Pulling my unruly hair up in a high ponytail, I speed walked towards the operation rooms with a black elastic stuck between my teeth. The beeping noise of my pager was enough to tell me there was an emergency, and since I was still on the on-call shift, I had to be present. Before I knew it, I was washing my hands feverishly, scrubbing hard and fast.

The minute I stepped in the cold operation room, my breath hitched in my throat as I saw the person on the table. A young girl, not older than fifteen, vomiting blood uncontrollably. The fear was present in her eyes, as she couldn't concentrate on anything happening around her, just kept trying to keep the blood from spilling out of her mouth. I was in scrubs the next moment and not a second later, the girl was out, courtesy of the anesthesiologist.

As a surgical intern my role was merely assisting the head surgeons while they tried to save the young patient. Pretty much straight forward, but everything was so hectic, everything happened so fast... She was crushing, when I was pushed at the back so they could proceed with chest compressions. I couldn't take my eyes off her, when Dr. Marshall called my name.

"Ricci, I want you focused. Hold this..." He handed the retractor to me and rushed to the other side. "Page Dr. Krieg in here. I need Krieg in this OR now."

Everything is over, I kept repeating to myself while lathering my hands with soap and rubbing the skin frantically. I felt the tears run down my cheeks even though I was trying to control the sobs from escaping my throat. I wasn't sure why I was crying. The patient survived and, although she was still at risk, she was going to recover fully. Still, I couldn't stop myself from rubbing the skin under my palms, or the tears that kept flowing.

"Erika..."

I kept scrubbing, the water beginning to burn.

"Erika?"

But I couldn't stop. I kept rubbing and I kept crying.

"Erika stop this!"

Stella pulled me away from the sink, closing the faucet, before she turned my almost limp body towards her, crushing me in her arms. She was warm, but nothing like the burning sensation of the water. I was quiet, but I could still feel the tears running down my wet cheeks. Feeling my knees getting weaker, Stella pulled me towards a bench in front of the lockers, still holding me in her arms.

"What happened?"

What really happened? Why was I breaking apart?

And then it dawned on me. Everything that happened the past few days. Brandon King, the bruises on his skin, the secrets that weren't mine, but my curiosity wanted to claim. A dreadful feeling in my gut and an unknown man that had me in a death grip, no sign of remorse in his eyes while he was for sure plotting in his head how to hurt me... The man that saved me, but kept me in the dark; I wasn't deemed worthy of knowing why I was attacked. Why he was going to be attacked. And the little girl on the operation room table, vomiting her insides, pleading with her eyes for help.

Why was I breaking apart?

I'm not sure if Stella understood the words that came out of my mouth. Hell, if I was in her place, I would think my best friend was losing her mind. But she listened, held me in her arms. At some point she pulled me even closer, whispering soothing words to me, that everything was going to be alright and that he was gone now. I didn't know who she meant, but no one would hurt me. I was safe.

I wasn't a damsel in distress. I didn't want to be safe because he kept his distance. I wanted to feel safe because he was near, and he trusted me, and he wanted to share his world with mine and he...

He was already gone, and I had to get over it.

Once Stella deemed that I was ready to face the world, she pulled me on my feet. Washing my face with cold water to sooth the puffy skin, I made the mistake of looking at myself in the mirror. What a great mistake that was. I could barely recognize myself, but it didn't matter in that moment. My shift was already over, which meant I could go home and rest.

Realizing rounds were already over, I pulled Stella towards the conference room for the daily meeting.

"You don't have to. They already know your shift was over." She said, worry plastered on her face.

"I know, but I still want to know what happened to the little girl. Besides, I was the on-call doctor. I need to give my report." She nodded once, although I knew she wanted me to get home as soon as possible.

Reaching for the reports I worked on last night, I red the inpatient list. No Brandon Anthony King on the list; he was already discharged. I frowned for a moment, but then remembered the promise I made myself. He wasn't part of my plans and that's how it was supposed to be.

"That's the new intern, right?" Stella asked Markus once he stood next to us in the conference room. She pointed and I followed her action to observe the tall stranger at the other side of the room.

"That's the Jaxon Inkles, I was telling you about. He seems like a cool guy, but I guess only time will tell..."

My mind muted their conversation while I kept looking at him. His hair was pulled back in a messy bun, showcasing the firm lines of his jaw. He was talking to another intern, when a few strands of hair fell loose from his bun, framing his face and making him look gentle. But I was mistaken, because the minute he averted his gaze and stared into my eyes, I was met with his steely blue and there was nothing gentle about them. Shivers run down my spine and on instinct I moved closer to my twin, as if to hide away from the stranger's piercing gaze. I couldn't shake the feeling that the storm behind those eyes seemed familiar.

"How do you know everything?" Stella asked, nudging his shoulder.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out, piccola!"

My eyes widened at their exchange and I bit my lip hard to stop my chuckling. I couldn't believe how smooth my brother was. Their back and forth banter had picked my interest, especially Stella's uncontrollable blushing, and so I didn't feel the urge to look at the new intern again.

