Chapter 125

Knowing Your Limits: A Doctoral Thesis

There comes a time in life when we all realize we have met our limits. That mental point where we have gone to the ends of what we are personally capable of and must accept the fact that we cannot go any further.

As it turns out, I apparently reached my limit after my first temple run. Well, I found my limit in terms of the number of classes I can have.

The consensus was two regular classes. By this, we meant any two from the following three categories: Magic, Psychic, or Physical.

Día’s and my own personal working hypothesis was two regular classes, and one rare class. Or at least one rare class. That is what we have taken to calling my Spirit Class, it is a rare class that requires its own attribute and own set of powers.

The good news was, that everyone from our team now had the maximum number of classes. The bad news was, we realized we would likely need more people if we were going to find out what other types of classes might be possible from other hidden temples.

Also, there was what was referred to as the delayed-awakening stigma.

“So far our working hypothesis is,” Día began, as she started documenting our findings. As it turns out, not only is Día incredibly beautiful, but she is also incredibly intelligent. Not only is she using this trip to get rich, but she is also using this trip as a cheap way to get her Doctorate. “the delayed-awakening stigma is the theory that a person loses half of their potential for a particular brand of class, after they finish their trial run.”

“What does losing half of one’s potential mean when it comes to a class? Simple. Every person has the chance to learn a total of eight different effects related to any category of class they learn. Furthermore, this is broken down into certain milestones. For instance, one can only unlock the first four powers from their initial trials. The remaining four must be awoken with additional certs. These additional…”

She droned on, recording herself over and over again, until she got the perfect run. Of course, she made sure I was there, constantly pointing out flaws in what she was saying. At first there were quite a few misconceptions, but after time we got it cleared up. She even corrected me on a few things that I had wrong as well. Well, they weren’t wrong, but never fully flushed out in my mind.

Basically, she noted how of five through eight were the final stages that one should unlock, either from an exceptional trial run, or by gaining additional certs from their particular class so they could then unlock the final four power slots.

“Of course, none of this even compares to the cost of Personal Power versus Level Power. 4,049 is the number of certs needed to both unlock a particular class with the Omega rating, while also gaining the final four powers for that particular class. This might seem like a reasonable amount to spend, especially considering you have now made yourself twice as powerful. But I pose this to you. You could also use those same certs to buy levels for your class. With 4,014 certs you can purchase your way up to level 90, which at Omega class would translate to thirty attribute points, all of which could go to Power, making you a proverbial juggernaut for your class. So then what is more important doubling the amount of powers you can wield with mediocre capabilities, or, tripling your potential? I say, why not have both.” There it was the sales pitch within her own Doctoral Thesis.

I had to hand it to her, she was impressive.

The worst part about this whole thing, was that she was giving me half credit for everything. I was after all her personal lab rat on this. Of course, having a degree from an alternate universe is the equivalent of having a million fun bucks to spend outside of an amusement park. Even if I was recognized, this recognition would ultimately be meaningless.

Now even with those protests out of the way, it was still nice to be listed as the co-author of her thesis. This way, should I ever get the gumption to get my own undergraduate degree, then a masters, then follow in Día’s chosen field for a doctorate, I would be a shoe-in. Yeah, that is right up there with jello wrestling with polar bears, sounds fun to talk about, but insanely tough and taxing to do.

Of course, why would I do such a thing in an alternate universe, even knowing that I would effectively have to repeat the same exact efforts in my own universe, to then get a degree that would only be recognized in human space? No clue. Again, I might seem lazy, which I am. But I like to think of this as an economical allocation of my mental resources.

“Oh, wait. That was no good.” Día said, looking shocked.

“What? That was perfect.” I answered.

“No, you weren’t playing in the background.”

Sigh.

That was the other thing. Día now recorded all of her sessions with me setting the cadence with my own music in the background. At first she said it was a pacing thing, but clearly this last recording showed that she didn’t need the musical assistance.

Still, what else were we going to do on our many hours of flight time between galaxies.

Pulling out my violin, I do a quick sound check. Then begin playing a light melody in the background.

As soon as she hears me start to play, she breaths in, then breathes out. In a second she is calmer and once again more than ready to begin again.

This time she does work through things at a remarkably faster cadence. I have taken these times to speed up the pacing of my songs, if only to see the way she invariably feels the need to keep up with my cadence.

At first it was a game, one that I thought she would be angry with. Basically the way to think of what I was doing was, I would start out at regular speed, but slowly over time speed up until we were at one and a half times faster by the end.

To me it was a game, but to Día it was a way to keep people listening through her entire speech.

Finally, once it was all over, Día ended her recording and nodded to herself.

