Chapter Forty-Five - Realtoring

“The housing market was turning into an increasingly dangerous bubble in North America in the end of the 2010s.

As it turns out, all that was needed to pop that was an alien invasion.”

--Anonymous on the price of homes, 2022

***

I stayed by Lucy as we made our way down the side of the building and towards the museum’s entrance. I idly noticed bullet holes here and there, and stains on the ground where antithesis had bled out.

Signs left over from my fight here a few days ago?

I supposed that the carrion antithesis had grabbed most of the bodies at some point, or a cleaning crew had come around already.

I was a little worried that a stray gust would pick Lucy and fling her off the side. Which was silly, of course, but it didn’t stop me from placing myself between her and the drop. If I was blown off the edge, I had options, she didn’t, and she was still new to the whole, walking-without-crutches thing.

We did make it to the bottom safely, though Lucy paused to catch her breath.

“You okay?” I asked.

“I need to do more cardio. And maybe eat a little bit less,” Lucy said.

“I can certainly think of a few ways to get your heart beating,” I said.

She snorted. “Not out here.”

“Hah! No, it’s a bit chilly for that.”

We found someone waiting for us at the front of the museum, a woman, maybe in her mid-thirties, and wearing a nice corporate-style long coat and shades. She had a suitcase by her side, and was staring off into the sky in the way someone looking at their media feeds did while bored.

“Hey!” I called out.

The woman snapped out of it, looked to us, then put on a smile that I immediately pinged as fake. “Hello,” she said. “You’re right on time.”

“Cool,” I said. “I’m Cat, this is Lucy.”

“I’m Jessica Washington, from Washington, Smith and Associates. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

She extended her hand, and I hesitated just a moment before shaking with my cybernetic arm. “Yeah,” I said. “So, we were kinda interested in the place. You intend to give us a tour or something?”

“Of course,” Jessica was all smiles. “At Washington and Smith, we prize our clients above all else, but we’re also very discerning about who we take on as a client, and to whom we will sell their property. We only want the best for the city, of course.”

My eyes were practically glazing over at all the corporate talk. “Uh-huh,” I said. “Point being?”

“Well, miss... Cat, your credit score isn’t quite able to meet the demands of purchasing a floor in a building such as this one. You can imagine our concern for our client’s well-being.”

“You, uh, do know that I’m a samurai, right?” I asked. “I thought that bit was, like, really obvious.”

“I’m aware, yes,” Jessica said. “But your status as one of humanity’s protectors doesn’t ensure that you will be capable of meeting payment requirements, and the potential losses of time and money for our client need to be accounted for when viewing any potential contracts and agreements.”

My eyes narrowed.

Then Lucy jumped in. “What she’s trying to say, I think, is that even if you’re a totally cool samurai, you’re still a newbie one, and they’re not sure you can make all the big payments for a place like this. It is a lot of money. So she’s trying to ease you into paying even more so that they don't need to worry.”

“A guarantee, or a larger sum paid for the lot, would do a lot to reassure my clients,” Jessica said.

“That sounds like bullshit,” I said.

Lucy shook her head. “No no, it’s cause you’re thinking about it wrong. This lady here isn’t working for us, she’s working for her clients. The polite act’s just an act.”

Jessica’s smile broke off, and she sighed. “That’s essentially correct. My clients heard that the person interested in purchasing the building was a samurai, and they insisted that we bring up the price as a consequence of that.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “That makes sense, I guess,” I said. Of course people would get greedy. It just made sense. “What’s the price now?”

“Three hundred and fifty million credits.”

“That’s... it was at two-hundred ninety-eight million credits last night. That’s one hell of a jump,” I said.

“They wanted to double it outright, but we convinced them not to. Doubling the cost would make it disproportionately more expensive than the value of the buildings around this area. It wouldn’t make sense to buy this one at that price then.”

“And three-fifty is reasonable?” I asked.

Jessica tilted her head from side to side. “It’s not far from it. Were the building in perfect shape, without any recent incursions, then yes, it could go for that kind of price given enough time on the market and some interest.”

“But the place looks like shit now,” I said.

“That’s why it’s initial offer price was so low at just under three hundred million.”

I scoffed. “That’s just silly. Did you guys talk to Longbow yet?”

The woman blinked. “The man on the cereal boxes?”

“The samurai, yeah,” I said. “He had a gun-emplacement on the roof.”

She nodded. “That was a factor leading to the price being so high.”

“Yeah, but someone in the building sabotaged it,” I said.

Jessica twitched. It was really minute, and I almost missed it, but there was definitely a flinch there. “Really?”

“Yup. And the vaults in the back of the building are fake. Like, literally made of cardboard. Myalis, you got anything on that?” I asked.

“Myalis?” she asked.

“My AI,” I explained.

I do indeed. If your goal is to intimidate the woman, then I’d advise allowing me to enter the conversation. A low-cost drone would be more than enough.

I nodded. “That sounds great.”

New Purchase: Light Communications Drone

Points reduced to... 6910

A box appeared before me, and I snapped it out of the air, popped it open, and let the tiny drone within whizz out. It was no bigger than a closed fist, and looked about as durable as some of the third-hand toys we’d played with at the orphanage.

“Greetings,” Myalis said. “I’m Vanguard Stray Cat’s assistant, Myalis. She has asked for my assistance regarding some things.”

“A pleasure,” Jessica said. “Should we step inside? If we’re going to be negotiating, I’d rather do it within the building. Privacy and all. Also, it’s not as cold.”

I looked to the side and noticed Lucy hugging herself for warmth, then nodded. “Yeah, that’s a good idea.”

The android that had been in the front entrance the first time we came was long gone, and the security doors had been torn right off their hinges. Still, the lobby was a bit warmer, and there were chairs along the sides next to posters of various samurai in action and some poorly disguised ads.

“So, did you intend to tell folks that the vault in this place is fake?” I asked.

“Technically, it meets all specifications to be considered a vault,” Jessica said.

“Are you shitting me?”

Myalis’ little drone slid closer. “She is, technically, correct. The guidelines on what can and can’t be considered a vault are lax, and the interpretation of ‘a large room with minimal survival equipment’ could be accepted as enough to consider the room in this building as a vault.”

I shook my head. “No way. I don’t care what any law says, that vault isn’t real. It’s fake.”

“We could lower the price in consequence of--”

“And I haven’t spoken to Longbow yet, but I’m pretty sure he was still pissed about his AA system being fucked with. Pretty sure he’s going to turn around and hit whomever owned the place for that particular fuck-up.”

“I... will inform my clients of that,” Jessica said.

Lucy smiled. It was one of her terrifying smiles, the sort that was also a little hot. “Go ahead. Of course, I’m sure Cat could help cool Longbow down. In the end, they need to weigh how much they’ll lose, versus how much they have to gain in trying to sell this place.”

Jessica rolled her eyes. “You two might think you’re being clever, but I see what you’re trying to do. Truth is, I’m only getting a commission on this place, and it’s not that great to begin with. Still, I need to make ends meet, so even if this place had been a baby skinning factory, we’d still try to sell it at a price that was at least fair compared to the current market values. You can threaten and posture all you like, and you might even have the right of it, but unless you plan on just stealing the place, then we’ll have to insist that you pay a fair price.”

I stared at Jessica. The woman had brass balls. Though, to be fair, she was kinda right. Just cause the place had nearly been the death of me, didn’t mean I could just take it.

My temptation to be a bitch warred with my sense of what was fair for a bit, then I crossed my arms. “Fine. Let’s talk prices then. Fair prices.”

***