Chapter 46

Fragmented Memories

I saw it happen with my own eyes.

Someone nearly knocked her over.

What the hell.

I ran towards the street.

I was right on the curb, but a car was passing by already.

I looked across the street,

the pavement becoming a sea between us.

And saw Aoi stumble back,

the man that bumped into her groping for her purse.

“Yamete!” I heard her cry.

“Oi!” My voice sounded louder than ever before.

“Nandato! Don’t touch her!”

I stepped off the curb in a hurry

and a second car narrowly missed me,

honking furiously. Damn it.

*Yamete - Stop! (request)

*Nandato - What the hell?

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Chapter 47

Fragmented Memories

The man looked at me with crazed eyes but continued to pull viciously.

I heard her scream, clutching tight at her purse,

holding it desperately against her body.

It pained my heart.

I was frantically looking left and right, but the cars kept coming.

I was getting quite desperate.

Come on, just give me a split second.

Give me a break, let me cross!

Instead, I saw more heading my way.

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Chapter 48

Fragmented Memories

“Oi! Stop! Someone help!

Anybody! I’m calling the cops!”

It seemed like I could only shout and watch helplessly.

My heart was pounding. I wanted to run across the street.

But I knew I would die if I tried.

I saw bystanders hesitating and pulling out their cell phones.

Call the police! I silently prayed.

The man looked desperate by now. Aoi was still struggling with him.

A third man came forward towards her -- friend or foe?

“Sei-chan!!”

There was finally a break between the cars

and I rushed forward, running towards Aoi.

I breathed out, relieved.

Wait for me, Aoi, I’m coming.

I would teach that guy a lesson.

I clenched one fist.

My other hand still wrapped around Aoi’s bouquet of flowers.

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Chapter 49

Fragmented Memories

Suddenly, I realized they were a bit too close to the curb.

Just as I was shouting "Watch out!" he gave one last pull.

But instead, the purse flew upwards.

It spiralled up into the air slowly.

As if time had slowed to a crawl,

suspended in a timeless chamber,

everything moving in slow motion.

I was halfway across the street, but I couldn't run as fast anymore.

I didn't know why. My legs wouldn't move.

The man stumbled back slowly. Even the purse was suspended in the air.

Then I watched Aoi, horrified.

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Chapter 50

Fragmented Memories

I saw it coming.

“Aoi!!” I heard my voice scream.

I saw her heels slipping off the curb;

I saw her falling backwards.

I screamed again.

I was halfway across the street,

still running towards her,

but my legs wouldn’t move any faster.

My legs wouldn’t move any faster.

I tried. I desperately tried.

If I could try harder.

A bit more time.

I could catch her. I could save her.

Then the headlights cast a heavenly glow on her.

On the girl I love.

Aoi’s white summer dress was floating,

glowing like an angel’s robes.

She was suspended in mid-air, falling, falling slowly.

Her arms were graceful.

It looked like she was drifting upon a cloud.

I could see her eyes wide now.

Frightened.

And I wasn’t there to hold her.

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Chapter 51

Fragmented Memories

I heard the squeal of tires on the pavement.

I smelled the burning rubber.

I saw the driver’s eyes wide, turning the wheel.

The car tried to swerve out of the way.

But the headlights were spinning, spinning.

I was nearly there. I was so close. Aoi!

Then everything stopped.

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Chapter 52

Fragmented Memories

I heard a deafening thump.

I heard a scream. Was that me?

The car screeched.

My chest hurt.

The world spun.

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Chapter 53

Fragmented Memories

Suddenly, I was moving forward too fast. I was falling. I hit the ground hard, the roses scattered across the road. I felt my body scream in pain. My chest hurt. I couldn’t breathe. Tears blurred my vision. They fell to the ground like rain. But I didn’t care. Aoi.

Aoi.

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Chapter 54

Fragmented Memories

The world around me stopped.

But I knew I couldn’t. Where was Aoi?

I forced myself up.

My body complained in agony.

All five foot eight of me easily rendered useless.

