Donnie just stared at the ground paralyzed, not knowing what to do or say. Fear ran through his body, seeming to never go away...

For some reason, his whole body was shaking vigorously non-stop. His leg bouncing up and down, he could stay still his hands, arms, legs, everything was shaking uncontrollably.

He was way to over stimulated.

'how could I be so stupid?...' he thought to himself, ' and non the less by my older fucking brother too!... I am worthless...' a corner of his mouth drooped down as a half frown, he choked back tears

' I don't deserve anything good." Walked back to his room with sorrow, no one else was awake anymore, at least he thought because it was deathly silent in the lair, not even a faint whisper could be heard

He paused for a second in the middle of walking, he heard a faint conversation silently echoing through the hallway

He traced the sound twords to his littlest brother, Mikey's room. He leaned in closely, trying to figure out what he was talking about

He hesitated, pulling away from the curtains ' I'm being too nosey ' he came to realize

He shook his head and walked away, but again stopped in his tracks, he heard his name being mentioned, he drew his attention and curiosity back to the curtains

"Yeah I don't know what's going on with him! I miss my old older brother!..." Mikey sighed out

Donnie looked down in shame, ' and now I'm disappointing my only little brother too?...' he thought to himself

"I know how you feel Michelangelo, yin and I have always found ourselves thinking we had lost our closest friends, but maybe in a while your brother Donatello will return normal" yang said reassuringly

"Or he may never come back..." Yang murmured quietly, Donnie didn't catch what he said but... He had a feeling he knew what they ment

"W-what?, You mean I might never get my bro back?!" Mikey was shocked and saddened

"N-no!, That's not what yang ment!"

"Yes it might be"

Yin and yang spoke at the same time interrupting each other

Donnie heard the room fell silent, but flooding with whispers of yin and yang, he heard sniffles behind the curtains, it was his brothers instinct.... It was Mikey's saddened tears falling to the ground in disappointment..

Donnie whispered to himself, "I cause pain for everyone... Even my little brother..." He didn't mean to say it out loud, his hand slapped against his mouth covering it in shock

"Did you hear that? Yang, Mikey?"

"Hmm" Mikey's hummed in agreement

"Yeah..." Yin murmured

Donnie knew he was discovered, he fled back to his lab in shame... "Dammit..." He muttered under his breath

"What... Is.. WRONG WITH ME?!" his anger got the best of him, he stomped his foot onto the ground, blood boiling

"WHY?!.... WHY.... Why can't I do anything right?..." He sobbed out softly

He locked his door, and took off his shell protector, his goggles, and all his gear all except his bandana gloves and feet wrappings.

He stared at himself contently.... Tears dripping down his face subtly

"I'm just a weak softshell!...." He whined

He threw his back against the wall, he forgot about his shell and hissed in slight pain, he just took and it slid down... His shell leaning on the door whilst he looked up at the ceiling in sorrow

' what would it be like if I weren't here.' the thought just made his body shiver.

' no.... No! Don't think like that Donatello!' he agreed with the thoughts in his head, he hated being like this... He hated feeling bad, he hated feeling so worthless and weak...

His shoulders slumped downwards and he tilted his head twords his knees, he curled up into the fetal position and just laid there in silence....

Who knows what thoughts this turtle had going through his mind right now....

He let out a huge sigh, he closed his eyes only for seconds, but in those few seconds he fell asleep....

He groaned, waking in a dark room, unable to move..

"W-what...." He muttered

His eyes darted around the endless empty black void surrounding him, nothing in sight and no one

"H...hello?, What going on?..." He questioned, it echoed throughout in that room

Then a familiar laugh emersed from the shadows....

Donnie flinched, his stomach dropped... He knew where that laugh came from...

"W....wait.... No..." He breathlessly murmured

The laugh became louder... And louder.... As if it was coming closer twords him, almost at a walking motion... Then a shape appeared from the shadows.

