168. Loss: Wiremu.

The biggest thing I lost was my bow. It was custom-made for me in Jern and was the only thing that survived my fight with the Lavaman. I dropped it when Otto grabbed me, and then Puia turned the floor into lava, which it did not survive. I grabbed the bows from the archers but couldn’t even pull it with my full strength without it breaking. Luckily there were two archers.

I harvested the Monster Core from the griffon along with a few other parts, feathers, beak and claws. I wasn’t in any state to carry a lot and found someone's blanket to wrap it in and carry it over my shoulder. We needed to get away from here. The smoke from the smouldering grass will blend into the smoke from the smouldering ranch buildings, but we weren’t in any shape to deal with more ranch hands.

We walked for three hours till I found a sheltered spot by a creek and made a rough camp. My stomach was seriously paining me, and I knew Tāoke was hurting from the arrows. We settled down to rest and heal.

I looked at my Status, and I had a new Class Specialisation. Bond Master, which was a specialisation of Hunter. It gave four attribute points. Three were assigned, one each to Mental Strength and Perception and one to Spiritual Strength. It came with a skill Bond Care, which worked with Anaylse Bonds to help people find the right bonds and to assist in bonding. It also helped to break incompatible bonds. I would need to work to see how it helped others, but we had plenty of people in the camp with bonds for me to work at. I used it on myself, and I could help the flow of energy between Puia, Tāoke and myself. With lots of energy, Puia could channel some to Tāoke and me to power our Regeneration Skill. Bond Care made it possible even though my elemental Bond with Puia was barely at the Apprentice level.

My Assassin Class also levelled. It was a messy assassination, but I guess it worked. My Hunter Class had a lot of Specialisations. It was a very versatile class. I currently have Monster Hunter, Scout, Assassin and Bond Master, all from Hunter. Quarry Worker has Prospector, and Spy still needs to be at a higher level to specialise. I have been neglecting my Spy class. In summary, I have a lot of low levelled specialisations that need work.

I had the points, so I added enough to get Mental Perception to 30. This low level was probably also hampering my Spy Class.

The trap I created levelled my Trapping Skill, but I know I need to work on hiding the traps. Molten Rock and Thermal Manipulation (Mineral) levelled along with Deceive. The levelling of Granite Spike and Granite Sand was expected, as was Snakeskin and Regeneration.

I also have a new Skill, Lava Dart. That was unexpected as I don’t have an equivalent Granite Dart. I just made them with my Granite manipulation. Maybe that is why I have a new Lava Dart Skill because there is no near equivalent.

I felt a significant jump toward my Warrior Class when I identified myself. I must talk to Appā when I catch up to the caravan, but I think I am very close. Fighting Sapients is definitely different to fighting beasts. A beast would have run straight into the trap, but Otto didn’t. He could sense something was wrong even though he didn't know what it was. It is that intelligence I need to account for in my fighting and trapping.

We stayed hidden the next day and left at Dusk to try and catch the caravan. My gut was healed enough for me to jog, and Tāoke kept up easily. I could tell he wanted to reduce size and be carried, but his wounds needed to heal some more first.

We didn’t catch up to the caravan that night, but Nyx found us near dawn, and the Canine Queens came and picked us up. Tāoke was coiled in his favourite spot on Oske while I rode a spare horse they brought for me. Skavt frowned at our still healing wounds, knowing the level of my Regeneration Skill. We caught the caravan when it stopped for the evening, and Astrid and Ört checked our wounds, but there wasn’t much left for them to do.

“Are you sure he’s dead?” Lyla asked.

Tabitha, Lyla and I were in Mayakku’s enchanted wagon. “I buried him in lava so absolutely,” I said. “They won’t even find a body.”

“Can you do the same for me?” Lyla asked.

“What?”

“The struggle is too much. The constant struggle just to think against the gale. I can’t do it any more,” she replied.

“There are bound to be healers in Beitemark or Kirghiz that can help,” Tabitha said.

“I don’t want help. I want it to be over.”

“We are only three days out of Beitemark. Let's see what is available there before we do anything that we can’t reverse. I could get you there tomorrow,” Tabitha argued.

“No! I just can’t think. My mind is a mess. My body is a mess,” she waved a hand at her misformed wings, “The worst is that I am losing my mind. I can’t think!” she yelled.

Tabitha was barely holding it together here. I could tell she was having flashbacks to Jern and Eyslk, the abused elven slave she had to kill. I saw a tear slip down a cheek.

“I will do it myself, but I don’t want to be found,” Lyla said. “Will you help?”

I nodded silently. I had no idea of her struggle. I am just glad I killed Otto, regardless of the struggle and the potential consequences to come.

“Tonight. I want to go tonight,” she continued. “Now, if we can.”

I just nodded again.

“Is there anyone you would like us to tell?” Tabitha asked.

“The Sher Pride in Bilee.”

“We will get a message to them,” I assured her.

“Can we go now?” She emptied her pouch on the desk. “I just need a knife.”

“I will go. You stay,” I said to Tabitha.

I followed Lyla out into the night. We found a rocky area, and she asked for a knife. “Thank you,” she said.

I reached out and stroked her head. She leaned into it as a cat would. I had tears running down my face, and then I spiked her brain, as that was the most painless way I could think of. I don’t know how she planned to do it with a knife, but this was faster and I hoped she was finally at peace. I laid her body out gently on the rock. I didn’t burn her. I manipulated the rock, so she was lowered into it and then sealed it over the top to entomb her. I didn’t mark it. I left no sign anything was there.

I sat for hours contemplating this world and life and death. I had just killed twenty people two days ago and felt no remorse, not even for the wounded I killed. Yet Lyla was different. I would have saved her if I could. Instead, I killed her. I have no answers.

Tabitha arrived after a couple of hours, and we sat together in silence until the sun rose.