I stare at the matchmaking folders on my desk, trying to summon some semblance of interest. It's not working. I'm miserable, and no matter how many new matches I make, I can't escape the giant void in my soul.

Since being back, my matchmaking mojo seems to have returned, and I'm making every match assigned to me with little to no trouble. It's like the last decade of constant failure never happened. If not for the hollowness in my chest threatening to engulf me. I miss her so much it hurts.

I even miss the furry miscreants. Before leaving the mortal realm, I gifted them to Penelope's nephew, so at least I know they have a wonderful home. Hopefully, Penelope is doing well too. I've resisted the temptation to check in on her. The deadline for matching her with Trevor has come and gone, and I have not been demoted, so they must be together. As much as I take some comfort in knowing she has her happily ever after, I don't want to see it. I don't think I can watch her happily in love with another man.

"Why so gloomy?"

I look up from my desk to stare at Fate. She rarely comes to the Cupid quarters, and seeing her here is nothing short of astonishing. This is the second time she's sought me out in the last few months. First in that bar with Andris, and again now.

"I think you know," I mutter, in no mood to play her games.

"Missing your human?" She sits down on my desk, absently rifling through a few papers. With a frown, I take them from her before she messes up my system.

"My human?" I grunt. "She's not a lost puppy."

Fate smirks. "I'm aware. How is she doing?"

I stare down at my papers. "How would I know? She's obviously matched with Trevor, or I'd be wearing horns by now. The full decade has gone."

It's difficult to imagine it's been five months since I saw her. It feels like a century, at least. Immortality has never seemed less appealing. What's the point of eternity if you face it alone? I scowl, not liking the direction my thoughts are heading.

"You haven't been tempted to at least peek?"

"No." Yes.

"Well, I have."

My head snaps back up to stare at her. I don't want to ask. I don't want to know. But at the same time... I desperately do.

"You might be surprised," she says casually as she holds her hand out to inspect her fingernails. I'm not fooled. She's definitely up to something.

"Spill," I demand.

Fate turns her head to look at me, her amber eyes watching me thoughtfully. "She misses you."

I try to keep my face even, not wanting to betray how much those words hurt. I miss her too. So damn much.

"And Trevor?" I hate that I asked.

"Is happily in love."

I bring a folder out and pretend to read it, finished with this conversation.

"With someone else."

Grinding my teeth together, I slam the folder down on my desk and level Fate with a glare. "You don't think you could have lead with that?"

A smile plays across her lips. "I could have, but it wouldn't have been nearly as fun."

"How is that possible?" Without thinking, my hand flies to my face to make sure I haven't grown horns without noticing. Thankfully, I haven't.

"I got them demoted to a non-essential match."

"But it was over eighty percent."

"There was another match that was higher."

My chest feels tight. "How high?"

"In the thousands."

I frown. "You can't go above one-hundred percent. That's not how math works."

"Correction." She smiles. "That's not how human math works." When I only stare at her, she rolls her eyes. "I forget you used to be human. Your minds are so limited."

By now my eyes might be ready to pop out of my head. "Ignoring that insult... What? I used to be human?"

"Most Cupids did. Nearly everyone around here, really." She shrugs. "Not me, of course. Nor the Gods. But most of you workers."

"Why don't I remember being human?" I'm still reeling from the shock and can't help but wonder if this was how Penelope felt when she discovered Cupids existed.

"You all tend to forget after a few centuries. Usually, this is your end destination, but occasionally you get another lifetime as a mortal."

My mouth is suddenly dry. "How?"

The shadow of a smile touches her lips. I'm trying to not seem too keen, but she can see straight through me. "Well, usually by earning it. Some of you need to learn a lesson before going for another one. Then you can be reborn."

Reborn? Any distant hopes I had of a future with Penelope instantly plummet again. It's no help to me if I return as a baby.

"Why is this not common knowledge?" I ask, surprised never to have heard about it before.

"If people know they have a lesson to learn, they rarely learn it. And we don't want anyone asking for another mortal life. Some souls have finished their journey, and it's easier not having to deny them."

Remembering what she was saying before I got sidetracked by the revelation that I used to be human, I look at her. "How did they never match? Even as a non-essential match, that's a high percentage."

"It was all Trevor."

I blink. All Trevor? "What do you mean?"

She looks at me like I'm an idiot. "It was all Trevor. Every single percent. That match would never happen. Penelope doesn't match to him at all, while he matches very high with her. Funny, really. It's almost unheard of."

My fingers around a stack of papers clench and unclench. "And yet you were happy to let me keep trying to match them? Despite knowing it would never happen?" My voice turns hard with anger. "I asked you about it several times, and you assured me everything was as it should!"

"I needed you to be involved."

"Why? Did you need some amusement in your sad, lonely existence?"

Her eyes turn hard, and her mouth tightens for a moment before she relaxes again. I guess I hit a nerve. "Don't lash out," she scolds me, but her voice is softer than I would have expected. "You're the other match, you dummy."

"I'm... the other match." I have to repeat it to believe it. Once the words sink in, they make sense. It explains so much. The inexorable pull I feel to Penelope. How she wasn't affected by Andris's aura. How did I not see it? I've been so blind.

"Yes," Fate says, as if she can read my mind. "You and Penelope are one of the best matches I've ever seen. No other match was ever going to happen."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

She shakes her head. "You know why. Telling a match is usually a sure-fire way of making sure it doesn't happen. I still can't believe you told Penelope."

"She was onto me."

"Maybe deep down you didn't want her with Trevor."

I didn't. I probably never did. Not really. She fascinated me from the moment I first laid eyes on her, and spending time with her in the mortal realm had made me fall for her quicker than anything.

"So Steve was never really the issue." The comment is more for me than Fate, but she laughs.

"Well, no. But I used him to spy on you at times."

For the first time, I see the likeness between the cat's amber eyes and Fate's. I'm not sure whether to laugh or admonish her for spying.

"But a match between a Cupid and a human..." I shake my head.

"Another thing basically unheard of," Fate confirms. "And it poses certain issues."

I nod. "What can I do?"

"Normally, anyone going back for another lifetime would start afresh, but considering the circumstances, I think we could make an exception." She meets my gaze, her face serious. "You will have to agree to forfeit whatever years you're missing by appearing at your current age. Well, something reasonable in humans years. No one wants to see a mortal with your actual age. You will live out your life as a mortal, and you will die as a mortal. Then your soul will return here, where you continue your work as a Cupid."

"I'll do it."

A smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. "I'm not finished. There are a few considerations."

"Whatever they are, I'll do it."

My eagerness makes her laugh again. "Look," she says, still smiling. "It's nothing bad. I just want you to know that you will retain your memories, so you have to be careful with what you say during your time in the mortal realm. You will not be working as a Cupid, but like when you took mortal form to match Penelope and Trevor, you will keep some of your abilities. Normally, this wouldn't be a thing, but since you're not starting over as a newborn, this is how we have to do it."

"I'm in."

"Just in case this would happen—" The way she says it indicates she fully expected it would. "—I took the liberty of keeping your apartment across from Penelope's. Your bank accounts and social security are still intact as well."

"Thank you." I stand up, and before she can react, I've pulled her into a big bear hug. She stiffens. No one touches Fate. But today. Today I'm touching Fate. She relaxes in my embrace and awkwardly pats my back.

"That's enough now," she says, her voice a little strained.

I release her and take a step back. I'm ready. Now I just have to pray that I can convince Penelope to take me back.