Her heart had been fluttering erratically like the heart of a trapped deer by its carnivorous prey. Salman had again asked her what was wrong but she just shrugged it off. Now in the silence of the night, she lay on her side, fretting what was to come. No way could she meet Daud again. What if Salman finds out? She feared his anger and to the extent he could go to damage others in his wrath. Glancing over her shoulder to make sure Salman was sleeping, she silently typed a text message to a certain "Dania".

In the last few days, she hadn't done anything that she should be guilty of but Salman was a very possessive and jealous man. She couldn't risk in communicating with Daud at all. Sighing, she deleted all texts and calls from "Dania".

She was petrified. There was no point in this friendship. She had been reminding herself over and over again. But her heart betrayed her each time. She craved for some cherished moments of happiness. More than that, she longed for some moments of just being herself. She missed that. With Salman she had to be cautious about every single move she took or every word that slipped from her mouth.

She closed her eyes tightly in agony. When she was single she used to make fun of those women who were scared of their spouse. How ironic today she was facing the same situation. A scornful smile spread on her lips, she was afraid of Salman. There was no doubt about that. In just a few months of their marriage, he had rooted one big fact in their marriage – he had control over every matter. And if she didn't follow his lead, she was to face the raging man ready to attack her at every step she took.

Her eyelids rose and the dull night sky with scattered clouds peeked through the gaps of the curtains. Daud was different. He could touch her heart with only few words or just the way he looked. There was nothing degrading the way he spoke or looked. Instead he treated her like his equal. Her husband had never treated her equally. She was always looked down upon. Mocked at all times, although, if she was honest with herself at the start of their relationship he had been accommodating. Those days she had still felt at ease with him. But now...

She had no words to describe her anguish.

Her head ached. It was better to sleep, tomorrow was a new dawn. Perhaps her life would seem brighter then.

But not all days were bright...

****

The next evening, Nawal was unpacking Salman's bag that he had taken for the business trip when she found specialized handmade chocolates. Salman was busy in the study even after coming back from work hours earlier. After placing all the clothes in their designated places, holding the chocolates she quietly tapped on the study door.

Opening the door a little, she peeked through it, "Do you have a minute?"

His gaze lifted from the laptop screen and he nodded.

Sauntering in the study room, she showed him the chocolates, "Who are these for?"

"For you."

Her eyebrows furrowed, "Me?"

He nodded as he glanced at the report in front of him, "Ya I forgot to give it to you yesterday. I know you like chocolates, right?" His gaze flickered on her face.

Slowly nodding, she was surprised he thought to buy her anything at all during the time he was away. He had been very distracted even during their phone calls.

"Thank you." She whispered and whirled around to leave him.

It was an hour later, she was munching on a hazelnut chocolate and reading through her marketing scholarly paper when Salman walked over to the bed. Stretching on the bed beside her, he rolled to his side to face her, "How have been your classes?"

Stunned, she abandoned the book on her lap and slowly answered, "It is getting busy now. We are nearly coming to the end of the semester. Last month left so many assignments and project submissions coming up." It was surprising to find him asking about her studies at all.

He grabbed her hand that was holding the remaining chocolate bar, bringing to his mouth he took a bite of the chocolate, "Hey, it's good."

"You didn't try any?"

He shook his head.

Unwrapping the rest of the chocolate, she offered him, "Here."

He again shook his head, "I got it for you. I don't want it."

She smiled a little, "I am being very nice in offering chocolate. You know I wouldn't otherwise."

He chuckled, "I don't mind you being selfish over chocolates. I will always be here to buy you more."

She stared at his face, her smile sliding away.

He easily noticed the change in her demeanour, "What is it?"

She wasn't able to express what she felt. She was relieved he was back but scared at the same time. When he was away she had nearly gone astray and deep down she felt guilty about that. She spoke earnestly, "It's nice to have you back home."

His eyes lightened, "Does this mean you missed me?"

She avoided answering his question instead said honestly, "I was scared."

His forehead creased, "Scared of what?"

"Demons that haunt me."

Baffled, he asked again, "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing. I am being my silly self again. Let's just leave it."

"You are not silly." He said leaning his shoulders against the headboard.

"Nice to hear you think so." She smiled bleakly.

"Nawal, I may have joked but I never think of you as silly."

