Authors note: Is my upload schedule pissing anyone off? Because last I checked it's pretty much all over the place. I do it when I remember so sorry for being super fucking annoying. at least you get to read this chapter whenever you want.

Max slipped on his hoodie and looked in the mirror as David tried to comb his hair.

"David, you've lost three combs already, just give up." Max said annoyed. David was really persistent about making Max looked good for his first day at his new school. He wanted Max to make lots of new friends, mostly so he wouldn't have to deal with Nikki peeing on the carpet all the time.

"I almost have it!" David said as he aggressively ran the comb through his hair. He smiled when he finally managed to get a tiny bit done. Max's hair suddenly came alive and returned to its original position almost growling as it moved making David's face turn white.

"Can I go now?" Max asked.

"uhh....I guess so." David said as he looked at Max's hair with fear.

"Thank god." Max said as he stormed down the stairs into the main area of the blockbuster store. David followed after him with a smile on his face.

"Have a good day at school son!" David said happily as Max stormed out of the front doors to the nearby bus stop.

"Fuck off David." Max shouted back.

"That means he loves me!" David said with starry eyes.

"It does?" Gwen asked confused.

"I can't wait for him to come home and tell me all about his first day of school!"

***

David stared at the burning building with shock on his face. A ton of children were running around screaming as firefighters tried to fight the blaze.

"I'm gonna be honest....." Max said as he scratched his head. "I didn't really see that coming until at least the end of the week." He shrugged as he looked at the blaze. "At least you can read all about my first day from the police report."

"Lab....lab safety.....lab.....lab safety." Max's science teacher muttered to himself nearby. He was rocking back and forth with most of his hair singed off.

"I blame Neil." Max said as several police officers walked up.

"Hey, don't put this on me, I just said you could create nitroglycerin with....."

"How was I supposed to know nitroglycerin did that?!" Max snapped over him.

"If you would have let me finish then I could have told you!" Neil snapped back.

"Imma be honest, It was probably our fault." Nikki said.

"Where not even sure where the fire started." The cop said as he shook his head. "It sounds like nearly everyone here accidently caused it."

"Hey, I only set the bathroom on fire like....twice." Nerf said.

"If you can't do an ollie over a gas pipe, then it's totally not up to code." Erid defended herself.

"Those theater curtains were far too flammable, how am I supposed to make proper explosion effects, if everything burns down after every performance!" Preston said annoyed.

"I needed the bolts from the gas pipe for mein sculpture!" Dolph said as he gestured toward a thing made of clay that looked alot like hitler, if a bit deformed.

"I thought it was flash paper." Harrison said.

"Your an idiot Harrison!" Nerris said. "At least I set that brazier on fire on purpose.....how was I supposed to know it was fake......"

"And I was there too!" Space kid said excitedly as he jumped to gain the cops attention. The cop merely rubbed his temples as he took stock of the disaster.

"Well at least no one was hurt...." David said as he tried to see the bright side. "....permanently." he finished as he remembered the teachers in the ambulance.

The cop shook his head and finished his report as he walked away with a shake of his head.

***

Max looked out over the blockbuster as he sat on the stool they kept behind the counter. The other campers were all standing in the blockbuster with their parents. David was currently talking with the parents as they figured out what to do in terms of school for the rest of the year.

The school district decided not to put this incident on the campers permanent record because of all the safety violations, but they couldn't have such disaster prone students in there halls. They decided to do something called a soft expulsion for all the kids involved in the accident. It basically means they have the choice of either signing up for a different school district, or having their kids take all the classes at home in there homeschooling program. It wasn't meant as a punishment, just a way of encouraging them to find an alternate, less flammable, route for there education.

"I can't drive all the way to the city every day." Carl said as he referred to one of the options set out for them. "I have classes I'm supposed to teach."

"We have work as well." Agent Miller said. "We wouldn't have time for homeschooling either."

"Well, the FBI that busy...." Carl said. Agent Miller suddenly grabbed him and shoved a gun in his throat.

