"Won't you have breakfast again?" I heard mom speak as I reached the bottom of the stairs.

"Ah no. I'll head to school now." The sound of Jennie's voice breaks my heart. I can feel her sorrow through her pain. She's been like this since that day and I can't blame her. It is really a bitter pill to swallow. However, Mom and dad still doesn't know that Jennie and I already know.

"Bye mom. Bye dad." I kissed both of their cheeks gently and went after Jennie. But before I could take another step, I felt a soft grip on my arm.

I looked back and saw mom's eyes pleading me to tell them what's going on. I wanted to tell her but then again, it's not my story to tell.

Instead of speaking, I softly removed her hand from my arm and looked at her in the eyes. It's like me saying that it's not my place and the time isn't just right. Fortunately, she gave in and nodded.

I hurriedly walked out the door and head towards my car. There, I saw her sitting quietly on the passenger's seat, for another quiet ride.

As I got in, I put my seatbelt on and made sure that she got hers as well. She's looking outside the window so I can't see her face but I can tell that she's silently crying, her moving shoulder says it all.

"Hey." I softly started and grabbed her hand that was previously resting on her lap. I wasn't actually expecting any reactions from her so I was surprised when she looked back at me and held my hand that is holding hers.

Looking at her face, I feel my heart aching once more. Her eyes that used to be full of light and happiness are now replaced by nothing but sorrow. Her eyes scream pain and sadness. She's been crying for days that made her feline eyes puffy. Bags under it are also noticeable. But even in this condition, I still find her breathtaking.

I held her face with my other hand and brushed her tears away. I can't stand seeing her cry.

"Nini, I just want you to know that I still got your back and I would always be here for you. So don't cry anymore. I won't leave you alone." I felt her lean into my touch that made my heart flutter. "You'll never be alone."

•••

It's now lunch time. Students are running all over the place like a mad man. Beginnings of classes, lunch, and dismissals really turn the hallways into a jungle full of wild animals. It's scary but you'll get used to it.

I'm walking my way over to the cafeteria with Lisa and Rosé. Jisoo unnie and Jennie are probably in our table already.

Days have passed yet my friends still don't know what happened the night Jennie went missing. Jennie is not ready for that so who am I to speak about it?

I opened the door leading to the cafeteria and a gush of wind went past me. What's with this effect?

I looked in front of me and students are still running from one end to the other. So this is why there was a strong wind.

The three of us struggled to walk past the crazy students just to get to our table.

"Watch out!" I heard a yell coming from behind. As I looked back, a tall and muscular guy was running on full speed towards us. At that moment, I felt as if we were in a movie. The guy was coming closer and closer and he can't seem to stop the speed. I looked beside me and my eyes widened. Lisa is at the spot where the guy is heading to.

"Noooo." Lisa spoke in a cute little voice, fear mixed in it. Her eyes are widened just like mine.

So before the guy crashes into her, I pulled Lisa into me. The surroundings seemed to change as to now, Lisa is twirling towards me in a slow pace, it's as if we were dancing, just like in the movies. And when the time went back to its normal pace, Lisa and I are now standing in front of each other. My arm wrapped around her waist and her hand resting on my chest.

I don't know what got into me when my eyes shifted down to her lips, her soft plump lips. I don't know why at that moment, I felt the urge to feel her lips against mine, just like that time when we were in the trunk of my car.

Gravity seemed to be working hard right now since I found myself leaning towards her. I was in a daze. Nothing around us is real. It's just the two of us.

But the kiss never happened when a cough, an obnoxious cough, was heard. Out of reflex, I instantly let Lisa go, her twirling once again but this time, away from me. But I still held her hand tightly fearing that she'll stumble down.

I looked at the culprit who stopped me from kissing my best friend and I saw my other best friend, Rosé.

"I don't know what's with you two but my stomach is grumbling really bad now. So if you don't mind, and I don't care if you mind, let's head to our table now and eat." With that, she left Lisa and I standing in the middle of the crowded cafeteria.

I followed her retreating figure and saw a pair of feline eyes looking as if she's about to bury someone with how intense she looks. That sight sent shivers down my spine. I mean it's not probably for me because I am not doing anything to make her mad at me but I can't shake the feeling that she wants to bury me alive.

"Hey. Ah uhm, let's go." Lisa stuttered as she tugged my hand. I looked back at her and saw her beet red cheeks. Right. That's probably how my cheeks look like too.

