"You and I don't really belong together, Mish."

"You are not worth it Mishkhat."

"We should stop talking, Mishkhat."

Once he said all these to her, and he meant it all.

Once he broke her heart, and he looked back.

"We really don't belong together."

"Perhaps, we are not worth it."

"We really should stop this, for once and for all."

Once she said these to him, and she meant it.

Once she walked away from him, and never looked back.

And that was the end of a saga, a chaotic love tale. The end of their love story.

For after that, Hamza Sayyed never felt regret like that ever again.

The regret of loving someone so good yet losing them for he was a pathetic lover, a coward human, and a great son.

For after that, Mishkhat Khawar never felt remorse like that ever again.

The remorse of loving someone all your life yet losing them, letting them go for she had enough of it.

And that was half a decade ago.

Five-long summers ago.

Six-cold winters ago.

And now, when he sat in the cafe near her place, he couldn't help but let his mind wander off there. Two moons have passed since the last time he saw her.

The last time she was at the hospital to see his mother and even paid the bill. Something that had hurt his fragile ego, a lot. After that, she just left, as she had told him. She moved back to her city, joined her office and moved away with life.

Mishkhat Khawar wasn't going to waste her time on him, and she didn't.

The last two months were busy for him. His mother's health, his sister's separation and her coming back to his place permanently. And with that his job. Life is moving for him as well.

Hamza Sayyed didn't stop for her either, he couldn't.

A week ago he called her and asked her to meet. She said she will be coming next week for her mother's appointment. And hence, they are here. Finally.

Today, he is going to lose her, yet again.

And this time he doesn't know whom to blame it on.

Himself?

Her?

Or maybe just fate.

Maybe he will settle up for the last one. But even though Mishkhat Khawar wasn't here for two long months, she had left her essence in his life.

Her coconut vanilla shampoo on his bathroom.

Her shea butter moisture in his cabinet.

Her body mist of citrus and peonies

She wasn't here, her essence was. And he loved that.

A long sigh left his lips and a sad smile lingers there. One last try today.

The door open with jingles and there she is.

Mishkhat Khawar in the beautiful blue silk saree, the white sleeveless blouse and the deep neck.

The jhumkey touched her collar bones, kissing the mole just there.

Her black waves flowed freely and the copper highlights had faded into a shade of brown.

Her hazel eyes filled with a single dark line of kohl and the diamond shining on her left nose.

Mishkhat Khawar is indeed the epitome of beauty.

She had always been that she will always be.

And as she walks towards him, her heels clicking the tiled floor with her heels. He couldn't help but smile. His eyes fall behind her, Binafsha trailing behind. She wouldn't have spent even an hour with him alone.

The irony.

"You are early." She said looking at him, he nodded.

"I have to."

"So you want to discuss something?" She said once looking at him then at Binafsha.

"Shall we order something first?" He said motioning the waiter to come over.

"One frappe for me and one expresso for her." Mishkhat places their order eyeing his plate of sandwiches.

He really had been here for a long.

"So?" Mishkhat looks at him yet again and this time he finally brings the file to the table.

The file contains their divorce papers. Unsigned one.

"I ended up things with your cousin." He said looking at her, she nodded.

"I would have done the same." She mumbles, nearly not wanting him to hear that but he did. He raised a brow at her and she smiles as she continues.

"I would never have settled up with someone who will ever have any seconds thought about me, or rather us. I would have chosen to walk out of there only to never look back again." He gulps hearing her words.

"I would never have settled up with someone not worth it all." The message wasn't hidden for him anymore.

She made it clear.

Crystal clear.

She is leaving him because he was not sure about them once.

And he is not worth it all, they ain't.

He smiles at her words, at her.

The pang of guilt was evident in his onyx pair of eyes and for once he saw something on her hazels ones too.

Something that almost felt like a regret.

Something that almost felt like a fondness, a loss, grief.

Something that was so clear once there but now, all gone.

Something that almost seems like love.

"You still want this?" He whispered, hoping for her to deny but she didn't.

"You settling up with my cousin or not, never really matter to me Hamza. I was upset when I got to know about the alliance, yes because I never wanted you back in my life in any way that's it. I was never going to marry you Hamza, not after all that." He nodded at this.

