Adam's POV

I never thought I would say it, think it, or believe it, but: I missed John.

The two of us had really begun to hit it off. I mean, first and foremost, our sex was incredible. When John wasn't being a spastic, pain-hungry little freak, he actually had some skills in the room.

It was low-maintenance, too. I liked that. Neither of us desired to go out on fancy dates, meet each other's parents, fall in love, or whatever. We were just taking it easy. We were two older men with a sex-drive and a desire for the company of someone else.

Or at least, that's what I was trying to make myself believe. I was starting to have these horrific thoughts...

What was John's family like? Besides Aidan, what does his romantic history look like? What sports teams does he root for? What are his favorite shows or his favorite songs?

Ugh. It was disgusting.

And now, to make matters worse, I was actually thinking about him throughout my workday. To be fair, it all began with thoughts of the sex that we'd had last night. That wasn't romantic. However, my thoughts evolved into more. I wanted to know what he was doing. I didn't even know what his job was, or if he even had a job. ...Knowing him, it was very possible that he didn't have a job.

"Shut up, Adam," I muttered to myself. "You don't have feelings for John. If anything, you're not even over your ex-husband from a decade ago. No, definitely not. ...If any other man bares his hole to me, I'd feel perfectly fine pounding into it."

The twisting feeling in my gut said otherwise, but I ignored that.

I went through each paper I was grading and pulled out Jerry's. I smacked a fucking A onto it without reading it. I didn't care. If it meant keeping my job and reading less papers, I didn't have a single complaint.

Then I took out Finn's. I had a mental battle with myself. Was it immature that I continued to do this? Shouldn't I feel a certain kinship to the kid that had to deal with my ex-boyfriend's flaws the way I had to?

Nope. No kinship.

I licked my hand and smacked it into the center of his paper. On time I'd taken a shit and held the paper over the toilet as I'd flushed. That was hilarious. One of these days I was planning on drinking gallons of water to dilute my pee, and then rubbing some pee onto it.

Maybe I'd save that for his final essay. I could really go out with a bang for that one.

A texted made my phone flash. I opened it in a disgustingly fast way, because apparently I was an attention-whore for John now.

John: thinking of you hot daddy

Attached was a picture of his erect penis.

Which should have disgusted me. Instead, I palmed myself a little through my jeans and sent him a picture of my bulge.

Nope, there weren't any feelings here. Pure carnal desire. I'd leave him for any other person in a second.

A quick knock on my office door allowed me to block the bulge in my pants with a stack of papers. Jerry burst into my office a second later.

"I need to talk with you," he said before I could even say hello. He slammed the office door shut, locked it, and the shuttered. "Ew. Gross flashbacks."

Yup, same. My skin was crawling just from having him here.

"What do you need to talk about?" I asked instead, hoping this would be made quick. "I'm trying to grade papers. And, as you can see—" I waved his in his face"—you got the grade you wanted."

Jerry grinned. "Oh, good. That's great to see, I'm glad you're undoing your treachery. No. Listen. I'm having a crisis."

He actually did look like he was having a crisis. His hair looked frizzy, his clothes had creases, and his eyes had dark bags under them.

"Can't it wait for tomorrow?" I reasonably asked. "After class? I'm seriously grading papers."

"No, that's Friday!" Jerry screeched, as if that we supposed to mean something to me. "I don't have that much time. I have to know before then. Okay. Okay, this is it. You've got this Jerry. Oh God, maybe I should've done this with Aidan—"

As per usual, Aidan's name sent a shock through me. I jerked up and stared at him. "What about Aidan?"

"Down, psycho," Jerry said, rolling his eyes and waving me off. "Nothing about Aidan. I'm just having a personal crisis. A... um, a midlife crisis where I think I'm sexually attracted to older men and it's messing with my brain."

I squinted at him. "What?"

He tugged his hair and growled. "Ugh! You're so stupid. This doesn't even make any sense."

"Are you... do you need directions to the nearest mental asylum, or...?"