The meeting thankfully didn't last long and the minute we were out of the room my brother ushered me home to get some rest. "You look like shit." His words were always full of love. "Get some rest before Nelle's party tonight."

How could I forget? Now that was something I wasn't looking forward to. Not one bit. Not even just a little.

The plan was simple. Take a quick shower and sleep. But the moment I walked through the door, I knew the plan was never intended for success. I failed miserably once again the minute I was alone with my thoughts; they came crushing down on me. It was asphyxiating.

Moments like these I did the only thing that could take my mind off everything. And without even realizing, minutes turned into hours as I kept repeating the steps of the same recipe that kept me almost sane.

I pushed my hair away from my face with the back of my hand, frustration clouding my actions. My forehead was colored white by now, courtesy of the powdered sugar, or the flour; both were equal rivals at this point. It was probably ridiculous, but in that moment I didn't care. In that moment I just wanted to finish the fourth bunch of cannoli before the humans I called roommates came crushing through that front door, bombarding me with questions I didn't have an answer to.

This was what I always did when I couldn't deal with my feelings, a habit I got from my mom ever since I was little. Feeling content with the current stillness of the kitchen, I eyed the first and second bunch of perfectly baked cannoli; my Italian ancestors should be proud of me. I started pumping the filling in the beautifully made pastries, deciding I would take some at tonight's party. I went overboard with the amount I baked. Still, diabetes wasn't one of the things I was looking forward to in my future. Besides, if there was something doctors couldn't refuse, it was sweets and pastries.

I was dusting powdered sugar on the second bunch, when I heard the front door being unlocked, before two smiley faces came in the kitchen. I could tell they weren't expecting to find me awake, because the minute they saw me Stella pulled her hand away from Markus' strong hold. I bit down on a smirk trying to appear on my face. Stella's blushing face told me everything I wanted to know.

"Whoa... Eri?" My brother's mouth hang wide open once he saw the assortment of sweets covering the countertop. "Is everything alright?"

Damn it!

He knew what baking meant. They both did. I should have teased them when I had the chance. Now all attention is on me. Damn it, damn it, damn it.

They approached the counter slowly, hands held in front of them to protect themselves in case I was going to attack. Like a wild lion ready to pounce on its prey, or more like a feral kitty cat ready to show her nails in case they overstepped their line.

"Eri? You know you can tell us anything, right?" I sighed at his pleading eyes, but I wasn't ready to share my internal turmoil right now. Instead I opted for the next best option when I pushed a perfectly made cannoli with ricotta filling in front of him, doing the same to Stella.

"Here." I turned around to fill two cups of warm, freshly brewed coffee, passing them to their awaiting hands; the warm beverage was never missing from our household. The smile was back on my face the minute I saw their eyes widen after the first bite. "What do you think?"

Markus released a not so charming moan per my standards, while Stella sighed in content. Taking advantage of the situation, I slipped away from them; it was about time I got ready for a party.

I was exhausted, barely slept last night, and after today's surgery I knew I was reaching my limit. But I always cherished these small gatherings among colleagues. Getting wild was, most definitely, not part of tonight's plan. Luckily, Nelle's house wasn't far away from the hospital or our apartment, so the three of us could walk there.

And, oh, how much I loved summer night walks in Chicago. The sky was painted with all sorts of red and orange hues, creating a rather extravagant work of art. Along with the trees that littered this part of the city, the old bistros and cafes at each corner, everything, gave me a homey feeling; one I seemed to crave lately.

It wasn't long before we were in front of Nelle's apartment complex; the music filling the silent night was enough to get my blood pumping from both excitement and dread.

What was I thinking coming here? I should be in bed, watching a bad rom-com and eating my cannoli, dreading the calories the next day. But no.

The minute we walked through the door, Nelle came towards us in a very cute light grey jumpsuit, her light brown hair in curls framing her face. She was holding two big trays in her hands; one filled with tequila shots, salt and lemon slices, the other one with vodka filled tiny glasses. Forgetting my plan for tonight, I reached for two tequila shots, drinking them immediately. Nelle was very pleased with my actions, while my brother and Stella seemed weary of my actions.

"That's my girl. LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!" she shouted loud enough for almost everyone to hear.

I glanced around us in the spacious living room that was dimly lit. Linn was having a conversation with Gordon, a second-year intern. Even though we worked together, they both looked different without our usual work attire; more carefree.

I was pulled out of my thoughts when Stella pulled me in the middle of the living room, urging me to dance with her on tonight's makeshift dance floor. I didn't recognize all the faces around me, probably because this was an open invitation type of gathering, but it was refreshing to see new faces.

We were already dancing to one of my favorite songs, when Markus joined us with a beer bottle in his hand. His arm snaked around Stella's waist, pulling her close. She was a blushing mess, but after a while she gave him a brilliant smile and leaned closer to him, dancing to the rhythm.

I was in the kitchen looking for a drink of my own since I wanted to give Markus and Stella a moment together; coke and whisky would do for the night. I was taking a sip, when I felt a hand at the small of my back. The feeling was foreign, making me grit my teeth. Pushing the hand away, I turned around irritated.

It was the new guy, Jaxon.