"How do you know we work for the FBI?!" Agent Miller yelled in his face as he held the gun in his mouth.

"You arrested Campbell infront of us....please don't kill me?!" Carl choked out.

"Oh right." Agent Miller said as he let him go.

"Well it says here that you can pay a tutor to teach your children if they have a liberal arts degree." Max said as he spied the caveat and grinned evilly.

"Who would have a liberal arts degree?" Carl asked as he stood up and rubbed his back.

"I know someone....." Max smiled evilly as he looked over at Gwen.

"Oh no...." Gwen said as she put her hands up. "Don't do it...."

"Gwen has a liberal arts degree!" Max said suddenly shouted as he pointed at her, everyone looked at her suddenly with hope in their eyes.

"No fucking way!" Gwen said suddenly. "If you think I'm gonna get you people out this mess then you are so wrong! Your little brats are not my problem!" Everyone in the room suddenly pulled out there wallets and shoved large wads of money in her face.

"Nevermind, I'm totally into this now." She said as she grabbed a giant stack of cash from the nearest hand.

"This is gonna be fun!" Max said as he smiled evilly. Nikki laughed alongside him and Neil grabbed a test tube from pants filled with a strange liquid.

***

The campers filed into the movie theater and took their individual seats around the room.

The blockbusters movie theater was small, and the tv barely worked, but at least it made a good makeshift classroom. The individual movie seats now had small tables in front of them, and the front of the room had a desk David managed to dig out of the blockbuster storage room. He also found a chalkboard that was currently sitting next to the desk.

Max took his seat at the back with Nikki and Neil. This was gonna be fun, he made teachers miserable for years, now he was getting a chance to mess with Gwen. He suddenly looked on in confusion as David walked into the room.

"So, uhh...." David said as he swallowed a little. "Gwen needs a minute to....cry, so I'll be starting the lesson today!"

"Huh." Max said as he smiled evilly. If David and Gwen where going to tag team this, that made everything even better. He suddenly stood up at his table with an evil smirk.

"Yes Max?" David asked.

"Ready....." Max said to the rest of the room. "Aim...."

"Oh no." David said as he realized what Max was holding.

"Fire!" Max said as he brought the straw up to his mouth. A hail of spitballs erupted from all the campers covering David from head to toe.

"Well.....well I think it's wonderful that you all took the time to work together to make this possible!" David said as he tried to put a positive spin on being covered in human saliva.

Gwen walked into the room with puffy eyes and a frown on her face. She took one look at the students before taking a massive huff out of a paper bag full of money she put together. She then put on a fake smile and walked over to the shitty chalkboard David found in his storage room.

"Good morning camp....er students." Gwen decided. "Today we'll be learning....." She checked the home schooling crap the school district sent.

"Sex ed....." Gwen said as she read the table. She stopped when she heard Max giggle in the back of the room.

"Oh, it is go time you little bastard!" Gwen shouted up at Max. "David, leave the room!"

"I don't think you should be....."

"I said leave the fucking room David!" Gwen shouted in his face.

"Okay....." David said as he slunk out of the room and closed the door behind him. Gwen got her own evil smile as she yanked out a dvd shed been saving for a while now.

"Who wants to watch...." Gwen shoved it into a dvd player for the big screen. "....the miracle of life...."

***

The door to the blockbuster theater burst open as the campers came crawling out. Space kid was the first to come out and his face was completely green. He took one look at one of the movies with a woman sitting on a car and threw up in his helmet before stumbling into a dvd rack and falling over.

"Well that's one way to turn someone gay." Max said nonchalantly as he walked out. The smell of vomit was getting to be a bit much.

"What did I do to my poor mom?!" Nerf said as he came out with his arms wrapped around his stomach. He shook violently as the idea wouldn't leave his head.

"What's the matter kids?" Gwen came out with a psychotic smile. "Were only a quarter of the way through. You haven't even seen the part about the c section!"

