Jerry's POV

I was having some serious emotional issues.

And I wasn't talking about the sub drop drama of yesterday, where I'd wanted to flay the skin from Robert's bones and chew on his insides. ...That was graphic. But, no. I was having emotional issues on the opposite side of the spectrum.

In chemistry, I hardly paid attention at all. I was too busy trying not to think and be nervous. Considering I was usually scribbling notes, answering questions, and chatting with everyone around me, I'd gotten some weird looks from Aidan already.

...Class was also way more boring now that Aidan was mostly sober the whole time. He put up with less shit.

"Psst," I hissed to Finn. "I'm having issues."

Finn was staring, head in hand and mouth wide open, at Aidan. He didn't even hear me the first time. His eyes were totally glassy.

I followed his gaze to our professor who, admittedly, was a fucking sexy beast. Shit. I'd pay big money to watch that man punish Finn.

"Psst," I tried again. "How fast do you think I can obtain a white stallion?"

Finn's eyelashes fluttered and he reluctantly shifted his gaze away from Aidan. "Huh?"

"How fast do you think I can obtain a white stallion?" I asked again, wondering why in the hell that wasn't clear enough already.

Viv, Brianna, and Ben all stared at me with irritation in their eyes.

"Shut up," Brianna whispered. "Just because you're a freaking genius doesn't mean that we can all chat and get As. Quiet."

Brittany, our favorite female in Chemistry class, reached behind herself to slap my knee and hiss. "His shirt is riding up. I repeat; his shirt is riding up."

Sure enough, Aidan had stretched and his shirt was riding up just a little. I knew he was doing it for Finn, just like the dirty little Powerpuff Girl he was.

"Damn!" I said, to put on a show, but my heart wasn't in it.

To be fair, leering at my sexy professor had died on me a bit since he started dating my best friend. Plus, my hot older guy was way more attractive. Aidan was starting to look less like a sexy older guy and more like a muscular gorilla.

...Shit. Thinking that Aidan wasn't the sexiest man on the planet was a sign that I really did have emotional problems.

Because Finn and I had grown as people since the beginning of the semester, we didn't chatter during our lecture. Instead, we sat and learned. And let our peers learn. Like the good Samaritans we were.

But the second the class was over? I basically had Finn pinned against the wall.

"I have to confess something to you really quickly because it's embarrassing, so you have to be supportive and help me, okay?" I word-vomited.

Finn gave me his best googly-eye impersonation. "Huh? Okay then."

"Grand." I clapped, because I was very nervous and tended to do weird things when that was the case. "Dope. What's good in the hood? Okay, sorry, I'm just prepping. This is gonna just like happen real quick, okay? Leave, you guys."

I shooed the rest of my friend group, the gossiping queens, away. They flipped me off and went on about their business.

"Okay." I took a deep breath. "IthinkIloveRobert."

Finn's jaw hit the ground. "What! No way! I mean, to be fair, it's about time, guy! Robert has been flirting with you since forever! OH MY GOD. MCHARDIN FOR THE MOTHERFUCKING WIN."

Aidan poked his nose out of the classroom now that all the students had filed away. "Why are you yelling the boat name?"

"Ship name, dumb dumb!" Finn said, flailing his arm in Aidan's direction. "C'mere. C'mere! Come gaze at him in happiness with me."

Aidan rolled up and held Finn's hand, sending me a quizzical look. "Okay, Finny, why are we gazing?"

Finn rested his head on Aidan's shoulder— a bold move from someone whose relationship was supposed to be a secret. "Daddy. We're looking at a man who's in love."

"Did you just call me daddy?!"

"Shh," Finn said, holding a finger to Aidan's lips. "You're missing the point here. Jerry is in love."

"I, quite frankly, could give two shits about Jerry's love life until you swear on your life and your hair accessories that you will never call me daddy again until the day that I die."

Finn blinked. "Not until the day that I die?"

"I don't give a shit what you call me after I'm dead," Aidan scoffed. "Write daddy on my fucking tombstone for all I care."

