Sitting around our short little table, the mademoiselle's holy undergarments watching over us, Lemmy had begun explaining exactly why my investigation isn't a good idea. As we sat there listening to him carefully, Kevin cleaned up his bloody mouth and sat down together with us.

"Right, now can I talk?" Lemmy rolled his Eyes.

"Hey, it was your fault for chipping my tooth." Kevin scoffed back, "Just be glad we're not reporting you to anyone and speak."

"Sigh, whatever." He then began, "In short, what you're trying to uncover is a phenomenon. Just like how Entropa has occasional tornadoes, and how Cardina has frequent rain, Simpleton has the Glitch. I know it's not an answer you wanna hear right now, but I'd suggest you give up and focus on your studies."

"Big words coming from someone so small." I shot back, "I would be inclined to agree with you, however it has happened to me three times now just in this one week. I am definitely being targeted for whatever reason."

"Or you're just unlucky as shit." He glared back, "The chances are small, but that doesn't mean you're safe after having it happen once. Think of it like getting struck by lighting."

"Are you really content with letting this go on?" I asked.

Giving a brief pause before answering my question, Lemmy sighed, "Of course not. I myself spent countless nights wracking my brain as to how to solve it. After all, I don't want Archambeau to continue living in such an environment. It's basically digital robbery."

"And why her exactly?" Kevin hissed, "Listen kid, I'm the one gunning for Kiria, so stay out of my turf."

"Phah! Turf?" Lemmy loudly guffawed, "No one likes a guy that objectifies women, jackass. In fact, that only shows how primitive you are. She's single, I know because I asked personally."

"Wait, so you asked her that but did not follow it up with asking her out?" I tilted my head.

"Are you crazy? The mood wasn't right at all." He shook his head, "If I did that, I'd only be setting myself up for failure."

"Right, I totally get that." Kevin found common ground, "I actually liked her since we were just little kids. Though I wanted to confess even back then, I knew all too well that she would just brush me off and I'd forever be stuck in the friendzone."

"Right?" Lemmy smiled, "You get me! Damn, I didn't think you had some common sense in you."

"I'm always serious when it comes to Kiara!" Kevin loudly professed, "Alright kid, we both seem to cherish her very much. How about this - no hard feelings, no matter who she ends up choosing."

"Yeah, I can agree to those terms." Lemmy stuck his hand out, "You seem like a swell enough guy."

Exchanging a handshake that even the heavens almost shined upon, the two gentlemen's duel for the fair mademoiselle had officially begun. Though, I do not really care for that. More importantly, we seem to have strayed from the topic I was originally promised.

"So, is that all you know regarding the Glitch?" I then interjected, "That is not adequate enough information. I am going to get your father."

"O-Oi! Sit the fuck down!" He begged, "Fine, you want more info?! Here, take this!"

"The hell are those keys for?" Kevin asked.

"Don't tell anyone I gave you these. And return them by tomorrow morning. I'll come to your dorm to retrieve them." He explained, "They're the keys to the student council storeroom. Inside, you'll find out everything you need regarding the Glitch."

"This... seems too good to be true." I ascertained, "What is the catch here?"

"Catch? There's no catch." He shook his head, "Although, I guess the only catch is that you mustn't get caught, otherwise all three of us get expelled. Try to avoid that, and sneak back into your dorms before dawn. That is all."

"Hmph, another lead!" Kevin acted like a detective, "Shall we go, assistant?"

"Why am I the assistant? Am I not the head detective of this case?" I asked.

"No, that's me, remember?" He reminded me, "Don't forget, Kiria likes the cool detective type, so I gotta act like that in order to win her over."

"I think that ship has sailed." I furrowed my brows.

"Just get going, geez!" Lemmy forced us out of the dorm, "Remember, in and out! A-And don't get caught!"

***

Well, I guess we've got our next lead. For whatever reason, the phrase "Let's split up and look for clues, gang!" comes to mind, however the gang in question is literally just me and Kevin. That being said, we had somehow acquired the keys to the student council storeroom, and we were tasked with finding out as much as we could just during this one night. Thankfully, it was already pretty late into the evening, so no one was in the University building anyways. Maybe you could find one or two of the staff there, thought that shouldn't be too difficult to hide from.

"Man, I wonder what the tyke is talking about. Kind of gets you excited, doesn't it?" Kevin nudged.

"Not the time, Kevin. For now we should remain vigilant, and above all else quiet." I shushed him, "According to my info, the storeroom should be a single shed just out back of the main building. We should hurry it up so we have as much time to search as possible."

As I said this, we had hastened our gaits before making it to the shed in question in record time. Taking out my keys and putting them inside the door, I heard a loud tumble just inside.

"What was that?" Kevin jumped back.

"Must be a cat or something. Calm down." I gave him a disappointed side-eye before clicking open the door, "Huh?"

"O-Oh! Hello guys! F-F-F-Fancy m-meeting you here!" Mademoiselle popped out of the dark room, "Y-You shouldn't be here this late. W-Where did you get the keys?"

"That Lemmy lent them to us." Kevin explained, "But never mind that! Did you get locked in here all by yourself!?"

"Huh?" She tilted her head before agreeing, "A-Ah! Y-Yep, totally! I got locked in here on accident! Geez, what a klutz I am, right?"

"Hm..." I inspected her a bit more closely, "And why are you so sweaty? And your clothes are disheveled. What's really going on here?"

"T-That's...!" She was on the verge of tears.

"Hey now, what the hell kind of questions are you asking a lady in distress?" Kevin stopped me, "She was obviously desperately trying to find a way out, and in doing so she got a bit sweaty is all. Seriously Meil, you have no tact."