Jerry stomped his foot. "Okay, here's the deal, Adam," he snapped. "Before Robert, I hooked up with you. Because I had some weird sexual thing for you, okay? I think I hated you and that made me kind of curious about you. Anyway, no need to dissect that situation."

I shuttered just thinking about it. "I was trying to get back at Aidan by fucking another one of his students. But he wasn't jealous when he found out, was he?"

Jerry's jaw dropped. He stared. "No, he wasn't jealous, you absolute psychopath."

"...Bummer."

Jerry looked at me with disgust. "Wow. You're dad ejaculated into your mom and you were the sperm that won? Appalling."

My jaw dropped, but I didn't even have to words to respond to that comment.

"Anyway! I'm trying to explain to you that I have feelings for someone," he said, looking awfully torn up about it. "But now I'm confused. I don't know if I like him for who he is, or because he's opening a door to a whole new sexual experience, or because he's a sexy older man."

I tugged at my hair. "Please get out of my office. The last thing I need right now is that giant of a man smashing me into a wall because he's jealous."

Jerry blushed. "He won't. He wants me to do soul-searching. Any anyway, he said we're just hooking up, so I'm allowed to be with other people. This is the only way."

I squinted at him. "I'm confused. Are you asking me to have sex with you? Because sure, but it can't be right now. It has to be tomorrow. I'm grading papers."

Jerry gagged. "Ew. No. No, I just... okay, don't make fun of me. Or look at me funny. But... okay, I liked making out with you, okay? It was hot. I liked... I guess I liked hooking up with you."

Huh. Weird day for a random ego stroke, but I'd take it.

Maybe the world was finally going easy on me.

"Okay, thanks," I said.

I failed to see his point, but he was probably going to get around to it some time this hour.

Jerry wiped his hands down his face. "God, it's probably not good that I'm dreading this. That probably is saying something. But... eep. Okay. Can we make out real quick?"

This world was a weird, weird place.

I stared at the little college student, wondering if this was a ploy to get me fired. Although... if it was a ploy to get me fired, I was probably done the moment I told him that I'd have sex with him tomorrow.

Might as well get fired in style.

"Okay," I decided, ignoring the gross feeling in my gut. Those were probably my morals, but it had been way too long for me to really know for sure. "Come sit in my lap, I already have a hard-on."

Jerry stopped to gag a little bit before gingerly sitting in my lap, trying to avoid my boner as best as humanly possible. His face was red and he couldn't meet my eyes. "Okay, so just like, not too much tongue, okay?"

I cupped his face in mine and brought him down so that my lips met his. He tasted sweet, a mixture of pastries and coffee. I led the kiss gently, using hardly any tongue. I gave the brat a show. Part of me wanted him to be confused.

I ran my fingers through his hair, tugging gently. I parted his lips and let our tongues brush together. It was a good kiss.

And then he pulled away, eyes wide. "Holy shit," he gasped, staring at me. "This is terrible."

I was having the same sinking feeling that he was. "Fuck, kid. That was... this is not good."

"Oh my God," Jerry said, covering his mouth. "That was a good kiss."

I nodded. "It really was."

"It was literally physically phenomenal."

"That might be an exaggeration."

"And... shit, I didn't even like it," he burst out. "I didn't even think I liked it for a second. Shit. I feel all nauseous and guilty now. Fuck... but I'm not dating Robert and he told me that we weren't exclusive. But I still feel... oh no. This is bad, Adam. This can only mean one thing."

"Me too," I muttered, realizing what that sinking feeling was.

It wasn't my morals; those had died a long time ago. It was about John.

"Shit," Jerry muttered, getting up off my lap.

"Oh my God," I realized. "I just had a hot college kid make out with me. And I didn't even like it that much. Fuck... I think I like John. Romantically."

Jerry's head tilted, confusion cutting through his horrified expression. "Who the hell is that?"

"Doesn't matter," I said. "Get out of here, kid. I need to make a phone call."

And the second Jerry left, I dialed John's number.

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