And that was enough for him. He slowly opened the file and signed their fate. Ended it.

He closes his eyes and sighs.

Finally letting her go.

Finally losing the chance of having her in his life back.

The last time it didn't pain as much.

But this time the pain is profound in him, the regret is.

Hamza Sayyed will always have the regret losing Mishkhat Khawar.

She is looking at him, a soft smile playing on her lips.

He looks pained, tired and guilty. Everything he wasn't back then he is now

She might have given him a chance back then.

But now she just can't.

He is late, way too late.

He pushed the file towards her, she signed it and passed it to Binafsha. She had been looking at the two all-time. The expresso is almost half-finished.

"I will submit these and you two will get the copies soon." They nodded and she silently left, leaving them alone for some time.

"Mish" Hamza whispers and this time Mishkhat didn't snap, she smiled.

"Yes?"

"Was you ever happy with me?" He asked, he just have to.

"I was happy with you Hamza. We were not the best of lovers but we were happy. You were my definition of happiness, once." She said and he nodded.

He isn't looking at her now.

"I was always happy with you Mish. When I was with you, I never had to think about anything, you bear it all. My anger, frustration, myself, my routines. You were just perfect, I wasn't."

"I wasn't perfect Hamza. I am just another flawed human."

And she is right. Hamza slowly looks at her, his eyes a little blurred.

In life, people are mostly grey, neither white nor black.

Humans are flawed, neither always right nor always wrong. Even after that, some people just owned up their faults. Some just do the wrong thing right.

Mishkhat Khawar is that person.

He knows she is not right here. She just snatched their chance of being together by not even trying.

She is wrong.

But then again she is right too.

She is right very well.

She wasn't his first choice.

She wasn't his bride that day.

And with time he knows, there would have been issues between there her and his mother, and he wouldn't have chosen either of them.

Mishkhat Khawar would never be settled up with that, not now at least.

He cleared his throat and finally asked, "Now that the divorce is almost done. May I have the honour of knowing The Ibrahim Ali?"

She shakes her head, "He is a friend, a close one."

"You love him?" He couldn't help but ask.

And this she didn't smile, she just looks at him and softly said, "He is getting married next month Hamza. I was away for his wedding shopping. When I told him about this, he even asked me to give us a chance, if I want to. And that's the reason, I care him so much, he always wants me to do what I want."

Ibrahim Ali always cared about Mishkhat's wishes.

Hamza Sayyed never had.

"You didn't answer my question Mishkhat."

"I couldn't fall in love again Hamza, I was broken when Ibrahim came into my life. He had his own baggage. But he helped me a lot, and in the process of healing each other, we found our home. We are good friends, maybe family but not lovers, never that."

"You?"

"I never loved anyone else other than you Hamza, I couldn't. And that's not because you are a great lover, you're terrible in thar. It's just something to do with my incapability to fall in love again, to trust again."

"So you never want to settle up with anyone?"

"It doesn't matter what I want in this case." He furrows but she continued.

"All that matters what I want." She said with a smile then slowly stood up.

He smiles back at her. He got the message clear, again.

All while he was thinking about his wants or her wants, his decision or hers. And about theirs.

But that's not how a relationship works.

Relationships, as fragile as theirs need an extra bit of care. And even though he wanted he never gave it to her.

There was no them in this relationship.

And that's why they don't belong together.

That's why they're not worth it all.

A forced marriage will never be a happy one for them at least.

And he saw her walking away from him.

So apna apna rasta

hansi-khushi badal diya

wo apni rah chal padi

main apni rah chal diya

Hamza Sayyed watched Mishkhat Khawar walking away from him.

Mishkhat Khawar gave him the last smile only to never look back at him.

And he didn't stop her, he couldn't.

And she didn't stay, she couldn't.

They were crazy lovers once.

They were happy once.

But they aren't anymore.

So they walked away from each other.

With pain and regret.

With smiles and tears.

And that's the end of the story.

Hamza Syyed and Mishkhat Khawar had a love story, never a happily ever after.

But they have hope, they will be happy one day, in their lives so what if not together.

Wo afsana jise anjam tak lana na ho mumkin

use ek khub-surat mod de kar chhodna achchha

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