I was finally on my unsteady legs,

trembling and shaking like an old man.

I wiped the tears from my eyes.

“Aoi!” Was the first thing I said.

Then, I saw her.

Lying on the road.

A ruffled white flower.

Vulnerable, broken.

With the world still spinning around me,

I ran towards her, my mind full of dread.

This was like a nightmare.

Wake me up. Someone wake me up.

This has to be a nightmare.

But my heart drained of blood,

a million knives piercing me.

The girl I love.

I got to her side and saw dark crimson slowly pooling.

No.

“Aoi!”

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Chapter 55

Fragmented Memories

I crouched down slowly beside her.

She looked so delicate, like a flower.

I didn't want to touch her.

I was afraid I would break her.

I couldn't shout anymore.

I got down on my knees next to her, gently reaching around her.

We were alone now.

I felt like we were alone.

Just the two of us.

There was not a sound.

I lifted her head, and then her body,

gingerly cradling her fragile body in my arms.

She felt so limp, so weak, so small.

I wanted to protect her.

I had sworn to protect her.

But it was too late.

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Chapter 56

Fragmented Memories

“Aoi…” I whispered.

“Aoi..” My voice wavered as tears streamed down my face.

“Aoi..” My voice was shaking.

“Wake up! Wake up! Say something!”

I could only shake her lightly, desperately.

“Aoi! Please!”

I shook her harder.

“Please!”

My voice broke.

“Please….”

Then I felt her hand move.

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Chapter 57

Fragmented Memories

Her eyes opened slowly.

I made sure the first thing she saw was me.

I tried to smile.

“Aoi…I’m here. I’m here now. It’s okay.”

I tried to be as calm as I could,

but every fibre of my body was shaking.

It couldn't be compared to my heart however,

it was split apart brutally.

Then she smiled.

The only thing she did.

She smiled.

Tears fell down my face like a waterfall.

“It was my fault…”

I was sobbing like a child.

“It was my fault… Aoi..

It was my fault.

Don’t smile at me.

I couldn’t save you.”

She wanted to shake her head.

But I saw her eyebrows furrow in pain.

She gave me a small smile.

“Not your fault.”

Her voice was a ghost of a whisper.

Then she closed her eyes.

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Chapter 58

Fragmented Memories

"Aoi! Aoi! Somebody help!"

"Anybody!"

"Save her! Please! Call the ambulance!"

I shouted till my voice was hoarse.

I heard the world coming back to us now.

It was like suddenly being thrown into the ground.

I felt the hard cold pavement underneath,

mocking us, sneering with contemptuous animosity.

I felt more pain than I have ever felt before.

Bystanders gathered. There was a large crowd.

Murmuring fearful voices. Nervous pitying voices.

Some sobbing.

Some silent.

Some calling the police.

Why couldn't they save her?

I looked at them in hatred.

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Chapter 59

Fragmented Memories

Her cute innocent face, she was still smiling.

I couldn't stand it.

"Aoi! Look at me! Wake up! Say something!"

I was crying.

"l'm sorry! I'm so sorry! I wasn't there to protect you!"

It was my fault.

Why?

Why couldn't I run faster?

Why did I go buy the flowers?

Why was I so stupid?

Why didn't I get hit instead?

Anything other than this.

I had promised.

I felt hatred.

I hated myself.

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Chapter 60

Fragmented Memories

“Hang in there! Don’t leave me! Don’t leave me!”

My throat was sore.

“Please…I need you. Please.”

I buried my face on her chest.

I heard her exhale, it sounded painful.

“I’m still here… won’t leave you.”

She whispered in my ear.

I lifted my head to look at her.

My vision was blurry from the tears;

I wiped my eyes with my sleeve.

“Aoi…”

She slowly lifted her arm wincing at the exertion;

a shaky finger pointed at her purse.

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Chapter 61

Fragmented Memories

I reached for the soft deflated purse with one hand

blindly searching, my fingers raking across the rough pavement,

desperately, futilely. As if it would save her.