"Sometimes joking can turn into mocking. Instead of being funny it hurts."

He was astounded and she had obliterated his speech.

"We better sleep. I am really tired."

It was many hours later in the darkness of the room when she slept, he whispered,

"I am sorry."

****

Life is never static and people change with time. Nawal was learning in the next few days, she saw a new change in her husband. A change she had been craving for. He had become much more considerate and he was beginning to express his feelings to her. She liked this new side of him and was getting comfortable with him at a new level.

She had the laptop on her lap and was typing her assignment on the business plan she was making for an imaginary café business. She would be working late nights at times, Salman would snore away while she worked hard on the assignment. This Saturday afternoon was no different after lunch she was typing her assignment when Salman brought two steaming mugs to the room.

She glanced at him distractedly as she finished typing the sentence.

"I made you hot chocolate." He murmured placing the mug on the night stand.

Her eyes bulged out, "You made it?"

"Don't look so surprised. Yes I can cook small snacks and stuff."

She bit her lip but it was no use, she grinned, "Now this I really got to taste."

Taking one warm sip of the hot chocolate, she nodded in approval, "Not bad at all."

He narrowed his eyes, "Well Ms. Chef someday I will present you with breakfast in bed."

Her eyes again rounded, "That would be a day I will be waiting for then."

He chortled but sobered when his gaze slid to the laptop screen, "You are still working on the business plan?"

She frowned, "How do you know I have been working on the business plan?"

"Your laptop screen is always on and I have read few things here and there."

She was quiet and a little embarrassed, knowing he never thought highly of her.

"I must say I am impressed."

Her eyelids lifted to his, there was scepticism in them, "Really?"

"Yes especially the marketing plan. It was very innovative but you know for the financial plan..." As Salman explained the changes she could make, she hurriedly made notes. Time passed by and they discussed different aspects of the business plan until the mugs were emptied and her stomach grumbled in hunger.

Salman poked her side lightly, "Someone's hungry after all that work we have been doing."

Her cheeks warming, "Yes I will get some snack to eat and better go and help khala with dinner as well."

She was setting the laptop away when Salman suggested, "Let's go out for dinner."

Her eyebrows rose in astonishment. They hardly went out for any occasion. He nodded, "yes just the two of us to..umm..to... celebrate your business plan completion."

She giggled, "Wow if I knew doing assignments in front of you will lead to going out for dinners, I will do it daily."

"Don't push your luck."

She laughed harder, "Awww shucks."

Lightly pushing her off the bed, "C'mon missus time to get ready. Arabic food?"

A pleasing smile widening her lips, "Oh yes please."

And it was a wonderful dinner where they ate and had some more laughter.

****

Days passed by as the winter set in. The trees were getting bare and the freezing winds chilling the bones. An early morning class always lifted Nawal's mood but today she was sleepy beyond her understanding. Covering the back of her hand to her mouth as she yawned in the last few minutes of the class, she felt her phone vibrating. But she ignored it waiting for the class to end to check her phone.

"Next class I will be taking any questions regarding the group project you are working on. So there are no confusions," said Ms. Brady as she concluded the class.

Strolling out of the classroom, Nawal took out her phone and her heart nearly dropped seeing a text message from Daud.

.

Frowning, she dialled his number, "Why did you text me when I said I will."

"It's been two weeks I haven't heard anything from you. I missed you." He spoke huskily.

"Daud please I don't think I can talk to you anymore. I had a great time for a few days we spent together. But it is better we don't meet or talk anymore."

"Are we back to that again?" he sighed.

Walking ahead in the hall, she tucked the loose end of her pashmina hijab under her chin as she stepped outside the building and the icy wind hit her face. "You know I am married and you also know he is a very possessive man. I don't want to get into trouble." She exhaled, the smoke from her mouth clearly visible on this winter morning, "Besides everything has been much better between us. I really don't want to disrupt this peace."

"But we are friends that's all I ask Nawal. Nothing more. You aren't cheating on him or something." Daud persisted.

Buttoning her heavy woollen jacket she muttered, "He will not see it that way. Please leave me alone now." Without any proper farewell, she hung up the call.

Shocked, Daud stared at his phone that how casually she had dismissed him yet again. This was all because Salman was back. And the asshole had been sweet to her it seems she wasn't willing to meet or even talk to him now.

