Prevna waited until we were settled in our little alcove in Mishtaw’s dome to speak her mind. She started slow, leaned back against the wall on her bedroll and staring up at the pine cone lantern.

“How do you think the others are doing?”

I stopped trying to carefully lay down in a way that wouldn’t make any of my wounds twinge to look over at her. Like as not, I’d end up having to lay in an undignified lump on my stomach and that wasn’t a comfortable position to hold a conversation in. Still, she hadn’t asked the question like she expected an answer and my throat would likely take at least until tomorrow to recover with the medicine so I just shrugged.

She answered her own question, “Even though Jin doesn’t like Mishtaw, she’s probably going to be even more merciless now that the death bringers dared to attack her and Eliss. That healer might get condemned to since she helped and the sister since she taught him poisons in the first place. I’m not sure if anyone will think to escort the Red Hands back to their camp.”

Her expression didn’t change as she spoke. Just a bit tense and pensive, like what she was saying wasn’t what she actually wanted to say from start to finish, and I hated it. That wasn’t how Prevna was supposed to sound or look. Like she was just waiting for a trap to snap or she was so frustrated she couldn’t think of a single teasing comment.

I kept watching her and waited for whatever came next.

“What would you do if I ran into trouble every chance I got?” Prevna let her head tilt lazily to the side so she could look me dead in the eyes. But there was nothing lazy about her gaze—that was pure challenge.

“What would you do,” she pressed, “if I kept getting stabbed and poisoned and nearly killed a dozen different ways over and over again?”

I jabbed a finger into my left thigh, where we both knew my bless mark lay. She looked thoroughly unimpressed.

“You might not die but that doesn’t mean you’re invincible. That spear could have hit your spine! Someone in my band took a wound like that from a boar tusk and she couldn’t walk after.”

I knew she was right. Knew that sooner or later if I kept throwing myself in front of weapons, with no regard for anything but getting in front of it, I’d be struck by a wound a I couldn’t fully recover from.

But that didn’t mean I could easily disregard the instinct to get in the way, especially when I knew that meant I could control one particular outcome: if I took an attack in place of someone else than everyone lived. Every time.

I didn’t particularly care about everyone but Prevna and Mishtaw were important and they cared about others which meant they’d be unhappy if those others died. And I knew the cohort and…I didn’t want to admit it but I doubted I was callous enough to watch someone else die when I knew I could take the same blow and live. I didn’t particularly want to be injured and half-dead all the time but it made sense more often than not to take control and take the injury. I was used to it, I’d recover, and the other person would be fine.

Prevna huffed out a breathe and reached over to flick me on the forehead. “I can see you calculating the odds. That’s not the point. The point,” she flicked me again on the leg for extra emphasis, “is that you sacrifice yourself without any regard for anyone else or what they think and you’re getting worse about it. You didn’t even try to block the spear meant for Eliss so it wouldn’t skewer you!”

I snagged one of my shoes I had taken off earlier and chucked it at her gut. She flinched and tried to catch it but the shoe had already hit her ribs. I crossed my arms and gave her a look that asked if she had time to block that.

Despite everything that made a small smile tug at the corner of her mouth. “You’re terrible.” Then she chucked the shoe back at me so it hit me in the chest. “I’m not the one who insists on testing out every way to die!”

I glowered at her and she glowered right back until she ran a hand back over her face and stated, “I’m worried about you and if you won’t listen until I’m the one stuck recovering for days on end then, maybe, I’ll be the one who takes a blow for someone else next.”

My eyes strayed down to my bedroll. I couldn’t keep looking at her after that declaration. Didn’t know how to deal with the earnest concern in her expression or the thought of Prevna being terribly wounded for someone else. Though I’d definitely make whoever she saved regret their incompetency so she wouldn’t need to make that fool’s choice ever again.

“Gimley?” I glanced back up at her. She sat with her head propped on one knee, her arms wrapped around her leg. “You don’t have to do everything. Trust us a little.”

I flushed and hastily looked away from her again while shoving a newly created mental image of the way the light from the pine cone lantern caught her features into a sack in my memory tent. It held other purposefully ignored memories of Prevna and was slowly becoming overstuffed, but I still refused to let that…unwelcome awareness of her ruin our friendship. Just like I couldn’t let her think I’d ignore her in favor of injuring myself over and over again just because I could.

So I forced myself to face her again and nodded with as much earnest confidence as I could muster. I could trust her at least.

She grinned back. “Good. You’re more fun to tease when you’re not halfway to the Silver Forest.”

I rolled my eyes and hid my relief that she wasn’t still brooding in the corner.

- -

Esie found us at Mishtaw’s place bright and early the next morning. She whistled outside the door to let us know she was there and then whistled again when we met her on the balcony. I had changed into a spare set of clothes so I was no longer wearing the ones that had been ruined between all the attacks I’d taken, but I couldn’t quite hide the stiff way I moved. Prevna also had a few visible scratches and a bandaged cut that peeked out from her sleeve.

“I heard you went to see Corrin last night, but it looks like you had a rough time of it even before you got a spear to the back,” Esie said.

I kept my chin up. My throat wasn’t completely recovered but I could speak short sentences thanks now that the medicine the healer insisted on had time to work. “They got it worse.”

