The Night Out (Part-2)

ANUJ'S POV (PART-1)

My heartbeat sped up as the restaurant came into view. Unconsciously I pressed the accelerator just a little more. My Audi immediately picked up its pace and so did my breathing. I could now clearly hear my rapid breaths filling the quiet space of my car. The hands holding the steering wheel felt jittery and so did my legs, making me question if my age is catching up on me or the nerves of finally getting to see her after 26 years...

'I need to stay calm, I need to stay calm.." I repeated it for the hundredth time today but my body seemed to have a mind of its own. It was scary yet exhilarating how much this woman has her control over me even after these 26 years.

"And now in a few minutes I'm going to see her again..." I whispered dreamily. My mind got alerted once again as the reality of the situation drawned on me. This is it...!This is it..!

Keeping her alone in my thoughts was now the new reality of mine, it became such a wistful dream since the last 26 years that now all the college memories of her felt like a dream. A beautiful- wait, too beautiful dream that can never be a reality. She was one of those untouchable angels that you can only dream about, you can never have them.

I had made a pact with myself that I'd exist with her thoughts and die alone with her in them since she's untouchable and unreachable. For the past 26 years, she only existed in my memories, that now the lines between reality and dream blurred for me. It felt surreal, that I'll get to see her today, how my eyes will finally confirm that she's a living breathing human like the rest of us.

How would she look now? What would she sound like? I tried not to imagine it as then I'd drown myself in another new set of thoughts. And tonight isn't about drowning in thoughts or sorrows or shayaris. Tonight is about completing a mission.

A mission involving staring, staring and staring. Staring her to my heart's content to spend the next 26 years alone, staring to confirm that angels do exist, staring her to capture her new memories for my shayaris.

I was jittery enough by the thought of seeing her, existing in the same place as her and breathing in the same space as hers after 26 years...that meeting or talking to her was an entirely different spectrum, a forbidden wish that I never dared to hope for.

Why? Because I know how hard reality strikes and crushes your hopes and you. A bittersweet memory of her wedding day crept into my mind, how much beautiful and happy she was looking at that day and how the reality dawned that I've lost her forever. From that day I realized, hope was a dangerous territory, a forbidden place where my mind would never lurk around, ever.

Samajhdaar aadmi ya toh ummed karta hai, ya pyaar.

That's why I'm happy with my role of admiring her from afar. I've never met her or talked to her, ever. Always been her silent admirer or invisible helper, and that's what I intend to be, be it registering her for a dance competition or buying her factory. She might be unaware of my existence but that doesn't matter, as long as she's happy, I'm happy and I'm content to be her well-wisher from the shadows. That's my desting and I've made peace with that.

Finally having a clearity of thoughts, I heaved a long breath and pulled up near the hotel entrance. Before I could stop the car for the valet, distant sound of talking and laughing drifted towards me. I sighed as I recognised the voice. Ofcourse it's Devika. Nobody could be as loud as her.

Wait...if Devika's here that means....?

Immediately my gaze snapped towards the restaurant's entrance and I caught the familiar silhouette of Devika entering into the restaurant. But what sped up my heartbeat wasn't her, it was the blur of a dark blue saree in front of Devika that made me halt the breaks in a rush.

'Calm down, calm down, you're not sure it was her...'My brain reasoned, because Devika has blocked the rest for me to see and confirm. 'Thanks a lot you idiot... '

But deep down my heart knew who the person was in the dark blue saree...