After inviting Eduine and Aura - who turned up with Tilly and Kat, to dinner, Edwan and his men settled down even further than the dragons could take them. They weren't just peaceful anymore they were now understanding.

Explaining the situation far better than I did, Aura, Tilly and Kat, explain how relations between species work around here. No hate, no animosity, only jovial neighbours who might happen to turn into Goblins after drinking a Lucinda special.

That solicited more than a few raised eyebrows, but was played down after its cooldown time was revealed.

In no hurtful way and in the interest of fun, a few patrons had spiked a few ales at Talia's the other week and half the Tavern had turned green. Not the sickly type but the ugly, little bastard kind. Even with my own aversion to Goblins, I still found the humorous side to that incident. It's a shame Light's in Orad because that would have been even funnier.

With Aura and Eduine on delegation duty, I got to finish my meal. Blondie was with the elves so it went quite quietly too. I feel like I really deserved that meal.

After the elves had been fed, they looked much happier and were more reluctant to stay. Eduine and Katrina took them to get settled at the Privacy Palace where both of them reside. The Inn is a feature that was placed a long time ago. Other than the homeless elf and the apprentice, the building doesn't see much in the way of special customers other than passing merchants.

Everyone else owns their own home and is living the dream. That said, I need to give Kolena her own place. She can't stay on the tower with us every night. Bear's one thing, but a Goddess whose title I stole by accident is another. I've got to draw the line somewhere. Although, maybe I should offer the same to the triplets? Maybe they don't want to stay in my tower but are too bashful to say so.

No. Maybe it was that way before, but not that they've got that pinch of rebellion in them, I doubt that would be the case. Still it's better to ask.

"Since you three are... older? Bigger? Since you've evolved, do you want your homes?" I ask while trying to keep my shit together.

The girls look at each other before shaking their heads.

"Are you trying to kick us out?" Amber looks upset that I asked. Even though I was asking for their benefit.

"Why would we want that?" Blondie questions my question which isn't really helpful.

"If it's because of Bear's size, he can shrink down. He has a skill for that." Whereas Violet tells me some crucial information that I would have liked to have known before.

"No, Amber. I'm not kicking you out. Blondie, I thought you might want more space now you're growing and you don't have to go anywhere if you don't want to. Violet... Why the hell don't you shrink Bear down at night times if he can do that? I see how much futon you get. You may as well be laying on the floor."

"Can I stay in your tower?" From behind, a hopeful voice perks up and I speak before thinking.

"No. You get to have your own house, Kolena. No offence, but my tower is only big enough for one God. Thank you very much." That and I might be slightly worried about her stabbing me in the back to reclaim her title. Not that doing so would grant her what she desired. She would have to take out my Core to truly kill me and that isn't an easy feat. Behind tens of thousands of Goblins, trolls and my family members who prefer sanctuary's sun to that of the real deal, my Core is safe and sound from potential threats.

That said, even if someone managed to invade my dungeon and make it all the way to the bottom, I could move my core to any of the three cities I control. They are now just as much a part of me as everything that dwells below and around the mountain.

The former Goddess of Beauty looks a little dejected at my statement, but that's unfortunate. My tower isn't big enough to house the egos of Bear, three Rebellion Dragons and a jealous Goddess as well as myself. Hell, it's hardly big enough for me alone sometimes.

After a slow walk to settle my meal, we arrived at Kolena's house. The single-floor structure looks identical to the rest and she doesn't seem very pleased with its appearance. Which is tough shit really because we don't do status or nobility around these parts. If anything, I'm looking to abolish that system completely in a few years. I don't need to be adding to it now.

"You can't have a bigger building, I'm sorry. Everyone is equal in Varona so you have to live with it." I try to be stern with Goddess, but she pouts and turns to me before saying, "But it's orange."

Oh. Now I get it. The colourless Kolena isn't happy because of the size or appearance of the feature. Instead, she's out off by its colour.

Like I said, another weirdo.

After a quick colour change, the building is a pristine white and Kolena looks delighted. She said nothing, sprinting inside before I could say another word. I mean, white does look good. Maybe I should make the other homes the same? It doesn't cost me anything to alter their colour after all and I don't really want Kolena's building standing out as though she's better than others.

I shout inside to let Kolena know we'll meet her for breakfast in the morning before porting us to my tower.

"First things first. Violet, shrink him." I look towards the purple-haired Rebellion Dragon and she rolls her eyes before doing as I asked. Thank the Core it was that easy. All I want to do is create a little something special for him.

Bear's size shrinks down until he resembles the cub he once was.

How cute. No. Don't get distracted.

At which point, I created him his own little futon. Personalised with his own little bear face on it. I know I was just harping on about equality, but Violet's pet doesn't really fall into that equation. Not yet anyway. By this point next year, he'll probably have evolve into some type of stupid bear-man knowing my luck.

What will I do if that happens? She damn well can't go round riding on him in public. Either way, both Bear and Violet are extremely happy with their new sleeping arrangements. Violet gets her own space back and Bear still gets to be comfortable. It would have been solved a long time ago if she would have told me he could shrink down.

