Tyler and Josh were sitting on the couch, silently waiting for the TV to load. Tyler had his knees pulled to his chest and was still shaking. His eyes were closed, but Josh knew that they were red.

Tyler interrupted the quiet. "I used to hate you."

Josh turned to him. "That's understandable."

Tyler shook his head. "No, it's not. I didn't want to hate you, but I- I needed someone to blame, y'know? And I was scared. I was so scared." He paused and averted his eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing. "But I'm not anymore. Not as much, anyway. And I don't hate you. I'm sorry that I did."

"You don't have to be sorry for that," Josh whispered. "I'd be surprised if you didn't hate me."

Tyler smiled, just slightly. "You're fucking awesome, dude. No one should hate you. You're, like, the nicest person in the world."

Josh flinched at Tyler's wording. "I wouldn't be so sure about that."

"I am completely sure that you have never done something so bad that it's not worth forgiveness," Tyler replied.

Josh looked up. "Really?"

Tyler turned to him, his eyes sparkling. "Definitely."

Josh smiled. "Thanks. And, if it means anything, I don't think you've done anything terrible, either."

"Thanks," Tyler laughed.

Josh sighed and leant his head back. "Seriously, though. You don't know half of the shit I've been part of. Half of the shit I've done."

"You can tell me," Tyler said quietly. "I won't judge you or anything."

Josh shook his head. "There's so much- so much bad, and I just- I can't. There's so much death and violence that I've been around. That I've been responsible for. How do you come back from that?"

Tyler didn't reply. It was like he was waiting for Josh to say more; to offer context. To list examples.

Josh exhaled shakily. "You know why I'm here, right? Why I had to escape?"

Tyler shrugged. "Angry Russians?"

Josh chuckled dryly. "Yeah, I guess. They would- they would kidnap me, basically, and hold me for ransom or something. They'd use me to threaten my dad. Usually, he'd send someone to rescue me, but there was this one time..." he paused, his voice leaving him. "There was this one time that he didn't come. I was with them for weeks, barely surviving."

"How'd you get out?" Tyler asked gently.

Josh blinked away the tears forming in his eyes. "I- I fought. I didn't- I didn't want to hurt any of them, not really, but they had hurt me so bad. I was angry, and I- I lost control. I didn't mean to do it, Tyler, I swear. You have to believe me. I never meant hit him so hard."

Tyler didn't need to ask to know what Josh was talking about. He just smiled sadly and nodded, his eyes displaying the full trust and belief that he had in Josh.

"I still have nightmares about it," Josh mumbled. "The torture, the beatings, everything that hurt me... none of that was as bad as taking another person's life, even if it was an accident."

Tyler pulled him in for a hug. "You're a good person," he whispered into his ear.

Josh wiped his eyes. "Thank you."

Tyler nodded and playfully ruffled Josh's hair, making the older laugh and swat his hand away.

Tyler was always an impulsive person. He made constant split second decisions; whether they were big or small. They were almost always bad decisions, too, but it was what he wanted to do, and sometimes he couldn't stop himself. Even if he got hurt, or someone else did, he never learned. It was like he couldn't control himself, like something was possessing him to do such daring, risky acts. He hated it with his entire heart, but he never stopped. Maybe that was why he was suddenly leaning forward, and looking into Josh's eyes, and his lips were meeting his before Tyler could even process what was happening.

Tyler pulled away and gently touched his fingers to his lips. "I can't believe I just did that."

Josh's eyes were wide. He was frozen in shock, unable to speak. His lips were tingling and he felt like he was about to throw up his own heart.

Tyler got up from the couch. "I'm so sorry."

He ran to his room, leaving Josh to sit on the couch in complete and utter shock. He looked at the TV, which was finally on and, obviously, playing Supernatural. He blinked, finally snapping out of his trance, and inhaled sharply. What the fuck just happened?