The Systemless Squad begins its battle to retake the state of California. To free it from the clutches of the United States and begin the counterattack against their multiversal invasion.

The three main prongs of our attack center around the three most important cities in the region: Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Santa Barbara.

The latter one is where I, as King Solbourne, am taking part personally.

With my finest elite surfers on our boards speeding towards the city, this is our ultimate hour.

Strapped to each of our backs is one beaver in the Beaver Hopper Clan. They are expert monster hunters, and will help us brave the challenges to come.

The MS Zaandam stays behind, firing off all its cannons and missiles at strategic locations throughout the city. Since we were the ones who built this city, built it on rock and roll, I’m told, we know exactly how to take it down. Did we just lose the beat? No. They call us irresponsible, but our attacks on our own city are done with care. The anti-aircraft cannons are taken down. The barracks are decimated. And the defensive positions aimed right at the landing beach? Let’s just say their guitars our getting our wrecking balls blasted right into them.

Knee deep in the hoopla, my contingent fires off bows and arrows at any foot soldiers on the ground. There’s a bunch of skeletons on the beach, and they go down like chumps. That’s what they deserve for betraying the people of Mystix.

I left my most treasured bow and arrow set back in Mutsu. I’m honestly sure I won’t need it. My confidence is just that high.

Instead, I take out from my inventory my newest weapon I’m testing out—

And AK-47 automatic rifle!

I light up that beach like it’s no tomorrow. Enemy soldiers, skeleton or human or anything in between, fall to the amazing magical attack.

Those who stay standing, I dispatch with a quick [Overload Spark] attack.

Overload Spark: Rank 5. Deal electric damage to each selected target within one mile. Cost: 888 LP.

The beach is clear. We make our landing and leave our surfboards where they are. We untie the beavers and let them to their own devices. They’re about to deal with the biggest issue of this battle...

“RRRRRROOOOOOAAAAAAR.”

The Skeleton Maw Dragon wakes up and leaves its perch. It soars through the air, howling its bony cry.

It’s headed right for us...

But the Beaver Hopper Clan is far too crafty for that. They’re already prepared for hunting season. One of them shoots a flare up into the sky, and when it falls it explodes with bright flashing colors in another part of the city. The Skeleton Maw Dragon immediately falls in the flare’s direction and attacks it ravenously. That buys us some well-needed time.

“Attack!” I yell. “Press onwards, all!”

We climb up the beach and enter the city streets. There are no civilians, fortunately. They either evacuated or were already imprisoned by the brutal regime. That means we can go all out.

Some soldiers rush at us, firing off their guns, but I poof my special Balloon Sword out of my inventory and slash into the air—all the enemy bullets float to the ground, harmlessly. The soldiers are so confused that we are able to take them out without any real effort.

One soldier pulls out his radio and calls for backup, screaming about the enemy forces approaching rapidly. But nothing seems to work with the radio. It pulses out loud screeches, then sparks, and then steam rises up as if the device simply exploded.

We dispatch him and continue.

Any attacking soldiers that come at us, I nullify with the Balloon Sword attack and then take out with my AK-47. Dual-wielding these two weapons is not quite as impressive or meaningful as two well-adjusted bows, but it gets the job done very well.

There are tanks in the streets, motionless and eerie. TV screens on shop windows display nothing but swooshing static.

Some soldiers are outright hiding behind vehicles, I can see. We don’t bother with those.

I will soon learn that this strangeness is not an isolated event. Every city in all of California is undergoing the same phenomenon. Electronics that have some sort of access to online computing, and anything that can connect to those electronics, are malfunctioning at a rapid pace. The military’s mobile suit division is crippled. Their communications are down. And anything they commandeer from civilians is dead as well.

Whatever caused this, it isn’t affecting us and our Japanese-developed equipment.

I’m quite confused about all of it. But I’m no expert mastermind on this sort of thing. I accept the blessing and move on for now. Anything to take back California faster.

We reach the primary base, built on top of what used to be my palace.

And there, the Mystix Lord of Santa Barbara is caught completely off-guard by our arrival. An orc [Supreme] dressed in fancy robes, built well with many muscles. They are the commander of this military force occupying Santa Barbara, rather than a hardened U.S. soldier.

The Skeleton Maw Dragon is currently engaged in fierce battle with the beavers on the other side of the city. This [Supreme] has no backup whatsoever. They keep an arrogant posture, however.

“Yet still it lives,” the orc says. “King Solbourne back to reclaim the ruins of his throne.”

“We’re here for much more than that,” I say. “Stand down. Surrender to us and I will show you great mercy, despite your betrayal.”

They remove their robes, revealing tight-fitting battle armor. A powerful aura emenates from their being. “I was an Anti-Mage once,” the [Supreme] says. “I followed your sibling Rare to the ends of Mystix. Held firm when they turned against the New Slayers, fought valiantly against Mestopholees and her terrors. Then I found out that they summoned the U.S. to their side. I followed them then, allowed our new allies to defeat our enemy. Then, suddenly, Rare turned against them as well. And that’s when I realized it.”

There’s a pause. “Realized what?”

“Solbournes are trash.” The Mystix Lord shoots a [Psybeam] in my direction and I narrowly dodge. One of the other surfers is hit and instantly evaporates. I would have withstood that attack, to some extent, but it would have caused a great dizzying confusion in me, I’m sure of it.

The battle is on. I shoo the other surfers away and allow this to become a one-on-one affair.

And now the real contest can begin.

I zap over to this villain and punch them in the stomach. It is true that I may be considered trash by many. But I am trash that can thrash and bash as well. “Shall we dance?”

Before they have time to react and counterattack, I activate [Searing Rush] and the battle is just about over.

Searing Rush: Rank 3. Triples speed and agility for 3 minutes. Cost: 1115 LP.

I’m so fast they can’t keep up.

My attacks are so swift, so undodgeable, that they have to unleash every Destiny Card in their hand just to keep up.

I’m hit by a stray [Lightning Bolt] and knocked to the ground. But now I know something important. They don’t have any [Counterspell] type cards on them, or they would have used it already.

I activate [Instant Death] and obliterate them from existence.

Instant Death: Rank 8. Kill target. Cost: 4444 LP.

There we go. Battle over.

And would you look at that... Here in their possession, dropped from inventory on death, is none other than a Sorting Scepter.

The Skeleton Maw Dragon goes down. Those beavers truly are expert monster hunters, if they were able to fell such a mighty beast.

And I start to hear reports about other successes all over the state. San Francisco is secure. Los Angeles is freed. San Diego’s forces are overthrown, and Sacramento had been left completely unguarded due to low strategic or cultural value.

Within the day, California is ours. We are victorious.