We fumbled for another topic afterward, both of us wordlessly agreeing, as if telepathically, not to continue the dating vein. I reminded Eclairs that I had drunk poison before as an experiment. That got her to laugh, signaling our conversation stabilized. I offhandedly wondered if I could sell the poison bottles I made with my Masterwork Ocadule to the new players. Eclairs had told me that poisons were in demand, but I realized she was lying that time not to make me feel bad.

“I’m not… I’m not sure if new players will buy those,” she said, looking at the ground. Her steps were hesitant. “Like they’ll want stuff that’ll help kill monsters faster. Poisons are, um, kinda slow in the farming department.”

“I see what you mean. Poisons deal Damage over Time of percentage health, but players want to take out targets in one hit for optimum farming.”

“Yep, they’ll go for something that increases their base damage outright instead of waiting for monsters to die to DoTs.”

“What are poisons good for?” I asked, sprinkling dejectedness in my voice. “I know they don’t work well against bosses and mini-bosses because those guys have inherent resistances to statuses, more so against poison. If not boss-hunting or farming, then what?”

“Um… um…” Eclairs continued to look at the ground. I bowed to peer at her face. Her eyes darted around. Then she noticed me looking at her. “I know!” she exclaimed. “Quest bosses! Most of them don’t have poison resistance. If a player is having a hard time against a quest boss—maybe she’s under-leveled or lacks DPS and can’t get help—she can cheese the boss with poison.”

“Poison cheese? I know that blue cheese is poisonous to dogs.”

“That’s not what—blue cheese? Really? Are you messing with me?”

“I’m not going to mess with an evil prim and proper lady,” I said with a wink.

“Good. Because I can mess you right back.” She squinted and pursed her lips, shaking a fist at me. With her grey eyes not that visible, her cuteness took over, especially with her pretend-angry face.

“Very scary.” I raised my hands in surrender.

“Damn right, I’m scary.” She grinned to show she was joking.

“Thanks for the tip about quest bosses, scary Eclairs.” That was probably enough for that bit. I couldn’t milk our banter without seeming to be hitting on her. I’d engage a couple of lines and pull back to talking about MCO. This was too early for anything.

I had already thought of her tip on poisoning quest bosses. When killing Moa Manot, the Blighted Vinereaver, I used poison to counteract its massive healing and regeneration while the rest of my party brought it down. But instead of opening a store selling a niche product for a limited customer pool, I just gave poison bottles to new players—it was buying reputation.

“Poisons are also good against tanks in PvP,” Eclairs said. “But I don’t think much PvP is going on in the mountains, is there? The PvP scene will grow as more players come, so you can wait for that.”

My side done, I shifted to asking Eclair about her character. I had to consciously remind myself after every concluded ‘segment’ to switch to her side of the fence. I tended to be self-centered—the understatement of the century—add that I get sucked into my head when theorycrafting about builds in RPGs.

As Eclairs animatedly chatted about cooking food buffs and guild affairs, ranting that ingredients on the market were still in low supply and real life was getting in the way of her in-game duties, I chuckled and made sounds of agreement at appropriate times. I itched to ask for tips about stacking debuffs with food, but I held myself back. I was Herald Stone, the Great Listener.

“The plus side of specializing in cooking,” Eclairs said, “is eating delicious food I make in-game that I have no hopes of cooking in real life. Kinda silly to be proud of that, but I really am. The AU-VR helm probably pokes the parts of the brain that reacts to delicious food or something.”

“That’s the dream,” I said. “Binging whole cakes and not gaining weight or increasing sugar levels.” That reminded me, I was due for a check-up at the hospital to see if everything was going fine.

“Eh? You can’t just eat whatever you want. You’ll get an upset stomach if you do that.”

“I ate a piece of stale bread before and got that negative status,” I said, reminiscing about my short time as a human in Amberkeld town.

A baker NPC gave me unsold bread a few days old. It healed me when consumed but also inflicted a negligible DoT. That experience inspired me to order intentionally wrongly cooked food from Clement to stack debuffs for [Cleansing Flames].

“There are several ways to get an upset stomach,” Eclairs said. “The effects depend on what you do, like eating too many sweets can lead to sluggishness—slow movement and attack speed. It’ll get worse the more you stuff your face until the system no longer allows you to eat.”

“What’s the easiest way to get the most harmless upset stomach?”

“Is this connected with your poison-drinking thing? Are you going to do something fucking insane—oh my gosh.” She covered her mouth in a gasp. “I’m so sorry, I can’t just help myself.”