I felt it hook on my finger,

it's cream complexion dirtied against the ground.

With her still in my arms, I passed it to her.

The corner of her lips curved in a grin.

She was still playful even now.

I opened the purse for her,

hoping what she needed would

whisk us away from this nightmare.

Her fingers shifted through the contents

until she found what she was looking for.

She gave me a small smile and lifted it out.

It was a wooden box.

That wooden box.

Upon her bidding,

I opened it for her and heard the song.

Our song.

Aoi’s song.

My tears wouldn’t stop.

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Chapter 62

Fragmented Memories

"Aoi..."

She was trying to protect this?

I couldn't help but shake as new tears were wrenched out.

Like we were filthy rags soaked with rainwater,

lying on the street, painfully squeezed and dried of tears.

Crying until we could cry no more.

No, please don't let this be the end.

I could still hear our song floating from the music box,

little tendrils of hope leaking,

spiralling off into the damp air

-- truth or deceit I did not know.

Just please be okay.

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Chapter 63

Fragmented Memories

I reached for her hand, it was cooler now.

Her lips was losing their colour.

I was scared. I was trembling.

Like a child, I was helpless.

I could do nothing.

As I watched her draining away.

Nothing would help.

Nothing would save her.

Please. Please. Someone save her.

Please. Please. God save her.

Please. Please. Don't let her die.

Please. Please. I'll do anything.

Please. Please. I'll give up anything.

God, save her please.

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Chapter 64

Fragmented Memories

"It'll be okay."

I wish that were true.

I held her hand gently but firmly.

I will be her warmth.

"Let me be your strength." I whispered.

I steadied my voice.

"Look at me. Don't close your eyes." My voice trembled.

"Aoi.. don't close your eyes.

Fight...hang in there."

I was pleading as much as I was hoping.

I brushed her cheeks with my lips.

Don't leave me, Aoi. Don't leave me.

Her eyes opened wider.

I realized she looked scared now.

I held her hand up to my face, with a brave smile.

Then she was shivering. Trembling.

"Seii-chan.. I'm scared.. I'm scared."

I could see the blood on the roadside.

A widening gyre of red paint upon the black canvas,

the red stains on my shirt, on my hands,

her life ebbing away.

Stop. Stop. Stop.

Yet I could do nothing.

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Chapter 65

Fragmented Memories

Tears welled up in her eyes.

She was shaking.

“I’m here.. Aoi.. I’m here…”

“I’m scared…” She said again, her voice trembling.

Then her eyes opened wider.

I saw her frantically looking around, her eyes wandering.

Her tears fell down her cheeks.

I reached to brush away her tears, but only more came out.

Instead, I held her tighter against my body.

Trying to drown out her tears, her blood, her pain.

“I can’t see...Sei-chan.. I can’t see!”

She sobbed, her tears could fill up a river.

I held her tighter. My heart could break from the pain.

She was crying. I was crying.

“I can’t see… I don’t want to die.. I don’t want to die.. I want to be with you…Sei-chan!!”

She clutched my arms with as much strength as she could muster.

No.

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Chapter 66

Fragmented Memories

"You won't die. Aoi, I promise. You won't die."

I said with as much determination as I could give her.

This was too cruel. I had only turned 16 a few days ago.

Why, why, why must you do this to us?

There's no way this was happening.

This must be a dream, a nightmare.

I would wake up soon. I knew it.

"Seii.." She breathed.

She tried to look at me.

I could see her desperately try to look at me.

I might have looked at her with horrified eyes,

I might have looked at her with terrified eyes,

I might have looked at her with pained eyes,

but she couldn't see me anymore.

Her voice was frantic.

"I love you. I love you! Don't leave me!"

"I won't leave you! I love you too. I love you Aoi!

Don't forget that. Don't you ever forget that."

I held on to her as tight as I could.

As if I didn't let her go, she couldn't leave.

I saw her smile in reply.

She tried to wipe away her tears,

giving me her best smile.

Her final smile.

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Chapter 67

Fragmented Memories