumbeled.

" Yes, Jannah, marriage, you are not young anymore, you are graduating this year in shaa Allah, and you need a man to take care of you " she explained.

" But what about my dreams!! going to the university!!! " I said.

" Jannah, I want you to have everything in the world, but I don't think we can afford it " she explained.

I was watching my dreams crumbling in front of my eyes, I didn't know what to say. But I still had one answered question.

" Who, mum?!!" I asked her.

" Your teacher.....Mr Zayn Ahmed" she answered.

It was like being hit by a bolt of lightning,

" Mr Zayn " I mumbeled.

" Yes Mr Zayn, he is a Muslim, has a good job and a good family and from what I heard he is good looking too " she explained.

" But he is my teacher " I said.

" It's not important, he is about four years older than you, he is still young " she answered.

Finally and unfortunately I had my answer to his unexplained attention to me exclusivly, he wanted to marry me!!!

But I gotta say I respect the fact that he came to speak to my family first.

" Jannah, think about it, make your own decision, I can't force you, but you should know that this a good opportunity and you should seize it " she explained leaving the room.

Of course that day I couldn't study well, I was lost in my thoughts, trying to figure out the pros and cons of each choice.

I mean Mr Zayn is an extremely good looking person, any girl would be flattered if he gave her one look, with a good job and a good family and most importantly he is a good Muslim, there weren't many Muslims where I lived, so it was a good opportunity.

But still, I never had any feelings for him, he was just my teacher, I never looked at him the way other girls did, and I still have dreams after school, I've always dreamt about going to Harvard, I knew we couldn't afford it but I still dreamt about it.

The next day at school I didn't have chemistry, Alhamdullah, otherwise it would have been really awkward facing Mr Zayn.

At lunch I was sitting alone minding my own business, when - of course - James showed up.

" Helloooo princess, I'm really sorry about yesterday " he said.

He seemed to be in a really good mood, on the contrary I wasn't.

" James, just stop " I said to him in an ordering tone.

" Okay sorry sorry, I won't call you princess again, hello Jannah, are you still really mad at me for yesterday!! " he said .

" It's not about that, just stop hanging around me " I explained sternly.

" What, what do you mean?!!" He said in shock.

" I don't think it's a good idea to speak to you publicly in school " I said.

" What...why?!!" He sounded really confused.

" James, this is not going anywhere, just leave me alone " I said.

" Why Jannah?!! I thought we were friends !!" He said.

" Not any more " I explained.

" Is it that zayn Ahmed you like?!! " he said angerily.

I didn't know that it was that obvious untill he said it.

" Maybe " I said, I gotta admit I was trying to tease him too.

" Great, I knew it, so he is your secret boyfriend?!!" He said angerily.

" It's not like that James, we Muslims don't do this " I responded trying to defend myself.

" We...Muslims, you never spoke to me like this before " he said in shock.

" Yes James...we Muslims, in case you forgot, we are different James, from two different worlds, what is allowed in your culture is forbidden in mine " I explained.

" Okay....okay I'm sorry, I apologise " he said in defeat.

After a moment of awkward silence, finally, he finally spoke

" So you chose him over me?!!" He asked.

" It's not like that.......it's different.... James....I'm marrying him " I said.

I didn't know why I told him........