Finn and I made deviant eye contact.

"I won't be forgetting he said that," I said.

"Anyway!" Finn huffed, tugging at Aidan's sleeve. "Jerry just told me that he's in love with Master Robert. Which means he needs to go confess his love right the fuck now."

But that was the issue. I didn't know how to do it.

I stared at the ground thoughtfully. "I've never confessed love before. I was thinking that I should ride in on a white horse. Like, as he's leaving work."

Aidan stared at me. "You're planning on riding a horse to the parking lot of Home Depot?"

"Not that job!"

"...You're planning on riding a horse to a BDSM club in East Prov?"

I wasn't appreciating the hate that I was getting.

I ran my fingers through my hair and growled. "Look, here's my issue. I'm not even sure if what I'm feeling is love, okay? But if it is, I need to embrace that. And I think it is. And to embrace that, I want to express my feelings for Robert by doing a sweet gesture, like...a horse and buggy ride, I don't know, stop looking at me like that?!"

I knew my plan was bad when even Finn was giving me a tad bit of a judgmental stare.

"I don't think you need a grand gesture," Finn reasoned. "Sometimes, the best parts of love are the quiet parts; the parts where you're just with someone, and you're so comfortable."

Aidan snapped his fingers and pointed at Finn. "True. But also, consider: you might totally not be in love at all."

That was my emotional troubles! It was like Aidan could read my mind.

"I don't know," I wailed. "I've never been in love! How do I know that I'm in love? What even is love? Is this something that romance novelists made up to make people think they have a chance at happiness? Oh Gaga."

"Here come the dramatics..." Aidan muttered, looking longingly down the hallway like he was plotting his escape.

Finn bounced on his feet, eyes dancing with excitement. "I can help! Let's go to Aidan's office and then we can figure things out."

Aidan wrinkled his nose. "Don't you two have a writing class that you need to be getting to?"

"Ew," I scoffed. "I don't think I'll ever be able to look Big Bird again in the eyes as long as I live. Onward to the office, let's go."

Five minutes of walking later, and we were settled in Aidan's office. I took the spinny chair, Finn took the dog bed, and Aidan took the shitty chair in the corner that was meant for students.

"Do you ever stop staring at him?" Finn read off of his phone.

"I mean, obviously!" I sputtered. "But like, I do stare sometimes."

"Do you always think about him?"

"...Jeez. Yeah, I kinda do."

"Do you want him to be happy?"

"Of course."

"Have you been stressed lately?"

"Bitch, you have no idea!"

"Are you trying new things?"

"...Like you wouldn't even believe."

Finn gestured at me like he was underhand throwing multiple balls. "According to Google, you Sir are in love! Boom. It's granted to you. Have it. Love."

I met Aidan's eyes. "Is he hyper right now or is it just me?"

Aidan shook his head, grimacing slightly. "Oh, absolutely. We had an...urm, late night last night, and he drank coffee this morning. This is what we get."

Aidan gestured at Finn, who was now flopping backwards into the dog bed and kicking his legs into the air. "Don't judge me!" he squealed. "My ship is finally sailing!"

"I don't know why he keeps talking about boats," Aidan sighed.

I ignored them both in favor of typing 'grand gestures of love' into my phone. Just as I hit the search button, a text from Robert popped up and scared me shitless.

My Dom🖤⛓: finally got some time to text you. I miss you sweet boy ☺️

And thanks to that text, my heart decided to suddenly breakdance. "Holy shit, I'm in love," it dawned on me. "Nobody gets that freaking excited about someone saying sappy shit."

I answered in record speed.

Me: i miss you too 🥺

My Dom🖤⛓: how are you feeling after yesterday?

"Jerry," Finn snapped, waving his hand under my nose. "Earth to Jerry? Hi. Aidan asked what happened."

"He said he missed me," I sighed.

They both made eye contact and rolled their eyes.

I chose to ignore that.