Taking out a cigarette from its pack, he placed it on his lips,

So Salman has been busy with his wife last few weeks. Let's see, how he takes out his time for her now.

Puffing the smoke out, his mind moving fast until a sly smile stretched on his lips.

****

"Salman, we have bad news." Breathlessly Salman's secretary informed as he barged into the room a few days later.

Salman scowled and stood up hastily from his swivel chair. He was donned in his dress white shirt and formal navy blue pants, "What is it? I have been getting calls and emails like crazy in last half an hour."

"One of the suppliers had been supplying non-halal meat and this news has been leaked to the media." The secretary announced.

He grew rigid, grabbing his blazer from behind his chair he strode towards the door, "Get an emergency meeting with the directors set up in 10 minutes. I want everyone in the conference room. This is a crisis we have to handle vigilantly. We have to make decisions before the press comes here."

Nodding vigorously the secretary followed Salman and followed his instructions.

The news spread fast and in it came the bad publicity for the business impacting it adversely. This was to be a start of weeks of hard work to bring back the company's image and confidence in the eyes of the consumers.

****

A week had passed since the news broke. Salman was working all day on the new crisis. He would leave work early morning and come back around midnight. He had no time at all for his gym as well. An activity he loved the most. Nawal was busy with her assignments but most of them were completed. Day by day, she got lonely and missed his companionship that had been built in the weeks after the business trip. Instead, she dedicated her time to her education but it wasn't enough.

There were days she didn't see him at all. He would be back late night when she was asleep and in the morning only a small greeting at the breakfast table and he would be gone for the day. She couldn't complain as the gravity of the situation was large. She just prayed he became successful and able to undo the damage that had tarnished the company's image.

It was late evening when she was watching a movie on Netflix with Manal when her phone buzzed. Her heartbeat accelerated seeing it was Daud texting him. She ignored it but then in next ten minutes her phone was ringing. This time it was a call from him. It was good that her phone was on silent mode and Manal wasn't able to detect what was happening.

Nawal yawned and mumbled sleepy, "Why don't you watch the rest of it. I think I will go to bed now."

Manal was engrossed in the movie and just nonchalantly nodded. Nawal slipped out of the room and once she was in her room with the door securely locked, she dialled Daud's number.

"Daud why do you keep calling?" she said exasperatedly.

"I missed you Nawal." His deep voice said through the phone.

Rubbing her forehead, she slumped on the bed, "Look I am really busy. We will talk some other time. Please just wait until I call you."

"I was watching television when horses came in an advertisement reminding me of our time at the stables."

She shut her eyes, why was he adamant to put her in such torture, "Don't Daud please." She whispered.

"We had so much fun that day. You know it is one of the most memorable days for me." he continued without acknowledging the torment she was going through.

Flashes of that day came back and she smiled, "yes and now it's the past. A beautiful past. Let us now focus on the future."

"Oh you know that pizza place where we got the pizza once. The guy there was asking about you." Daud easily switched the topic.

He was able to continue to converse for the next hour and soon Nawal had stopped arguing that she should end the call.

****

The situation was bad that even on Saturdays Salman was going to work and on Sundays, the only day off, he was sleeping most of the day or spending time in the gym. He literally had no time at all for Nawal. Just a week was left for the Christmas break, all Nawal's assignments were submitted and now she was getting desolate as she had nothing to do. On one Friday evening, Nawal decided to wait for Salman so they could spend some time alone. She had no classes that day and so she wasn't exhausted that she would need to sleep early.

Cosily sitting on the living room sofa, cuddled in a fleece throw, she was watching television but was getting bored by the minute. She was in two minds whether to text Daud just to say 'hello'. After many minutes of contemplating, courageously, she typed a text and within seconds a reply was prompted on the mobile screen. She smiled as they chatted on random life issues. They were joking and fooling around. Minutes turned to an hour and she didn't know when she ended up sleeping while texting Daud.

This is how Salman saw her, huddled in a throw on the couch with the phone in her hand. He bent down and brushed back her hair from her face. He was guilt-ridden of the fact he wasn't able to give her time but this crisis had a huge impact on sales and he couldn't afford severe damages. He had been struggling to race against time and restore the company image.

Kissing her temple softly, he took the phone from her hand. What was she up to using her phone late night? She hardly used her phone.

With that he punched in the security keypad lock to check himself...

_____________________________