“Thank you for that.”

“No problem.” I replied, as I began putting my violin back in its case.

“You know, you could probably get a degree in musical theory.”

I just shook my head, “Why? So, people can see that I can read sheet music? No thank you.”

“Gah.”

“What?”

“You just have this amazing gift.”

“I mean, not to brag, but I am pretty good at a lot of things.” I admit humbly, only half joking.

“No!” Día says as she stomps her foot in frustration. “You have been given this gift. You can go anywhere, do anything. Why not apply yourself.”

“So people can tell me I know what I know? I don’t really need the validation of others at this point.”

“This is not just about getting a degree. This is about so much more…”

Día and I have had these conversations on and off for a while. Ultimately, it comes down to the fact that I don’t have enough personal drive in my life. I don’t have a true purpose, and it frustrates her.

Honestly, it frustrates me too, the only problem is I don’t know how to get this all to stop.

“You just need to get out of your own way. You are great at so many things. Almost too many things if you ask me. That is probably part of your problem.”

“My problem?”

“Yeah, don’t you get it.” She began, but then paused. “I am probably not saying this correctly, so please bear with me.”

Silence.

“You have the chance to do anything in this universe, or even your universe. I even get the fact that you are probably afraid to do to much, for fear that you might break something. Well, I want you to think about it, you saved these universes. Saved them, from abominations that I can only imagine. Abominations that still frighten your Jess, even in her Temple induced coma.”

Badump.

At that, I realize I might have gone too far. “Am I torturing her?” I ask, a faint trail of fear filling my words as I wonder if I am just creating even more tension than is necessary. What if I travel the universe to save her, only to find out that she has been eaten alive by her nightmares of what we faced off against? Is that fair to her?

“What?” Día paused for a moment, then thought about my question. “No, well not really. At least I don’t think so. She was still frightened by the abomination, but that was only the memory she had of fighting the monsters. Most of her dreams are of…” She trailed off.

“Of?”

“Well, you. How you were a jerk to her, but somehow you were also able to grab her attention right away.” Jess admitted.

With that I nod to myself.

“So, what do you suggest?”

“I don’t know. Find something, a cause. Find anything. Find something you want to apply yourself to and do it. I will be with you every step of the way. But what happens if we don’t find a cure right away? What if it takes us years to find what you are looking for?”

At that, I pause.

She is correct. I have my whole life, well multiple lives really to find a cure for both Jesses. I don’t need to do everything right now. Also, even right this moment, while we are literally hurling our way through space to the next destination I remember finding, I could be doing something else. I could be applying myself more, I could be doing something more with my life than just pining for Jess.

“Look, I…”

“You’re right.”

“What?”

“You’re right.”

At that Día just smiled wide. “I’m sorry could you say that one more time?”

“What is this? Trying to summon the boogieman by getting me to say the same thing three times in a row?”

“No, just trying to get you to acknowledge that someone other than you was correct for once.” Día says, a faint playful smirk taking out most of the sting from her words.

“So what would you suggest?” I finally ask after a few minutes of contemplation.

At that Día just shakes her head. “Nope. This is all you. You need to find your own motivations. I get it, you saved not just one universe, but three. Now you are trying to see what else can live up to that. Honestly nothing can. But you are literally just wasting your time in between these missions. You could be doing so much. Heck, even writing down your adventures could be a good use of your time.”

“Becoming a writer? That sounds so boring.”

“I know, but people have done crazier things. Look, just think about it. Try to find what you think will motivate you to continue going forward, then do it.”

A pause.

“I will be here for you as always if you need help. But you need to find a way to push yourself. Make it so you will never be in a position where you need a person like me again. I can’t say that I’m not happy that our paths crossed. Had it not been for you, I would be.” She shuddered for a moment. “Well I would have been with your brother for one, then for another I would not have had the chance to go on this trip of the universe, nor to get my own doctorate. These are goals from my bucket list, that I can mark off at twenty-six.”

“Bucket list?”

“Yeah, the list of things you do before you die.”

“I know what they are, but what is the point of having them if you are going to live forever?”

Día just shook her head. “To this point, you haven’t been living, just existing.” She paused, then putting her finger to her lips she said. “You know, you are right. Maybe for you, we should call yours a living list. What are the things you should do, to say that you actually lived. The things that will show the universe that you actually matter.”

I opened my mouth to speak, but Día just cut me off by holding up one slender finger.

“Nope. Don’t say anything, just think about it.”

With that I was dismissed form Día’s personal quarters and left to think about my life. My infinite life that seemed to be a waste. Something I decided I would work on, though I did make a vow to never admit to Día that she was correct.