"Wha... No! NO! NO NO! MEATSWEATS?!?" The purple turtle yelped out

"L...LET ME GO!, MY BROTHERS W-WILL COME AFTER YOU!" he shouted, trying to move his body, and part, and part at all

Meatsweats came closer to Donnie, he licked his chomps... With a devilish smile like the last time....

"Donatello ...." His voice echoed

"NO NO NO NOOO!, KEEP AWAY FROM ME!" Donnie's eyes, ripe with hot tears running like a river down his pale green face, his breath shaking with fear

Donnie suddenly was being lifted front he ground... On that same table....

"PLEASE NO!" he cried out

The pig just laughed that evil laugh once again and placed his hand on Donnie's shoulder, leaning in... Meatsweats other hand came in contact with his plastron... Moving in an up and down motion...

"NO PLEASE DONT- STOP!!, NOOO" he screamed, his throat hurt

...

Donnie bolted up, his eyes pouring like a waterfall

It was... Just a nightmare....

He sighed in relief that it wasn't real... But his voice still hurt, he might have been yelling in his sleep...

He rubbed his eyes, his moist tears now wet spots on his glove, he got up and sat in his lab chair, his hands on his forehead, he had a major migraine

"Those memories... They keep playing in my head over and over.... How do I get them to stop?..."

"Do I need to tell my brothers?...."

Donnie's hated telling the others how he felt, even if it was for the greater good

Donnie stomach growled with hunger, he just realized he hadn't eaten in probably days... That didn't surprise him, it was the fact that he didn't want to, at all!

Every blink, every single second he closed his eyes, those horrid scene flashes before him, every single moment... The pain it caused him... How he could never fight, talk, or even move got to him, he felt even more worthless than he did before

His thoughts were interrupted with subtle knocks on the door,

"Donatello?"

"It's us, yin and yang"

Donnie was surprised, he had forgotten that the turtles were still here. "Uhm... Yeah, what is it?" He responded

"We were just wondering if you'd like to hang out with us for a bit?" Yang stated numbly, sounding like they were reading from a script

"Yeah we haven't had a conversation with you yet! We wanna talk to youuuu!" Yin playfully commented

Donnie hesitated at the thought of having strangers in his room, even if they were plausibley his distant siblings, but he gave in, he wanted to question then anyways

"S-sure" Donnie's voice was scratchy, he quickly rubbed dhis eyes once more and rushed to the door

He unlocked it and stood aside letting the turtles in

"Woah!!! This place is huuuge!" Yin spoke excitedly

"It's nothing really... Just my lab" Donnie forced a small chuckle

"Are you kidding it's awesome!!!" Yin was stimming excitedly looking around

"Yin calm down, your stimming again" yang spoke while patting yins hand gently

Yin completely ignored yang and blurted out "How is your lab so awesome! It's so... Sciencey!!!"

Donnie gave a small smile, someone had interest in the thing he liked most

"I- I have a question for the both of you, how does your body function? Like how do you control it?" Donnie couldn't help it but he loved asking questions

"Oh that's easy!, Yang controls one side and I control the other! If one of us is sleeping then the other can control both, but if ones unconscious one stays limp, neither of us know why" they both took turns explaining the sentence

"That's cool!, But what if for example, yang got pinched, would you feel it yin?"

"Mmm it depends on the pain level, like if it's medium or higher, then the other of us can feel it slightly"

"Yeah, out anatomy is odd that way" yin chimed in

"Hmm..., Is it alright if I could run some tests on you two?" Donnie questioned rushing through the sentence, hurried for an answer

Yin and yang both look at each other, and nodded in agreement, yin had a big grin on and yang had this numb and emotionless expression

"Great! Let's get started, have a seat I'll grab my equipment!" Donnie hummed, he forgot all about this troubles, he loved doing science things

But how long can they be forgotten and out of the way?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey guys! I'm going to be putting this story on hold for a little while, reasons below👇

• Ive been busy lately

• school has been stressful

• I'm going to be working on another fanfiction, between Leo and his ooo spokey animal instincts which is terrifying true in nature

• and four, I'm applying to so many acting classes and talent agencies at the moment too

Thanks for reading this story so far!,