"Phew. Y-Yeah, exactly that." She smiled at Kevin, "Thanks for helping me explain."

As she went to give him a hug, Kevin was just about ready to rise to the heavens above. His expression contorted over time gradually, going from abject confusion, over to surprise, then sheer happiness alone as he returned the hug in full, even going so far as to rock her a bit as if he couldn't contain his excitement. Though there was something that even he couldn't help but notice.

As she ran out of the shed to go back to her dorm, Kevin had turned to me with a rather disgusting looking smile. His expression was euphoric, reminiscent of a boy who just found out about the wonders of the female body.

"Dude, she smelled so sweet!" He described her all too aromatic scent, "The sweat mixed with her nice flowery bookworm odor, it really meshed into an unforgettably fine aroma!"

"I do not care." I pushed him aside, "Let's just look for what we need and get out of here."

For the next couple of minutes, the two of us had practically turned the entire place upside down. Still, we hadn't found much, though there was one worthy thing of note.

"Dude!" Kevin turned to holler at me, "You're not gonna believe it!"

"What is the matter?" I paused my inspecting to run over to him, "Did you find anything?"

"Check this - "Detectives Monthly!" Do you have any idea what this is?" He plastered the magazine on my face.

"No clue." I backed away.

"It's a porn mag!" He smiled, "Lucky! I didn't think there were students in this place willing to risk it all for a quick wank! Thank goodness it was hidden away under this pile of trash, otherwise Kiria would've surely seen it."

"I am going back to searching for clues..." I rolled my Eyes.

"Oh come on, don't be a prude!" He smiled deviously as he opened a random page, "Eugh, why is it all men!?"

Men? There is such a magazine? I wonder if it's meant to be used by women. Wait, a magazine for women named "Detectives Monthly", mademoiselle was found locked inside all by herself, sweaty and disheveled. Hey, I'm naive in most cases, but even I can tell what exactly is going on here.

"Knowing her, she probably got fooled by someone into entering the storeroom under the false pretense of finding another detective novel." I shook my head as I continued searching, "Peers can be so cruel sometimes."

"Heh, this guy kinda looks like you, Meil!" Kevin chuckled, "Ugh, the page is all sticky..."

"Would you stop looking at naked men and help me find what we're looking for!?" I yelled back.

"Excuse you. I just wanna know how my size fares in comparison to the competition." He gave me a nasty side-eye as if I was the one in the wrong, "Think about it. All these guys are considered "The male optimum", so by measuring their schlongs and comparing them to mine, I can properly ascertain my worth as a man!"

"You know, I do not even care anymore..." I sighed as I spotted something peeking out of a pile of trash, "Hm? What is this?"

"Nice! Looks like I'm pretty well above average!" Kevin continued looking through the magazine on his own, "Except for the dark-skinned dude. No one compares to him."

"Kevin! Come over here this instant and help me with this!" I yelled for him to join me in digging the thing out of the trash pile, "This could very well be the thing we're looking for!"

"Huh? Oh right, I totally forgot!" He threw the magazine aside as he yanked a notebook out of the trash pile, "This the thing you were talking about?"

"Possibly. Please read its contents for me."

Opening the book, we were surprised to see a huge string of random numbers and letters. All of the other pages were blank, leading us to believe this was left here on purpose for someone to find. Who though, we were unsure. The random string of letters were 4f6e20746865206e69676874206f662074686520666573746976616c2c207765207368616c6c20756e69746520746f206272696e672062616c616e636520746f205468652053797374656d2e, and after that, the encrypted message concluded with "Praise Jethro" as the only part that was written normally, and in Entropic no less.

Right, I'm not sure if this is what we were looking for, nor am I sure if this is the exact thing Lemmy was talking about, but I should definitely make a point to remember this tidbit of information. For now though, we should continue our search before...

"Dude." Kevin tugged me by the shoulder, "It's dawn."

"Damn, follow me then!" I took the notebook and ran outside, "Make sure to lock the door too, we do not want anyone to find us!"

"And why is that?" A burlier voice rang out through our ears.

"P-Professor Jethro!?" We jumped back.

"You two. Follow me to my office." He motioned for us to get going, "Come on! The hell are you standing around for!? Get your asses over here!"

Glancing at each other as if unsure of what to do, we figured our best bet was to do as he says for now and explain ourselves fully instead of just running away, thus only incriminating us further. Besides, if we're lucky, we might get to call in Lemmy or the mademoiselle to vouch for us.

"Alright..." I sighed, "But wait. Professor, why are you here so early in the morning? The Sun has not even come out yet."

"What kind of question is that?" He growled, "I heard mademoiselle Archambeau's voice all the way from inside my office, so I came to see if she needed assistance."

"And what were you doing in your office all night?" Kevin thought he got him with this question.

"I guess I'll excuse your stupidity with the fact that you're new here, pipsqueak." The professor chuckled maliciously, "I'm on nightshift duty every Wednesday and Saturday."

Dammit, he's not lying in the slightest. He really was on night duty this night. What rotten luck too, as his office is the one closest to the storeroom, meaning he would obviously hear the mademoiselle's cries for help. Damn, we're completely screwed no matter how you look at it. Though thankfully, since it was still dark out, the professor didn't see the notebook in my hands, so I managed to chuck it in the nearby bushes while I had the chance. We're at least safe on that front, and I've already memorised the encrypted message fully. Now all we need to do is not blow this interrogation. Gex Jethro, just how exactly are you associated with the Glitch?