The two of us reached our table with our friends busy on their food. At least Jisoo unnie and Chaeng are. Jennie looked at the both of us and stared, more like glared, at Lisa and I's intertwined hands.

Seeing that, the both of us instantly let go of each other and quietly sat side by side.

The four of us ate quietly. I am thanking the heavens above that no one was speaking about Lisa and I's almost shared kiss because I wouldn't know what to do nor say if that was brought up.

"Woah Y/N. I can't believe that you didn't introduce your girlfriend to me. I'm hurt." The familiar voice spoke and saw my other best boy pal, Jackson, sitting on my other side. He had his hand on his chest pretending to be hurt and a puppy face.

I squinted my eyes at him and that's when I realized something. I started hitting him as he tried to defend himself.

"What? What's wrong with you?" He crossed his arms over his chest to prevent me from hitting him more.

"What's wrong with me? You're the jerk who was running like a damn bull in this damn cafeteria. What do you think this place is? A fucking track field? You almost knocked Lisa over!"

"Ah mianhae." This jerk had the audacity to act all cute and shit when he put Lisa in danger.

"Pabo." I hit his forehead, let's say pretty hard, that he almost fell down the bench.

"You shouldn't be running around like that. You're a harm in society." I glared at him and he just chuckled.

"Sorry okay? I just had a couple of chocolates before lunch. Physics teacher was boring as fuck so I had to eat chocolates to keep myself awake."

Jackson gets super hyper whenever he eats too much chocolate. He's always been that way and I knew about that when I met this silly guy when I was a freshman. He is a year older than me but him and are like siblings from another mother that I don't bother calling him oppa anymore. Besides, anyone would have mistaken me to be the older one since he really acts like a kid most of the time. But that's one of the things that I love about him. He may be childish but at times when I need him, he always got my back. No one messes with me not only because they know that I can take them down but also because they'd be facing Jackson too if that happens. And facing him when he's mad is like facing the son of satan. He's that scary.

"Anyway, why didn't you introduce Lisa to me?" He asked once again after taking a bite from his sandwich.

I looked at him like he has two heads because why would I need to introduce Lisa to him? When his roommate Bambam, is Lisa's best friend.

"What are you on? You know Lisa." I stated and continued eating my pasta.

"I mean yes I know Lisa as your best friend. But I don't know Lisa as your girlfriend." Hearing that, I choked on my food.

I coughed and coughed until I felt a pat on my back and water being offered my way. I looked at the good samaritan and saw Lisa with concerned eyes and a blushing cheeks once again. "Th-thank you."

"No problem." She smiled and a smile formed on my face as well.

A snicker caught my attention and it was Jackson.

"What? L-lisa is n-not my g-g-girlfriend." I mentally hit myself as I found my stuttering embarrassing.

Jackson smirked and raised one of his brows. "Really? Because from what I saw a while ago, you almost kissed her. You almost smashed your lips against hers in the middle of this cafeteria." I mentally made a note to myself to kill this guy later on.

My cheeks felt like it was burning. My ears were like set on fire. My palms and forehead are sweating badly. I could tell that the girl beside me shares the same state as mine considering the fact that she became so quiet and I see her rubbing her palms on her jeans under the table.

"Hm. Whatever you say, Kim." Fucking Jackson spoke once again. I swear, I won't let him see another sun.

What is this feeling? Why did my heart ache at the sight of Y/N and Lisa almost kissing? Why is my heart breaking when I see them blushing because of what Jackson said? Why do I feel like crying?

I'm aware that I have been this way before. I was jealous before whenever Y/N is with Lisa or someone else rather than being with me. But why does it hurt 100x more now? Why does my heart shatter into a million more pieces now? Why is it this way?

Does knowing the truth caused this pain? Does knowing that I can be with Y/N now hurt more? Why? I should be happy because now, what I am feeling is no longer forbidden.

But looking at them hurts more than I could ever imagine.

Thinking back to what happened at school a while ago and what Jackson said made my heart beat so fast against my chest.

I have only felt this way whenever I am with Jennie. But a while ago was different. We barely talked. So what's with this fast beating heart?

I held my chest as I looked up at my bedroom's ceiling. "Why are you being this way heart?"

What's wrong with me? I am so confused. Why does Lisa now make the same effect that Jennie has on me? How did it happen? When did this start?

I don't understand anything. I am lost. I should be happy and pursue Jennie now. But why do I feel like I am trapped?

I closed my eyes and a tear fell down. Now why did I just tear up?

My mind is full of questions. But one remained in my head before I fell asleep.

———