On the last day of the 2015 school calendar year, the recess ceremony for all the teachers and students of Zhonggang Junior High School started after each class moved the desks, chairs, and class debris into the classroom of the new grade. More than 1,500 people gathered together in the stadium in front of the Zhongshan Building, which was specially set up for raising the national flag.

On the podium, Principal Wu Limin addressed the teachers and students into the overhead microphone. From the beginning of school until now, probably only on the day of the recess ceremony can he speak so fast.

Principal, you seem to want the holiday more than we do, don't you？Students thought.

On the surface, Class 10th, grade 2, who was dead on the surface, showed a strange robot-like smile. Even though they were unable to unite internally in the year when they met for the first time in the first year of junior high school, at the beginning of the second semester, the 30 unrelated students who were originally like a mess suddenly became in harmony with each other, and even the feelings between each other quickly developed.

Visible to the naked eye, chatting face-to-face is two chairs, and instantly becomes a chair that may be crowded with three or four people. Even though 10th class is still lazy in the eyes of other teachers and students, when one of them is bullied by students from other classes, they unanimously quarrel with that damn guy to the end.

But there will still be innocuous little jokes between them.

It's basically, "I can torture you, but if any idiot asshole wants to touch a hair of yours, let me stab his throat first", which sounds quite like the plot of a domineering boss' novel.

This phenomenon is especially common in the five-person group called the "Five Kings" by the students in this class. The so-called five kings refer to the five people in Class 10th who have special decision-making power - not because of gang members, but simply because other classmates are too lazy to make decisions - they are the leader Zu Yuxin, the implementer Mu Yongtan, and the advisor Wu Jiaying , publicist Zheng Huangrong, and mascot Wu Peien.

Huh？Only now did she discover that Zheng Huangrong had the same name as the heroine in a martial arts book written by Master Jin Yong, but they only had the same pronunciation but different characters.

It is said that the sun which is doing its occupation is a little too enthusiastic... Yu Ruoling shook her head slightly. The expressionless teenage girl with black hair that had grown to her waist frowned, feeling that something would happen today...something not so good.

Trying to avoid physical contact with unfamiliar schoolmates, and be forced to drift with the crowd. Among the crowd of peers who are rushing home from school to have fun, Yu Ruoling inexplicably feels the dizziness that she has never experienced since graduating from Star Elementary School with nausea, and suffering from overwhelming compression resulting in disorientation and ringing in the ears.

It's like a grasshopper buzzing in her ears, but no matter how she listen to the sound to distinguish it, she still can't identify who is who.

A strange, amnesia-like blankness rushed to her heart like a gust of wind. In an instant, she suddenly felt like a lonely leaf floating in the wind. The sadness and despair of not knowing when to land and where to go, was abandoned in the torrent. A fucking loser...

"Sis！"Then, she suddenly caught this playful and lively clear female voice that stands out from the noisy, meaningless noise.

"Well well, my sis, why are you standing here？Do you want the sun to tan you into dry skin？"Dong Tinghua didn't care at all whether Yu Ruoling was standing at the gate staring at the empty sky in a daze. As before, she boldly grabbed the overhanging arm, and stuck her whole body on it.

Perhaps Yu Ruoling's body language and general language expressed intentionally or unconsciously made her care a little bit. Sometimes Yu is indifference that does not want to care about anyone or anything, like a machine without emotion；sometimes it is caring for everyone, and even more chic and arrogant.

Dong Tinghua probably understands such extreme scales, but she doesn't want to know more about it. In any case, Yu Ruoling is still her "Sis", the first sister she knew - since the first grade of elementary school - when her family immigrated to Taiwan from Province Guangdong, China. Yu is who also has part of Guangdong in her blood, just like Dong Tinghua.

"The sun is too big, I have a headache."

"Are you free at noon？Let's go have lunch together！"

Yu Ruoling looks at her, who has always acted illogically, but in the end it always produces a string of unbelievably good results, a friend who feels like a younger sister - Yu is not sure that it is normal for friends to exist and is with this kind of feeling.