"We get it, your a bitch, chill out already." Max snapped.

"I thought it was neat!" Nikki said with a smile, everyone went bug eyed as they looked at Nikki and decided not to open that can of worms. Coincidentally she was eating out of a can of worms as everyone stared at her.

***

Max walked into the theater with an evil smile on his face. Gwen eyed him up suspiciously as he set down an apple on the front desk.

"Enjoy." Max said evilly as he walked up to his desk. Gwen gave him the side eye and decided not to touch that apple in any way.

"I wanna go home." Preston said as he rocked back and forth in his chair.

"Shut up Preston, the videos over now." Max snapped at him. He sat at his desk and gave Gwen an evil smirk as she took another step away from the apple on her desk.

"Okay, now where going over basic geometry." Gwen said as she looked down at one of the text books. She turned to the chalk board and started to write something down, but stopped when a paper football hit her head.

"Max, if you do that again, I swear to god I will make you sit through the whole video all over again!" Gwen shouted as she snapped at the class.

"That was Nikki." Max said as he doodled a demon in his notebook. Nikki smiled deviously as she pulled out another paper football and prepared to fire. Gwen quietly fumed as another paper football and hit her face.

"That's it!" Gwen said as she marched straight out of the room, grabbed David by the collar and dragged him back inside. "Teach, I'm on break!"

"Uhh....okay." David said as he looked at the teachers desk. "Oh look and apple!"

"Dont!" Gwen said as she grabbed the apple and threw it in the trash.

"Well I think it's very rude of you to take the apple I had Max give you, and throw it in the trash." Max sniggered as David pointed out where he got it. The best way to screw with someone you hate, is to be uncharacteristically nice to them. Then watch them totally flip out in suspicion and fear. That and stick a razor in an apple.

"Just teach the class for five minutes!" Gwen snapped at him. "I need more midol." she said as she walked out of the room rubbing her temples.

"Well....that happened a lot later than I thought it would!" David said. "Gwen must be getting into the teaching spirit!" David said as he spun it into a happy thought.

"Can we cool off and maybe listen to David for a few minutes?" Neil asked hesitantly. The whole class turned and looked at him all at once. "It's uh....it's just a suggestion." Neil said as he looked at Nurf rubbing his fists.

Neil is a nerd, so he actually kinda likes school. He does kinda like that he gets to be in the same class as all his friends but, there antics are kinda ruining school for him. He's just lucky that the school district agreed not to put his expulsion in his permanent record.

"Nerd!" Nikki yelled as she stood on her table.

"Nikki, get down from there!" David yelled as he tried to sound authoritative. Nikki grumbled as she went back into her seat.

"Okay kids, lets learn about....vectors!" David said as he read from the textbook.

***

David wrote on the chalkboard as he described a long complicated equation. His watch suddenly went off and he smiled as he finished out the equation.

"It's time for after school clubs!" David said happily. "Oh, and finish equation seven."

"Clubs?" Neil asked.

"Space club!" Space kid shouted as he stood on his desk.

"Yuppers." David said. "Since I was in charge of all your camp activities, your parents agreed to pay me, to run your after school clubs like we were back at camp!"

"Yeah, uhuh." Max said as he counted a wad of cash he stole from David. He turned to walk out of the room and nearly made it into the store when david grabbed his hoodie and brought him back into the room.

"Ah ah, you too Max." David said.

"What?" Max asked incredulously.

"Since you seemed to enjoy camp so much, I had you signed up for every activity!" David smiled happily.

"I spent the whole time trying to burn the camp down David!" Max snapped at him.

"And you had a lot of fun doing it!" David said as he did a little twirl. "It'll be like where right back at camp all over again!"

"Son of a bitch." Max grumbled.

"Alright kids, let's start with.....Dolph's camp....er, club." David said.

"I will be the best drawer in all of mein reich!" Dolph said happily.