She grinned. “Glad to hear it.” Esie gestured to the walkway that connected Mishtaw’s place to the rest of the residential branch it sprouted from. “I feel like a walk. Gimley, won’t you join me while Prevna catches up with your cohort?”

Prevna accepted the dismissal without a word of protest. We both knew that if Esie was purposefully leaving her out than whatever discussion she wanted to have likely had to do with the Lady of Calm Waters. My ever elusive patron. I’d tell her what I could when we met back later too.

So Prevna just gently bumped her shoulder against mine and whispered, “Don’t worry I’ll hold Wren’s hand for you.”

I glared at her while she walked away but that just made her chuckle. Her teasing when it came to my supposed crush on Wren had become more infrequent but sometimes she still couldn’t resist a small poke or two. I could never decide if I was more annoyed or relieved that she kept it up.

Esie stretched and chuckled too. “Something I should know?”

I shook my head and left it at that. Esie effortlessly wasted another minute or two letting me know what she had heard about the death bringer purge in the Cut. She seemed to know that my throat was still too raw to hold a proper conversation, but she carried it on easily enough until we wouldn’t be right on Prevna’s heels when she lead me to whatever she wanted to show me.

Esie had a penchant for taking me to something beautiful whenever we had one of our talks. Sometimes that meant an ice sculpture carved into the ice vines like the pair of hands she taken me to that first time or sometimes it was as simple as a view of the sunset. I wasn’t sure if it was because the places she took me to tended to be deserted or if she liked the excuse to go see whatever she decided to show me. Either way we always walked to where she wanted to go without using the shadows. I was sure she knew I had enough skill now to get at least close to where I wanted to go in the Seedling Palace, if the shadow I needed wasn’t too small. Despite that, we always took the firestarters’ paths even when we went from one side of the Palace to the other.

This time we ended up in a bright amber sap dome near the bottom of the Caretakers’ tree where the branches were the thickest. The bottom branches of the gigantic pines tended to be where the firestarters lived, but Caretakers’ pine had become a hub of residential areas for whisper women as well shrines for prayer and small areas to relax or reflect in peace. It hadn’t surprised me when I had learned that, technically, the six sects of whisper women were correlated with one of the six pine trees that made up the Seedling Palace. What did surprise me was some of the things that ended up being born out of that association.

Like this dome. It clearly had no functional purpose other than being a quiet, pretty place. Holes had been cut in the ceiling in the shape of an abstract flower and pine lantern had been hung above, not inside, the dome, so that the light shone down to create the flower pattern on the floor as well. Some benches and ice vines curled along the inside of the dome, but they almost seemed like an afterthought covered in partial shadow compared to the bright pattern dominating the center of the space. A sanctuary, even it was a far cry from the Grove Fellen and I stumbled into when we escaped Flickermark.

Esie took a long moment to tilt her head back and take in the carved ceiling. I kept my focus on her. I still didn’t know much more about her than the next to nothing I knew about the Lady of Calm Waters. I knew she tended to be easygoing and liked artwork, Mil’s nectar, and the stars. That Kaylan, the lazy sentry, was her lover, and that Esie seemed to take her role as the Lady of Calm Water’s intermediary seriously. Other than that I hadn’t glean much else. I didn’t even know what her blessing was or what sect she technically belonged to.

Though between her and Mishtaw I got the distinct impression that I seemed to draw in those that didn’t adhere as easily to the strict separation of the different sects.

Esie directed my attention toward the dome. “What do you think?”

I raised my eyebrows back and shrugged.

She smiled while slowly shaking her head at that. “No appreciation. Well, best to move on business if you’re that unimpressed.” She gave me a narrow eyed look like I couldn’t quite read. “Our Lady would like to call in a favor.”

I stared at her and she grinned, clearly satisfied by shocking me. I choked out, “What? Why?”

Never once since Esie had first offered the Lady of Calm Water’s help had she ever called in favor. I couldn’t imagine why now, out of nowhere, she was suddenly interested in me doing something for her.

“It came to her esteemed attention that you will be spending some time in the inner valleys of the Lower Broken Spear Peaks. She has a…friend there that she would like you to meet. That friend can be quite elusive so if you manage to meet her and give her this,” Esie held out a small stone with a spiral within a spiral carved into it, “she’ll consider it a favor completed.”

I took the stone and looked it over for a moment before carefully placing it in a pouch. “How will I know?”

Esie shifted so the petals of light slide across her features. “She’s very distinctive. Long hair, long arms, taller than anyone you’ve ever seen.” She saw that I was about to protest so she added, “Even Creed—and no it’s not Sonya. This friend isn’t a whisper woman and She doesn’t leave those mountains.”

I blinked. Why would the Lady of Calm Waters care about someone who wasn’t a whisper woman? I got the impression that she had to be fairly high ranked to have Esie as her personal helper, so it seemed doubtful that she would still have connections with a random tribe member.

Esie patted me on the shoulder. “If you can’t find her, don’t worry. She can’t be found if she doesn’t want to be, so my mistress won’t punish you if you can’t her.” She winked. “You’ll just still our Lady that favor.”

My jaw set. I could look for this “friend” and help Mishtaw with her relic search at the same time. No matter how much Esie warned me that she’d be difficult to find I wouldn’t fail. Not when this was the first time my patron was putting her trust in me.