Prof also learned that Goblins were the brains of the Greenskin species – again, a collection of different races. Ogres, on the other end of the spectrum, were the muscle, dumb, but extremely strong and durable brutes. They were somewhat pitied by the other races because they almost never became Redcaps, and with their pacifist and peaceful attitude they were almost useless for everything but heavy manual labor. Being cruel to an Ogre was an especially severe crime in Greenskin lands.

Hobgoblins and Orcs were somewhere in the middle. Both were stronger than Goblins and smarter than Ogres – Hobs were leaner, meaner, more cunning, and restless, while Orcs were bulkier, more peaceful, and laid back. These attributes were reflected in the disposition for "career path" too. Hobs tended towards more active careers, while Orcs to more scientific pursuits. Interestingly, the best magic wielders were Orcs, not Goblins, and the most famous and best musicians were Orcs too.

Interbreeding between the different races was possible and not looked down upon. However, there were no half-breeds, the child was always a pure-blood of the mother's race. Why it was so, Wolfgang had no idea and didn't care either.

Prof also learned that Gremlins weren't considered true Greenskins, they were something like livestock or renewable not-exactly-dumb ammunition. They were the ideal farm animals: they could take care of themselves, were able to accompany their masters into battle, and could be thrown at the enemies. A volley of screaming, half-meter-high "smart" ammunition was often enough to break even a shield wall.

From the stories of Shinead and (mostly) Foxy, Prof thought, that the Greenskins had only one country (or tribe, or horde, Shinead gave quite negative comments on Greenskins. But she did so with Humans too…), but it wasn’t so in reality. In fact, there were five larger and a few smaller states, not counting the enclaves in Human lands – although those were legally part of the respective Human state, they still could send representatives to the Greenskin… high council? Assembly? Meeting? Prof wasn’t clear on what that was, and since it was politics… well, he wasn’t particularly interested in the whole issue.

Wolfgang himself came from the largest, easternmost state, called Ostwaldland.

The Hags showed themselves only once in two days, distributing some raw meat and a bit of dirty water. Prof really hoped, he wouldn't get sick from the water – the meat he refused to eat, just like Bianca – dirty water wasn't the healthiest thing after all. However, not drinking wasn't an option, he was parched. A grown man could survive only for so long without water.

More problematic was, when they had to relieve themselves. The Hags didn't provide buckets, latrines, or at least some partition between the cages – which weren't overly large, to begin with.

Suffice to say, they all had unpleasant experiences.

Prof was disappointed that the experience did not give enough EXP for a Level Up. Probably they needed to escape the cages first…

When darkness fell on the third day, Prof started to get afraid, his friends abandoned him after all. The three prisoners haven't tried to escape on their own, simply because the cages looked too sturdy, and they were all naked, unarmed, and unarmoured. Even if they could open the cages somehow, they had no chance to face a Hag. Even when armed and armored, both Prof's party and Wolgang's band got their asses handed to them. Without any gear, fighting was hopeless. Even if they could get away unnoticed – that was unlikely too, as Bianca was the best sneak, with [Stealth] at 40% - they would have found themselves naked, unarmed, and unarmoured in the middle of the Valley. Going full caveman (to be polite: cavewoman, caveman, and caveorcmale), wasn't a recipe for long life expectancy out there.

So, they waited and hoped.

As it was in such kinds of situations, rescue arrived at the last second. Well, not exactly the last second, that would be when a Hag was just around the corner to collect Prof for a breeding session. It was at midnight when Prof woke up to someone poking him in the ribs. Just so you know, Kobold fingers aren't really made for poking, they have sharp and pointy claws.

“Missssster! Sssharpclaw here to resssscue! Will open cagessss! Be sssssilent. Evil ladiessss ssssleeping.”

Prof shouldn't have doubted his best friends on all of Arkadia! He should have been sure, they will come for him. He rubbed his ribs, hoping he wouldn't get an infection, Sharpclaw's claws were… sharp and they broke skin. How ironic would it be to escape being a breeding stallion, but to succumb to an infection! Bacilli were evil! Whole interstellar invasions fell to them!

“Is Mini with you?" Prof asked while Sharpclaw cut the vines holding his cage closed off.

“Misssusss with Big Lizzzzard. Big Lizzzzard ate lookout-lady. Waiting for misssster and ssssshieldlady.”

“Good, I was afraid, she was lost. Please free Wolfgang there too!”

“Green missster with ussss now?”