I waved it off. “I told you that I don’t mind. I’ll keep your prim and proper image in my head if that’s what you want.”

“Please, and thank you.” She stopped to curtsy again. “Really weird that I can’t put a lid on cursing when I’m with you. I try to; I really do. I usually talk like that only when I’m with friends.”

“Does that mean I’m your enemy?”

“No, silly. I guess… you’re my friend?”

“Is that a question?”

“You’re my friend.” Eclairs gave me a sidelong glance.

“It’s an honor, prim and proper, but secretly evil, Eclairs.”

“Whatever,” she drawled, rattling the ‘r’ long as if purring. “Back to your question. If you eat something sweet like candy three times in a row, you’ll get a mild upset stomach that reduces attack speed. You don’t care about that since you’re a tank, right?”

“Attack speed? Not at all. I’m not a lifesteal tank. Thanks for another tip.”

We rounded the last corner of the block and strolled down Falconet Street to return to the convenience store. For the final leg of our journey, we didn’t talk. It didn’t feel awkward, at least for me. Eclairs hummed the tune of a popular song, so it didn’t seem it was for her either.

Peaceful and relaxing, though the street was getting busy and noisier as the sun traveled higher in the sky. Eclairs and I were a quarter of a meter apart. I made sure to walk in a straight line. She was slightly zigzagging as if dancing to her humming. A few times, our arms bumped. She didn’t react, so neither did I.

As we neared the convenience store, Eclairs slowed her pace. I matched hers. What parting words should I give? Inviting her for lunch cropped up, but I quickly shot it down for being premature. Maybe I could do that during MotherCon if I’d meet her there.

Before I could settle on my words, Eclairs stepped before me. “Thanks for accompanying me on my break, Mr. Lucky Charm Customer Herald Stone.”

It wasn’t her actual break time, but I didn’t point it out. “Is that what you’re calling me now? Sounds like the titles of royals.”

“Herald…” She leaned forward, tilting her head up at me. I clenched my jaws to stop myself from visibly reacting to her eyes, which were like portals to the world beyond. Her face was completely serious. “You’re good at controlling the conversation.”

“What?” I said, wrinkling my forehead. “Controlling?”

“You didn’t think I’ll notice? Talking about yourself, then about me. Just the right amount of back and forth. Very different when I talk to other guys—I mean, how considerate of you. And you were aware not to step on any lines.”

“What lines would that be?”

“You don’t need me to tell you that.”

“Well, I don’t know if I completely understand what you’re talking about, but I take care not to step on anything I'm not supposed to.”

Eclairs collapsed her severe expression into giggling. “You can toe lines sometimes, you know?”

“What do you—?”

“I’m sorry,” Eclairs interjected, fishing her phone out of her pocket. “Krisha messaged me that she needs instructions about something,” she said, glancing at her phone’s screen too fast to read. She waved goodbye as she jogged back to the convenience store.

“Bye…” I replied, staring at her back through the glass before she disappeared into the shelves.

I ducked my head as I entered the company car. The door automatically glided shut with a subtle hiss after I settled my ass on the expensive leather. A press of a button turned the tinted window fully clear. On the other side was my family’s old house. Not so old anymore, after the extensive renovations.

Our quaint flat bungalow had another floor added to it, topped with a pitched roof for an attic space. The second floor and attic were in the original plans of the structure, but my newlywed parents couldn’t afford it three decades ago, scaling back their dream house by more than half. Pops could no longer see this, but I was sure Mum would be beside herself in delight.

The exterior works were done, other than the landscaping. Men in grey overalls transported plants into freshly dug holes. They covered islands of concrete with pebbles to tone down the harshness. Two were testing the fountain—Sawyer’s request to add to the nature vibes. The rest of the workers were inside, putting the finishing touches.

They’d be done by this weekend. At long last, I could scratch Goal #101 off The List. I’d be left with Goal #170, that’d take a long time to finish, and Goal #133, opening Dolly’s branches in the Egret—a comeback of success in the city we once left because of poverty. Our two branches were opening soon.

I needed more Goals!

Several possibilities were in Mother Core Online, but I’d rather have an MCO List separate from The List. I should stock up on MCO Goals to occupy me. Currently, I only have killing Buvalu solo on my plate.

I nodded at the working men before turning up the window’s tint.

“Shall we go to the main office, sir?” asked Jimmy from the driver’s seat. He had a holo-map of the city in front of him, waiting for my instructions to pinpoint our destination.

“Please, Jimmy. And don’t rush. I’m going to get some work done on the way.” I tapped my WeeCee to check my MCO character info.