《Before I Forget - Eli Moskowitz -》Rabbit Hole
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Rickenberger won't be bothering u again
Sky stared at the message on her phone for a couple of heartbeats, forgetting to breathe.
It was from Hawk. It was the first text she had gotten from him in a week, the first since the breakup. Hawk had respected Sky's wishes and had not tried to call or text, had not sent her desperate love letters, had not shown up under her window crying and begging her to take him back. Even when he had talked to her in class today, he had kept his distance and hadn't tried to apologize or beg for another chance.
Sky had a feeling it meant that Hawk realized he had fucked up so monumentally that there was no point in apologizing. Sky would never take him back and they both knew it.
So to receive a text like this from him was... bizarre. It left Sky shaken and annoyed. She was pretty sure Hawk was expecting she texted back to ask what he meant, but she sure as Hell wasn't going to do that. She had told him very clearly that he should let it go, that it wasn't his damn business, but the look on Hawk's face when he had left the classroom and had gone after Rickenberger was still haunting Sky.
Her thumbs hovered over the screen and she bit her lip. Maybe she should just ask Hawk what had happened. Maybe she should call him, and–
And what? Do I really want to fall down that rabbit hole again?
"Sky, is everything okay?" asked Sam, who was sitting next to her at the table.
Startled, Sky looked up from her phone, realizing it was still the lunch break and she was sitting in the cafeteria with her friends, her untouched couscous salad in a bowl on the table in front of her. She had forgotten to breathe while reading Hawk's message and now she felt light-headed, out of place, as if there was a wind blowing right through her.
"Yeah, it was nothing," Sky replied, stuffed her phone back into her pocket, and turned her attention back to her meal, but her appetite was gone. She could only think about Hawk, the sharp line of his jaw, the darkness in his eyes when he had glanced at her before leaving the classroom.
"You sure about that?" Sam asked with a frown. "You look pale."
"Yeah, it's just—" She stopped talking and glanced at the table where Hawk usually sat with his friends. That table was empty now, there were no Cobras in the whole cafeteria and Sky didn't know what to make of that.
Why do I even care? This is exactly what he wanted when he texted me. I shouldn't have even read that thing. I should have blocked his number.
"Is this about what happened in the English class?" asked Moon, leaning closer with a sympathetic look on her sweet face.
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"How do you know about that?"
"I heard it from Maya," Moon replied. "You remember Maya? She's in the cheerleading team, and has English with you."
"Oh, yeah, I think so." Sky had a vague memory of a pretty, blond girl whose mouth always seemed to be too busy with bubblegum to form words. "Wait, what did she tell you? And when?"
"I ran into her on my way here," Moon explained. "And she told me the boys were calling you names in the class. She felt really awful about it."
Sky let out a desperate groan and leaned her elbows on the table to hide her face in her hands.
"Great. This is just great. So, everyone knows?"
"I don't know," Sam said sharply. "What are you talking about?"
Sky sighed and slumped back in her chair, her appetite completely gone now. She picked up her fork and started to push the couscous and the pieces of chicken back and forth in the bowl, as she told Sam a short version of what had happened.
"Doug said what?" Sam asked, clearly furious, when Sky had finished.
"You heard me," Sky muttered, keeping her eyes down. "But he only said what everyone's thinking. They all know I'm a slut who sells ass in the Janitor's closet."
The frown on Sam's forehead deepened, but it was Moon who spoke. She laid her hand softly on Sky's flannel-covered arm as comfort and gave her a sweet, kind smile.
"Sweetie, don't say things like that. It doesn't matter what people think - you had sex with your boyfriend. That's not a crime. You shouldn't be ashamed of it."
"Moon is right, people are idiots," Sam noted darkly. "This is just like the stupid rumor about me and Kyler last year - I still can't believe people bought that."
"Me neither. But it obviously wasn't true—" Sky muttered and dropped her fork in the bowl. "— unlike this one. Talk about the double standards, though. Everyone thinks Hawk is a stud, but they keep calling me a whore and a slut. What am I supposed to do with that?"
"You should've punched Doug in his stupid face," Sam snapped. "That's what you should have done."
"In the middle of the class?" Sky arched a brow. "Besides, I can't get into fights anymore, you know that."
Sam looked embarrassed. Red spots emerged on her round cheeks. "Sorry, I didn't mean to—"
"It's fine," Sky said with a wave of her hand. "Really, don't worry about it."
