Hazou’s eyes were naturally drawn up to his old room in the barracks. A mental picture the spartan accommodations came easily to mind (“IT BUILDS CHARACTER, YOU UNGRATEFUL MAGGOTS,” he recalled hearing far too many times) and he idly hoped they would have been spruced up somewhat for the Exams.

The crowd of Leaf nin -- more than a dozen teams in all, and Hazou had never even seen the ones outside the ‘rookie squad’ before the group took off from Leaf -- marched in through the main doors to be greeted by a demure brown-haired woman in a sash with the kanji for each of the major elemental nations.

“Welcome, honored guests,” she said, bowing formally. “Your rooms are at the far end of the hall to your left, one floor up. There is one room set aside per team, but you are of course free to establish whatever sleeping arrangements you wish.”

Hazou managed to stop himself from glancing over at Akane. Barely. Instead he simply marched over to the stairwell.

...​

Team Gōketsu was in the middle of thoroughly sweeping their chosen room for seals and Kozo body-bits when Hazou got a much better idea and paused. “Noburi, would you be willing to go ask one of the Hyuuga if they’d be willing to check all the rooms?”

“Hm. Good call,” Noburi agreed, heading to the door.

“AAAAH!” he shouted not five seconds later.

Hazou and Keiko were through the door before either of them even realized it, kunai drawn, directional explosives pointed opposite directions down the hallway. Hazou happened to be facing away from where Noburi had walked, and so heard rather than saw Noburi fall to the ground, his forehead protector actually doing its job for once as it slammed against the polished wooden floor.

“P-please accept my apologies, Lady Hyuuga!” Noburi stammered.

Hazou blinked, and then slowly lowered his stance and turned to look at his friend. And now brother, actually, he mused. Noburi was on his knees in front of a half-open door, the visible part of his face rapidly approaching potentially dangerous levels of blushing.

“Oh, ah, sorry, give me just one second!” came Hinata’s voice from inside the room. A couple of seconds later she opened the door all the way, wrapped in a towel that looked so luxurious that Hazou could feel his wallet getting lighter just looking at it. “Is everything alright, Gōketsu?”

Noburi sat up slightly, still looking at the floor. “I’m really sorry, Hyuuga, I didn’t mean to invade your privacy. Kiba and Shino didn’t mention you’d be changing, it didn’t occur to me to knock.”

She waved away his apology. “Ah, please don’t worry about it! The Byakugan means we Hyuuga tend to... care less about privacy, for various reasons.”

As Hazou digested the implications of that statement and resolved to move mobile versions of the privacy seals as far up on the research queue as possible, Hinata looked over the still-armed ninja in the hallway and asked, “Did you need something from me in particular, or...?”

“We, uh, we were hoping you would be willing to help us sweep for seals around the barracks. And also eyeballs and ears, there’s a Mist clan, Kozo, that can detach parts of themselves and they like to use that ability for spying,” Noburi explained, finally starting to stand up and looking absolutely anywhere except the girl in front of him.

“Oh, yes, of course,” Hinata nodded. “My cousin and I did a sweep as soon as we all arrived, and neither of us spotted any seals, but there was a young man up on the roof who had suspended an eyeball with his own chakra in it on a piece of twine. He was moving it around between windows, so we figured it was some kind of scouting technique.” Her expression darkened. “I had Kiba grab it when it got to our room, he and Shino are off to see if they can find anything fun to do with it. Kozo, huh? Good to know.”

Hazou didn’t bother to suppress his shudder.

“Anyway,” Hinata continued, suddenly brightening again. “I was off to take a quick real bath instead of the field wash we had earlier, and I just realized I need someone to pair up with to follow the Hokage’s order about staying in pairs. Would you be willing to go with me, Gōketsu?” she asked, looking at Keiko.

“I--wha, HUH?” Noburi blurted out, his head snapping toward Hinata, who looked at him silently for a second, looked briefly at Keiko, and then looked back at Noburi, before starting to laugh.

“Sorry! I don’t mean to make fun of you, I suppose that was bound to get awfully confusing,” she said, still giggling. “I know we haven’t known each other long, but would it be alright if we used each other’s first names, at least when you’re all together like this? Just to make things simpler.”

Noburi nodded mutely, as did Hazou. Keiko hesitated, and Hinata immediately threw up both hands toward her. “Ah, please don’t worry about it if you’re uncomfortable with it! And anyway, if the boys are okay with first names, then it’ll be clear who I mean when I say Gōketsu, so it’s fine!”

The aforementioned boys had immediately found very interesting things to investigate up on the ceiling. Keiko looked down at the towel Hinata had dropped in her gesticulating, and raised an eyebrow. “I’ll go get changed as well, I suppose,” she said simply.

...​

After the girls had gone off, Hazou and Noburi walked over the room Akane’s team had settled into. As Hazou was raising his hand to knock, the murmur of conversation within exploded into a heated exchange.

"HOW many explosives?" one female voice exclaimed. Not Akane, so Hazou presumed it was Haruno.

"Only a few hundred," he heard Akane reply

"Are you SHITTING me?" Haruno asked, clearly incensed. Hazou and Noburi looked at each other, concerned.

"Yeah, I know, I'm sorry. I hope it'll be enough."

"You- wh- huh?!"

“I mean, as long as we budget them, it should be fine, right? And we’ll have the month-long break to get more, once we get past the early part of the Exams!”

“Your whole team is insane,” groaned Haruno. “What else have you got?”

"Well, this one is something the Lord Hokage referred to as a 'Banshee Fucker', an upgraded version of the earbusters. He was apparently very insistent that it be used as far away as possible from anyone whose lungs we didn't want turned into jelly."

There were a few moments of silence. Noburi and Hazou leaned into the door.

"What?" Akane asked.

"You're a seduction specialist. That's the only explanation. Gōketsu Mari must have trained you.”

"WHAT???" Akane practically shrieked, mirroring Hazou’s thoughts exactly.

"Why else would the Hokage's son be throwing this much money at you? He's trying to impress you, to get you into his bed!"

"H- Hazō would never do that! He just wants me to be safe! And he wants my teammates, including you, to be successful, so you could maybe at least show a little gratitude! And besides, this isn't really that mu--"

"SAGE’S BALLSACK, WOMAN, this stack of paper includes more explosives than I’ve ever seen and specialized seals drawn by the legendary sealmaster Jiraiya of the Three, who also happens to be HOKAGE! Do you know how many YEARS of a normal ninja’s income--"

The door was unceremoniously yanked open, and the eavesdroppers very nearly collided with the silent third member of Akane’s team, Haru Yamamoto. “Hi guys,” he said flatly.

“Eh? Oh, Hazou! What’s up?” Akane asked, not missing a beat.

“Uh, well, um, we were coming by to see if you guys would like to come with us on a tour of the city, and then we heard you guys arguing, and… um….” Hazou stuttered.

“And then you spied on us,” Haruno concluded, arching one eyebrow.

“Ninja,” Noburi said, shrugging nonchalantly. “Do you wanna come or not?”