***

Dolph happily drew on the paper as the rest of the classroom mostly just doodled random crap in there notebooks.

"And remember kids, the best way to draw, isn't to move your wrist." David said. "Now why don't we learn about the color spectrum?"

"I ran out of paint." Dolph said suddenly.

"Oh, well I'll go get some more." David walked over to the paint station and accidentally spilled some on his shirt.

"Oh David, perhaps you should take a shower." Dolph said as he tried to sound helpful. David suddenly realized Dolph had a spot of black paint right under his nose. He quickly grabbed a napkin and began to wipe his face as he set down the paint on his table.

"I think that's enough for today." David said as he stood up sweating slightly.

"Hey David." Max said, making David turn to him. He suddenly kicked a lever on a large catapult and suddenly a massive glob of paint smacked David down to the ground. "Now, he needs a shower."

***

David walked out of the door to the blockbuster theater covered head to toe in red, white, and black paint. At least he managed to get most of the paint out of his eyes. Now he could at least see through one of his eyes....a little.

"I got the store." Gwen said as she sat back down on the stool behind the counter.

"Thank you." David said as he climbed the stairs into the storage room.

The campers came out covered in paint. Preston covered half his face in white paint like the phantom of the opera. Neil was currently grumbling as Nerf wrote profanitys on his back. Max was mostly untouched besides the occasional bits and pieces of paint.

Erid....was just too cool to be covered in paint. Seriously, Max spent the last five minutes trying to get paint on Erid, but for some magical reason it just rolled right off her like she was magic.

Nikki was completely covered in red paint from head to toe, and pretending to be a cannibal. She kept trying to eat space kid, but she never got through his helmet.

Nerris and Preston where in the middle of a fight to the death, but they only had paint on hand so it wasn't really going anywhere.

"That actually wasn't fucking awful." Max said with an evil smirk. "Can't wait for tomorrow."

***

Max walked up to the storage room as David was drying his hair. David gave him a smile as he put on his vest.

"I'm so glad that you actually had fun today Max!" David said happily.

"I spent the whole day torturing you and Gwen." Max pointed out. "And I burned down a school."

"Well....at least you applied yourself."

"So I guess the moral of the story is, burn down your school and good things happen." Max said.

"Well....no, that's not right." David said. "That's not a good moral at all!"

"David, no one cares." Max said as he walked over to his shelf bed.

"Hold on there, I wanted to talk to you before you went to bed!" David said.

"What?" Max asked.

"I found this in your notebook!" David said as he pulled out a piece of paper he ripped out of Max's notebook. It was a small doodle of the camp from the ledge they went camping on.

"So?" Max asked. "It's just a stupid doodle."

"I thought it belonged on the fridge!" David said happily.

"Why would you care about something so stupid?" Max asked. "It's just a stupid drawing."

"It's because you made it Max!" David said with a smile. "And I think you did a very good job on it too!"

"So?" Max asked. "Why would you care?"

"Because you did a good job on it!" David declared. "I think you deserve to be congratulated on that!"

"But....but why do you care?" Max asked. He couldn't really understand. It was just a stupid picture, sure it looked sort of okay, but it wasn't worth anything to anyone.

"I want you to sign it, so I can hang on the fridge!" David beamed.

"I...okay." Max said as he took the picture. He couldn't understand why David would actually care so much. He wondered if this was how parents were supposed to act when there child made something. The last thing he ever made for his real parents, they used to snort cocaine.

Max signed it and waved him off before lying down on his bunk and playing on his phone. He didn't know why, but the fact that David cared about something so small, made him feel almost happy. He cursed himself as he buried himself under his blanket.

***

David smiled happily as he read over the adoption paperwork he picked up from a nearby agency. He was already Maxs official guardian in foster care, but he wanted to make it official so Max could not be taken away from him for any reason.

Max suddenly sat up from his bunk as he checked the time on his phone, and David suddenly scrambled to hide the papers.

"Oh, hi Max, I didn't realize you were awake!" David said.