“Yeah, for the time being. We will need to help him find some stuff. Oh, and our stuff too.”

Losing his hard worked-for stuff wasn’t going to stand! If he had to, he would burn down the ruins, to get them back! Even if stone couldn’t burn, he would make it so!

After all three prisoners were out of their cages, Sharpclaw started to lead them through the ruins. Without the guide, Prof was certain, they would have gotten lost, or would have run into one of the Hags. The Kobold lead them through collapsed buildings, alleys full of debris and plants, bushes, and tree groups. They tried to be sneaky, but with everyone's low Skill, Prof was certain, an elephant in a china shop was less obvious. And quieter. Fortunately, the Hag on lookout duty was already eaten by Binky.

It took less than a quarter of an hour to be reunited with Mini.

“Oh, shit, Prof!” exclaimed the Vampire when she saw him

“Come on, Mini, it was only a few days, I’m sure, I’m not looking so bad!”

“No, I meant, eww, shit! You have excrement on your leg! Stay away!”

“Shit… The Hags will pay for this! They took my… I mean our stuff too! Can I wash somewhere?”

“There is a water hole over there, I don’t know, how much it will help, though… Oh, hello, handsome! Do you have a girlfriend?”

“No?”

“Do you want one? Prof’s just stringing me along!”

“Miss Mini! Mini!" Bianca desperately tried to get the Vampire's attention. She borrowed Sharpclaws's shirt, but it was too narrow on top and too short below. "Can you give me some underwear at least? I don't want the others to see me like this!"

“No problem, honey, but you should flash those parts more often. Nice rack!” There she went again. In the few minutes it took for Prof to more or less remove the filth from himself, Mini was already all over the poor Orc. Good. Prof was safe for the time being.

“Mini, do you have some clothes for us guys too? It’s windy down there.”

“Ah, spoilsport! Let’s see… These would fit you, sweetheart, for you, Prof, take these pants. Should more or less fit you. As for you, big guy, I don’t have anything. Oh, wait, you could wrap yourself up in this.”

Bianca was handed a… no way! She got a chain bikini, of all things! Unbelievable! Prof's "pants" were a pair of knee-length black Lederhosen, halters included, while Wolfgang had to wrap his waist in a colorful piece of textile. They looked ridiculous. What was this? Barbarian cosplay or a convention for tribal people from all over Arkadia?!?

“Miss Mini, these don’t cover much! I’m still almost naked! Can you give me some other clothes?”

“No. I'm not a costume rental. Bear with it till you get your own stuff back. Actually, it looks good on you and armored underwear is a very good thing to have. You can even keep it, I have another two."

“But my behind and breasts are still sticking out! Please!”

“No, they are not sticking out that much. Look at this piece. In this one, your ass and tits would hang out!" Mini waved another set of chain bikinis around. It was pink and skimpy. Who was making and buying these things, to begin with?! They were highly impractical! "You can choose, this pink one or the one you are wearing. You still have Sharpclaw's shirt, wear that."

Bianca grudgingly shut up and put the shirt back on, not even looking at the pink accessory.

With everyone having some textile on, Prof assessed the look. Well, at least they were upgraded from cave people to barbarians.

Or to people with an extremely bad taste in clothing…

Funnily, Mini was the best clothed and had the most clothes on. That was probably a first and a record.

Mini was able to supply everyone with some weaponry too – Prof started to get curious, about how bottomless her Backpacks and Saddlebags of Holding truly were.

However, Mini did not have any kind of axes, and Prof was proficient only in axes and daggers, so he was handed a long dagger of good quality and nicely engraved. If he remembered correctly, it was part of the Elve's stuff, they did not want to bring. Mini probably decided otherwise. Bianca got the blue steel shortsword, they liberated from the bywaymen all those months ago. Oh yeah, Mini was holding on to some of their earlier loot. Wolfgang was the easiest and the hardest – he had the most weapon Skills, but Mini still didn't have any kind of axes, was freshly out of good swords and daggers, and the only instrument for making people dead she had and could be used by Wolfgang was an evil looking mace. It was made out of some kind of bone – strangely not white but black – with one end carved to look like a skull.

Nothing could stand in their way to plunder their loot back! Nothing, but a dozen higher Leveled Brook Hags, but that was beside the point, and they were probably sleeping too. It was time for sneaking around, stabbing evil, kidnapping, man-eating Hags in the back, and looting their brains out! Onwards! For loot! And for clothes that deserved the name.

The Barbarian Cosplay Convention was ready to roll!