Yu thought in doubt, and then curved a smile that looked quite ferocious from the side. She raised her right hand and pressed it directly on Dong's shoulder. The behavior of the two seemed to be normal, but in fact, one helped another to leave Zhonggang Junior High School.

*

The situation did not improve. Until at night when she was tossing and turning alone on the double bed, Yu Ruoling was startled that the symptom had reappeared.

It happened once during the short-term mission during the winter vacation of the second grade. That kind of despair, grief, anger, resentment, sadness, bitterness, darkness, irritability...

However, this time is different from the perception described above.

She tightly grasped a corner of the quilt, and suddenly covered her head, curled up in the quilt, trembling in fear. But she tried to control her reason to stop the fluctuations of her brain, but it was completely ineffective.

It's not about recalling nightmares and horror or reappearance of the past, just pure, unreasonable fear. 'Nonononono...why it is always been me...？”

In a short 14-year life by now, 9 of them were full of bullying and insults. She thought she could be regarded as a little monster who could be squeezed into the ranks of "a little miserable", why dose everything keep pushing her into the unfathomable valley of the shadow of death...

'Why is everything upon on me？God, what exactly do you want！'

'You made me endure those years of loneliness, and took away my only beloved brother and my father. I was free from the oppression of my peers, and you made Suhangyi and Muxi the responsibility I should be responsible for... Until now...the nightmare continues, even if... Even entering the Youth is not eligible to be a part of them. You gave me an inferior status, why would you allow the power that does not belong to you to drag me into hell！'

'Why don't you save me...？'

'Why was I born in this world？'

'Why did you choose me...'

'Why let a waste who lives in a deep valley without sunlight climb to the ground...？'

'Why give me hope, but still let me down in the end？'

'Why did you just doom my existence and sacrifice yourself to save me...？'

'Why keep me alive...'

Yu Ruoling slightly parted her lips and muttered to herself, tears streaming down her expressionless and unwavering face, only her hands tightly clutching the corner of the quilt showed her extremely struggling and painful heart.

A strong sense of suffocation pinched her neck fiercely, her eye sockets were sore, astringent and painful, but nothing could compare to the pain in her chest that was almost torn apart forcefully.

She is still just a coward who follows the law of truth and cannot commit suicide, but can't die, and also can't live either...

As time passed, her consciousness gradually fell into a deep sleep, as if the moment the current was cut off, her clenched hands were loosened. Eyes filled with sadness instantly suppressed all emotions, slowly got up from the quilt, leaned gently on the white and brown bedside.

Right arm covered the scars all over eyes.

Fong Xuan opened the door as if nothing had happened, and went into the bathroom to wipe away the dried tears with a towel.

"She" once again made an exchange without Yu Ruoling's consent, taking control of her body.

The autonomy of "her" is becoming more and more obvious, in contrast, Yu's spiritual level is getting weaker and weaker. After the fierce battle against the darkness at the short missio, that night, she relied more and more on "her" every time. Almost every week, Fong Xuan could sense the time to regain control of this body through the conscious emotions in Yu's brain.

It might be one night, it might be a whole day, it might even be two days. Then, when quietly settling in sleep, "she" sends out her consciousness again.

"She" falls back into the pillow, and in the future, Yu Ruoling can no longer be called prime-p, but should be called the main personality. On the contrary, “she” would be called the sub-personality, a real dissociative identity disorder.

Even though she still knows that "she" has not disappeared, no matter how Yu Ruoling calls "her", even if "she" hears and responds, Yu can no longer hear it. The link between them has been broken, and the demons have begun to flee. Fong Xuan closed “her” eyes and thought, the days to come... No, only the one who can save her from the burning pain like a lake of fire, the unbearable darkness, the eternal abyss.

"She" is actually an unreasonable existence, but before Yu Ruoling lets go of her obsession, please allow "her" to be her agent temporarily.

Fong Xuan sighed, that the king who has authority in heaven and earth, the Lord of Lords, God's holy scapegoat.

Son of God - Jesus Christ.