But of course, it wasn't really fine and she hated that she was reminded of it all the time. Her now cast-free arm was still weak and strengthless, and she still couldn't lift her right foot higher than a couple of inches, which made walking hard and slow. But the worst part was the head. Her red curls might be covering the scars now, but the real damage lay a lot deeper.
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"What did the doctors say?" asked Moon, realizing what the other girls were talking about. "Didn't you have a check-up yesterday?"
"Well, they gave me a bunch of physiotherapy exercises that will bore me to death–" Sky shrugged. "And they told me that I really, really can't get hit in the head again. Like ever again. Apparently, it could end pretty badly for me."
"So no more karate for you," said Sam.
"Nope. Looks like I won't be defending my trophy at the next All Valley."
Not that Sky had had any active plans on getting back to karate, but still - it was different to take a break from something than to be told that it was forbidden for life. It only made her realize how much she missed it, missed feeling strong and badass, like a fucking warrior Queen instead of this loser and a mess she had become.
"Oh, I'm so sorry," Moon spoke, her voice as sweet and soft as everything about her. Her hand was back on Sky's arm, giving a comforting squeeze.
"That sucks," said Sam. "You were so good at it. It's not fair you have to quit. Besides—"
"What?" Sky glanced at Sam. "It's not like you're doing karate at the moment either. Didn't your dad shut Miyagi-Do after the school fight?"
"He did. But I hate it. I just wish we could do something, I want us to have a chance to defend ourselves. I hate that Cobra Kai can still do what they want, that they can bully us all the time and just get away with it."
"Me too," Sky said, and she truly meant it. Rickenberger's mean words and laughter were still ringing in her ears making her feel hollow and broken. "But what do you want to do? As I said, I can't get into fights again—"
But she never got to finish that sentence, as Yasmine slammed her tray on the table and took a seat letting out a melodramatic sigh, flipping her blond locks behind her shoulder.
"Ewwww, guys, you won't believe what I just saw! It was so gross."
They all turned to look at Yas, who seemed to enjoy being the center of attention, as always.
"What happened?" asked Moon with a gentle frown.
"I just saw this guy being dragged out of school. Someone must have beat him up! I'm telling you, it was disgusting - there was blood all over his shirt, and his face was—" Yas shuddered at the memory and her nose scrunched up. "--well, I barely recognized him. As I said, disgusting."
Sky's stomach fell to the floor. She felt like she could be sick. The look on Hawk's face as he had walked out of the English classroom was all she could think about. The promise of violence in his eyes, like flames licking his irises from within.
"What guy?" She managed. "Who was it, Yas?"
"I don't know his name," Yas shrugged and picked up her fork. "That sleazy guy who can't keep his hands to himself. One of those douchebags who hang out with your boyfriend. Sorry, your ex-boyfriend."
"Doug?" Sky breathed. "Doug Rickenberger?"
"Maybe, who cares. I'm just glad they took him out of here. I almost got blood on my shoes, eww," Yasmine replied, but her attention was on the food that she had started to pick apart, clearly trying to avoid anything that didn't agree with her diet.
Sky stood up so fast she almost knocked over her chair. Hastily she picked up her backpack and threw it over one shoulder, forgetting all about her lunch.
"I'm sorry, I have to go—"
"Where? What's going on?" asked Sam, but Sky didn't stop to answer. She was already rushing away, out of the cafeteria as fast as her bad leg carried her.
The hallways were crowded, people were chatting and laughing, and as Sky passed groups of kids she heard an occasional snicker and someone called her slut, but this time she didn't even turn to look. Quickly she made her way into the nearest bathroom, walked into an empty stall, and pulled her phone from her pocket as she leaned her back against the locked door.
Rickenberger won't be bothering u again
She read that message again and let it sink in.
Hawk had beaten him up. Sky was sure of it. His beautiful, graceful hands that were so gentle, so soft when they touched her, had now drawn blood. He had done it for her, to stop the bullying the only way he knew how. And Sky knew she should've been pissed that he had done it despite her plea to 'let it go', she should've been furious at him for taking the justice into his own hands, she should've been shocked about the violence, she should've been disappointed because this wasn't an apology, this changed nothing, this was too little too late, but still—
The heartbeat in her chest was fast and heavy, and she took in a deep breath, then another. Tears filled her eyes, and she let them fall, she breathed in their salty taste. There was an ocean of sadness in her heart, an ocean of tears and a lifetime wouldn't be enough to let them all out, but for this shortest moment, she felt free.
She wrote two simple words, then hit the blue arrow before she had time to hesitate.
Thank you
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