"Hi, I'm Jaxon Inkles. Or Jax, whatever you prefer. I don't think I had the chance to introduce myself this morning." His voice was stone cold, like his icy blue eyes. He was towering above my small frame with his body as he moved his hand again, this time to grab a beer bottle from the counter behind me. It didn't go unnoticed how his hand brushed against my arm, the cold of the bottle a stark contrast on my warm skin.

"Erika Ricci." I simply said, taking a sidestep for my own comfort.

"So- uh..." His hand scratched at his neck in a way that seemed less intimidating, but cute with how unsure of himself he seemed in that moment. "You're an intern." It wasn't a question, so I just nodded. "Gosh, I'm sorry. You just make me nervous."

His words surprised me, as I was sure he could tell from my widened eyes and raised eyebrows. I never thought I was that scary myself, let alone intimidate someone like the man in front of me. Nevertheless, I didn't want to appear too friendly. He was still a stranger and my gut feeling kept urging me to flee the scene already; the reason, of course, remained unknown.

Maybe it was the cold blue of his eyes that resembled nothing of the warm green I became addicted to. These eyes made me feel alone, trapped, frozen in place, and I desperately needed a breath of warm green.

On second thought, maybe they reflected what he himself felt inside. Alone, trapped. Maybe he was searching of warm greens of his own.

"Why is that?" I asked, feeling conflicted.

"You seem like a clever woman, Erika Ricci, and that's intimidating on its own. On top of that, you're truly beautiful. How is that fair?" His eyes made a quick scan of my body, which would normally boost my confidence, but not tonight. Tonight, I just wanted to be invisible.

"Keen eyes you have there, Jaxon Inkles." I smirked on instinct, merely to hide the intimidation with confidence.

"So... are you from around here?"

"I'm actually from Italy. I came here on a scholarship with my best friend and brother." I pointed towards them with my finger and he nodded after finding them in the crowed.

Stella was already making eye contact with me, while I debated if I wanted to be in his company any longer. Moments later she made her way towards me, not leaving me much time to dwell on it; it was probably for the best.

"Sorry, just need to borrow my best friend for a minute!" She told him with a smile after they exchanged swift pleasantries.

It wasn't 'til I was in the company of both her and my brother that I felt relieved. My gut was telling me to walk away, but like a prey, I almost seemed enchanted under the eyes of a predator. He was giving me the chills all morning and even though I knew to stay away, there was something almost sad behind those orbs. In a way, he too seemed broken.

It was probably just a coincidence, but these two men appeared in my life in the spam of a week. And although their entrance was different, they somehow seemed interconnected, considering how both knew Dr. Marshall.

"Thank you for saving me yet again!" I whispered in her ear.

"You looked pretty nervous around him, so I had to rescue your cute little butt." We were both giggling, the alcohol kicking it up a few notches as well, as we made our way towards the living room.

"What's up with you and Markus?"

That was me under the influence. No filter whatsoever! Just ripped off the freaking band-aid.

"What are you talking about?" She tried to evade the question, but her blushing face was giving her away.

"Oh, come on Stellz. I know you. And him. You are both so flirty these past few days... The freaking cute names, all the hints and dirty smiles. I was literally with you two the whole time. Plus, I remember a certain someone having a crush on him back in high school. Soooo?" I told her, wiggling my eyebrows.

"You knew about my feelings for him?" Sometimes she was more naïve than me and I had no idea how that was possible.

"You are my best friend. Of course, I knew. And the whole 'saving myself for the one person' and stuff. I figured it out. I just wondered, why you didn't say anything. At least to me."

"How could I? After Matteo broke your heart, I was so worried about you. I couldn't unload my drama on you. I had to be there for you. Besides... Markus was always around some bimbo, so there was simply nothing to tell..." She looked on the floor for a moment thinking.

It was true that my brother experienced various relationships in the past, although, as his twin, I could feel the pull he had towards Stella. A pull he tried to ignore, simply because he didn't want to hurt her. In his own way, though, he always protected her. And, like the possessive animal he sometimes was, kept the rest of the guys away from what was, in his mind, his. I just wondered, when he would finally grow up.

"Well if it makes any difference, I approve of whatever this is..." I said, nudging her shoulder playfully.

"Do you really mean that?" Her eyes widened, making her look like a puppy.

"It's not like you are not my sister already!" I winked at her and she hugged me.

"Come on... Let's show everyone our dance moves!" She said in the cheesiest way, making me cringe a bit, but allowed her to pull me towards the circle that was formed in the middle of the living room.

I managed to relax when we danced together, only to tense again every time I caught Jaxon's eyes watching me. He was blending with the crowed, making light conversation, while at other times he was staring at me while sipping from his beer bottle. It would have been unsettling, but the alcohol in my system made me shrug it off.

Once again Markus was right behind us, keeping the opposite sex away from his beloved girls. He would pinch Stella's waist, teasing her and she would blush before pushing him away. Of course, he couldn't stay away; how could he, really.

"My favorite Ricci siblings together on another unforgettable night!" Stella hugged both of us, before we continued dancing.

These two managed to keep a set of warm green eyes off my mind... at least for a little while.

___