step by step by step, i watch my shoes brush the cold gray c o n c r e t e, washed with waves of snow, like a ocean.

the park, once a g a r d e n, is now a .

i listen to the wistful t u n e s of (of wind, and lonely days in a evermore forest) as i walk through the jungle. the dreary sky is s t r e a k e d with colorless stains of pastel paints, at with fingers of an artist into a pretty expanse of .

my scarf wraps me in a g e n t l e sensation, of something melancholy. something warm, but . like you.

like you. like you, auburn. you're so from me. you're always g o n e these days. and when you're close, i keep pushing you away. you're like a in winter, r a r e and as f l e e t i n g these december afternoons, of lone walks in this of a city, of a city that broke me. listening to the crying w i n d and the lyrics of bon iver.

and then, through the , through the , through the pale air, a different sound fills my v e i n s. the sound of your voice, unexpectedly,

/ auburn's pov /

there's a strange pain in

my chest, like heartburn

the aches of

memories

hurt more these days

it hurts even just to think these days

(but i think all the time)

images F-F-FLASH in my head

shadows falling down cliffs

cliffs

(falling) cliffs

(down) cliffs

cliffs

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

im scared of falling im scared of falling

[ fading from my head,

back to the present ]

it's as if i'm breaking through

the water as my eyes see again,

event though they were open.

i'm zoning out a lot these days.

i look up, and that's

when i see her. roselin.

she's walking

alone through the

cold, lonely park.

i don't see her often,

nowadays. the last time

was 3 days ago in the

library. i'm glad to

see her again, right

when i need to.

she's wearing a

&

b i g e

colored

coat &

r

d

scarf

is wrapped around

her neck, a streak of

crimson holding her

around the shoulders.

her black hair

streaks past her

face and over

her shoulders

like

waved lines in

the concrete,

a pretty streak of

paint in the snow.

/ roselin's pov /

"roselin,"

i look up. you're sitting on the frosty bench, like you were that d a y. i if you'd been zoning out again. it's a surprise to see you here, right as i was thinking about you.

"auburn,"

you stand, walking towards me. even from here i can that your eyes are e m p t y. there are dark circles under your eyes, like from the remembering of the dead.

"can i walk with you?"

"alright..."

our words bloom white in the crisp w i n t e r air when we speak. together, we continue down the path in silence.

winter birds sing softly, mournfully. winter. why are you so sad?

"auburn,"

"hmm?"

"why have you been skipping school?"

the trees stand still, like . the flowers are no longer d a n c i n g in autumn breezes. (they haven't for months.) but even then, it's as if the ghosts of them haunt this place, this cold place.

you don't look at me, or answer, for a long time. i watch the dull sky as we walk in silence.

"i just don't feel like going,"

"oh... alright,"

in the background, my music plays at low volume. like . whispers of a past wind, a b y g o n e wind.

"what are you listening to?"

"bon iver,"

"oh i remember, you said you liked roslyn, right?"

"i do. what type of songs do you listen to?"

you smile at me, warmth creeping into your hazy eyes.

"i like lana del rey and mehro,"

"you have great song taste,"

"you really think so?"

"yeah,"

"do you listen to jazz?"

"no, not really,"

your hair hangs over your like garden s w i n g s, blowing from an invisible . something dreamy fades into your , as if you were zoning out into a bygone m e m o r y. it takes root into your voice and into your next words,

"i love jazz, especially piano jazz. you know, there's a jazz concert tomorrow night at the cafe, do you want to meet there?"

the lie comes from somewhere deep inside me. so deep that i can't see where it's from. i still wonder... why? why?

"no... i'm busy tomorrow, sorry,"

"oh okay..."

why do i keep holding you at arms length? we were once close before weren't we?

you smile, your empty eyes softening. it makes me feel something, something endearingly and endlessly , like listening to bon iver walking in this barren, graveyard with y o u. there's nothing but friendliness in your eyes, but i feel the same as whenever i look at you.

"whether you come or not, i'll be there at 9:42,"

( we reach the park gates. we part ways.)

🌙