Me: i feel good i promise. But i do have an idea for tonight...be dressed in something cute when i get home

"Okay!" I said, sitting up and shoving my phone in their faces. "Google says a grand romantic gesture is something expensive. Well it doesn't say that, but it basically implies it because the first three things on the list are a weekend getaway, a helicopter tour, and a cruise."

Finn hopped out of the dog bed just to stare Aidan dead in the eyes.

Aidan gestured at the bed. "Sit. Ask me for a cruise one more time and I'll spank you."

"Don't tempt me!"

My Dom🖤⛓: something cute? Wtf does that mean

Me: just look nice! Tonight is gonna be special

"Gotta go, boys," I said, hoisting up my backpack and waving goodbye. "I'm treating my mans to some din din."

I got dressed in my cutest business casual outfit and zipped over to Stop & Shop to get a personalized cake with the words, 'I love you' on it. Because I was a broke child, and that was the kind of thing that I considered to be a grand gesture.

But if I had the money for horses, I would've bought them.

I also got a shitty little bouquet of roses, because that was totally adorable. If I was going to declare my love, it had to be with a bouquet of roses.

Finally, I was ready for my date.

I rolled up to Robert's house and knocked on the door, roses in hand. He answered the door and my entire brain short-circuited.

Oh.

My.

Landa.

The man was delectable in a dark button-up shirt that emphasized every freaking muscle of his upper body. He'd trimmed his beard to sexy stubble and leaned against the door with his hands in the pocket of his dark pants.

"Roses?" he said, jaw dropping a little. He didn't look upset, though. "What's the special occasion?"

I handed him the roses, heart beating nervously in my chest. "Red Robin?" I squeaked. "I mean! Okay, I kind of wanted to treat you to a really nice date, like a helicopter tour or a cruise. But then I realized that I'm not rich, so I decided to get you a nice dinner. But then I realized that I'm not even financially stable, so we're going to Red Robin. But I got roses?"

And the way he looked at me then confirmed it all; I was in love. Because my heart did flips just from looking into those gorgeous blue eyes, or being greeted with his smile. "I love Red Robin," he said, leaning down to kiss me like I was his husband coming home from the war. "Let's get these roses in a vase and then we'll go."

I had the awkward realization that I would have to physically bring the cake inside and hope he didn't realize it was there until desert. Which made walking into the building a bit awkward, because Robert stared at me like I had three heads when I reached into the backseat.

"You can't mention this!" I instructed him.

Thankfully the cake was covered by the bag.

Robert still stared. "What on earth are you bringing into this building? Is that a cake? ...Do you think it's my birthday today?"

"No!" I squawked. "I don't, actually! It's not your birthday...right?"

He shook his head.

My cheeks were on fire. "Just don't mention the bag, okay?"

We got into the building and managed to order before he crossed his arms. "Okay, I'm dying here," he finally cracked. "Please tell me about the cake. It's clearly a cake, don't pretend like it's not a cake. Whose birthday is it? ...Holy shit, is it your birthday?"

"No!" I said quickly, because his whole face had drained of color. "Shit, okay, fine, I'll do this now, but I was hoping to wait until the end so we could either eat cake or go home awkwardly, depending on how this goes."

He stared at me.

Cheeks on fire, I tugged the bag off of the cake. "Um...this is my grand gesture! Because I wanted to tell you that I love you."

I closed my eyes and pretended I didn't exist.

"Jerry? Oh my God," he gasped and I opened my eyes. His were wide with shock. "You really do?"

I nodded quickly.

He broke into a smile that sent my heart into a the sickest breakdance ever. "You didn't need to do a grand gesture, sweet boy. I love you too, of course."

Relief hit me so quickly that I almost passed out. "Oh thank God!" I gasped, hopping over to his side and kissing him like my life depended on it. "I was pretty sure, but not that sure!"

Robert wrapped his arms around me and kissed me again and again. "Of course I do, sweetheart. You mean the world to me."

An awkward throat clear broke us apart. A young lady in an apron was blushing. "Um...I can come back when you're ready?"

We both sat back down at the table and let the lady take our orders, but I couldn't stop my smile.

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