Dipper was in the forest when he turned the camera on.

He had a rather serious expression on his face.

"Welcome back to Dipper's guide to the unexplained" he said, as he held up a new cardboard sign. "Anomaly number fifty four: the mailbox."

He turned the camera so that it was facing the rather peculiar mailbox.

Its age was exemplified by the rust and moss hanging off from it, and yet it was a rather strange place for a mailbox to be placed.

"There it is, in the middle of the forest. No house, no address..." Dipper was saying. "Today, me and my team of experts..."

Soos and (y/n) both stepped into view of the camera. While (y/n) was wearing her normal attire, Soos was wearing a labcoat with a pair of goggles over his eyes.

"Sup" Soos greeted, as he held up a hand.

(y/n) simply pointed at the camera and clicked her tongue in a bored tone.

"...are going to put a letter into the mailbox, and see who picks it up."

Soos held up the letter.

"My letter possets a salient question: 'sup, dawg."

And with that, he placed the letter into the mailbox, and slammed it shut.

"Now we're going to hide behind a bush and wait until..."

"Uh, dude?" said Soos, as his voice started to rise with worry.

Suddenly, the mailbox started to shake violently, its flag rising as well until it finally reached the top. Once it did, the mailbox stopped vibrating.

There was a long pause before any of them spoke.

"Did you see that?" said Soos, clutching his hat in an anxious manner.

Dipper put the camera down, then hurried up to the mailbox with Soos and (y/n).

"Open it" he whispered.

"No, you open it, dude" Soos insisted. "I'm not touching a ghost mailbox!"

(y/n) sighed, and pushed them both to the side.

"Just move out of the way" she said. "I'll open it."

She cautiously held out her arm, and opened the mailbox.

Everyone cringed at first, expecting the worst to pop out at them.

But nothing happened.

Instead, (y/n) reached in and pulled out a rather aged letter, with a red seal that had the infinity symbol stamped onto it.

"What?" exclaimed Soos. "That's not our letter!"

Dipper gingerly took the letter out of (y/n)'s hands, and opened it himself.

His eyes widened in shock when he saw the words that were written on the paper.

Soos and (y/n) read it over his shoulder as well.

"Hello Dipper, (y/n), and Soos?" said Soos, his voice rising with anxiety and surprise.

"It knows our names!" said Dipper.

"No. Way" said (y/n). "How is that even possible?"

"What if this thing's all-knowing?" Soos inquired.

"We've gotta test it."

Soos held up the new letter to the camera.

"What did I shave into my head this morning?"

He walked up to the mailbox, placed his letter inside, and slammed it shut.

As the mailbox started to shake, Soos took a step back, but didn't panic this time.

When it stopped shaking and the flag was fully raised, Soos opened the mailbox and took out the new letter.

"A baby duck holding a paddle ball."

His eyes widened in shock.

"Dude, it knew!"

He turned around, and took off his hat, revealing to the camera the baby duck holding a paddle ball shaved onto the back of his head.

"What?!" exclaimed Dipper.

"Ask it more questions!"

"When is the end of the world?" Dipper read aloud, as he put his letter into the mailbox.

After the mailbox was finished shaking, Dipper took out the new letter.

"3012" he said in disbelief. "Huh. We've got a while."

"Who is my dream woman?" Soos asked, as he placed his letter into the mailbox.

The mailbox shook for a bit, before finally stopping.

Soos opened it, and took the new letter.

"Whoa ho! Hot tamales!"

He showed the camera a picture of a rather muscular woman wearing an American bikini.

He then rolled up the picture, and shoved it into his lab pocket.

"Save that one for the archives."

"What does the future have in store?" (y/n) read aloud, as she placed her letter into the mailbox and slammed it shut.

The mailbox only shook for a few seconds, before its flag raised and it stopped vibrating once again.

(y/n) reached in, and took out the new letter.

"You and your husband will cease to exist temporarily, and your kids almost destroy the fabric of time."

She looked up from the letter with a rather joyous expression on her face.

"I'm so proud of them already!"

Dipper was now holding up a pen and paper as he thought about what question to write down next.

"Uh, what is the exact time and date of my death?" he said out loud "Or, what is the meaning of life?"

Soos and (y/n) were both shouting their own questions over him.

"Did aliens build the pyramids?"

"Will I invent something that threatens to destroy the universe?"

"What are marshmallows made of?"

"How many times will I get sent to prison?"

Suddenly, Dipper was struck with an idea.

"Who wrote journal number three?"

Soos and (y/n) both seemed to agree.

"Who wrote the journal! Who wrote the journal!"

Dipper grinned excitedly.

"We're finally going to get the answer to the greatest mystery in Gravity Falls!"

But before he could even write down the new question, Mabel suddenly appeared beside the mailbox, holding a small package.

"Nifty mailbox!" she said. "I've been waiting to mail Mom this video of me sticking a hundred gummy worms up my nose!"

(y/n) groaned.

"We get it, Mabel, you've got flexible nose cartilage."

Mabel reached over towards the mailbox, package in hand.

Dipper's eyes widened,

"Wait, no!"

But it was too late, for Mabel had already shoved the package into the mailbox, and slammed it shut.

"Blam!"

Suddenly, the mailbox started to shake once again, and when it finally stopped, Dipper opened the mailbox and read the new letter.

"Your gummy worm video has disturbed and insulted me" he read aloud. "You fools are unworthy of my great knowledge. The era of human enlightenment shall never come to pass."

Suddenly, the mailbox started to glow a bright blue color, and it seemed relatively unstable.

"Uh, what's that?" said Soos, his voice rising with panic.

The triplets all screamed, and bolted in three separate directions, away from the mailbox as it started to crumple itself in midair, and disappear in a blue explosion.

The four of them were now standing in front of the smoking hole where the mailbox had once been. They all looked terrible.

Soos's shirt and lab coat had been mostly blown off.

Dipper's hat was shifted to the side, he was missing a sleeve, and half of his vest had been blown off.

(y/n)'s bandana had been half blasted off, her ponytail was sticking straight out to one side, and she was missing one of her cargo boots.

Mabel's hair was blown to the side, she had a hole on one of her sweater sleeves, and she was missing one of her mary jane shoes.

"Well, that concludes Dipper's guide to the unexplained" said Dipper, as he turned towards Mabel with an irritated expression on his face.

"Where we learned that when dealing with the unknown, do not mail videos of you shoving gummy worms up your nose!"

Mabel grinned, and took out a huge ball of gummy worms.

"There's more where that came from!" she said, as she held up one of the gummy worms to her nose.

"Into my nose! Into my nose!"

Dipper's eyes widened, and he ran up to the camera to shut it off.

"No, show over! Show over!!!!!"

_______________________________

The next episode, "Dipper's Guide to the Unexplained: Stan's Tattoo," is currently scheduled for release 6/9/18 unless otherwise posted. Thank you for your dedication