Amber is laying on her own futon, barely paying attention as she munches out. Even after a full day of eating the redhead still seems to have room for more. Blondie, however, has disappeared once again. The chatty Dragon hasn't gone far though as I can still sense her. In fact, she's less than a hundred feet away at the Privacy Palace talking to Edwan.

With my triplets taking care of themselves, I decide to spend the rest of my accumulated DP on speed purchasing land. It'll only be a few hours until the farm fills me up anyway so there's no need to hold back. With that said, I begin heading west. Buying land and porting to the other side before repeating the action continuously. Through the forest I go out into the open evening of the countryside. Across rivers, fields and farmland, I progress further west than I ever travelled while I was still human.

I kept going until there was only a few thousand DP left in the bank. The sun had set and I was exhausted. Not physically, but mentally. The constant acquisitions had taken it out of me and I was ready to hit the hay.

Hay!

How many times am I going to forget about that damn Bale?

With nothing demanding my attention and the idea at the forefront of my mind, I arrive at the Bale of Fortune. The ring of hay bales I placed around the feature are still standing strong and give the solitary bale in the middle a little oomph...

Alright, it's just hay sitting around more hay, but after it's last and only upgrade all the bale did was marginally increase in size. I had to do something. At least this way you have to walk inside to pray to the Lord of Hay.

Putting my best foot forward, I walk through the opening and place my hand on the featureless feature. Silently, I cast a prayer.

After a few seconds of waiting and no new notifications from Sis, I voice my wish instead.

"I wish I had Divinity's Sight."

Still nothing. No genie lord. No notifications. Just me standing alone in a circle of hay talking to myself.

I still hate this feature. Why is it so damn awkward?

Everything else does exactly what they say they do in their descriptions. This thing though...

The Bale Of Fortune:

Any animal fed this Hay can keep running four-times longer than normal permanently

Any animal fed this Hay will be able to walk on water permanently

Any trade deals negotiated in or with your city will be 50% more beneficial to you

Those who offer a prayer to the Bale of Fortune before departing your city will be blessed with bountiful luck and see a 75% increase to their spoils

The Lord of Hay may grant wishes to the pure of heart

Unique Skill:

Immortality

Don't get me started on how the Bale of Fortune is Immortal. That's something I still can't wrap my head around.

Coincidentally, Immortality is one of the skills I see while testing my skills at night. Unsurprisingly, my own version is still level one and I have no idea how to use it. Not that I've put any effort into trying, but you would have thought after having three bodies destroyed during the war - my soul being in each and every one of them, that it would have at least hit level two.

Either way, in its description the word wishes is clearly written down. Not wish, but wishes. Plural. Also, it's not like I've suddenly had a change of heart. I'm still trying to save the Gods damn world after all, so where the hell is my Divinity's Sight?

Stop being so shady Lord of Hay and grant my damn wish.

After a few more unsuccessful attempts, I gave up in defeat. I really do hate this feature. It doesn't upgrade properly and it doesn't function correctly either. It's just a piece of junk.

Honestly, I wish being a Dungeon Core was easier sometimes.

Dungeon Protocol 2 has been initiated:

Voice-Activated User Notification and Help System is being implemented...

Aww fuck off.

It hasn't said so, but I know damn well that my last unspoken wish is being carried out by the Lord of Hay right now. Funnily enough, I'm sure I've seen that user notification system message somewhere before. I just can't remember where.

All of a sudden Sis starts shouting across the dungeon link. Demanding to know what I'm doing to her as I'm forcing programs to bend to my will. Not that any of it's intentional. All I wanted was Divinity's Sight and I'm pretty sure that's not what I'm getting.

Error...

A Voice-Activated User Notification and Help System has already been attached to the current Dungeon Core

New system is unable to merge with host

Protocol aborted

That was rather anticlimactic.

Guess I'm not getting whatever that system was then. Although, it did say I already have one. Nevermind, it would probably be more work knowing this thing.

The Lord of Hay is rewriting current System parameters...

Please wait...

Er...

Not only is Sis still begging to know what's going on, but Me has also decided to chime in. Neither of them are helping me read the flowing text though, so I blank them out to keep going.

Reconfiguration in progress...

System designation: Error...

Rectifying...

System designation: Sis (Type one dungeon creation and betterment system)

Owner: Abi, Goddess of The Dungeon, Goddess of Beauty, Goddess of the Hay

Voice-Activated User Notification and Help System has been found

Editing parameters...

I started to get a little worried at that point as Me was getting louder and louder. Almost drowning out sis who was now screaming about me being impossibly infuriating.

That's my line. And what the hell is that title about?

... New parameters have been defined and accepted

Measures have been put in place to accommodate for new subsystems and a second Voice-Activated User Notification and Help System

Now I remember what that system is. Its infuriatingly long name reminds me of the time I had no body and was a wailing wreck. At the very beginning of my second life there was a help system that helped guide me through my depression. It helped explain the ins and outs of dungeon'in all while taking the brunt of my foul mood and attitude.

How could I possibly forget the crazy bastard shouting over our link?

How could I forget about Me?